Wikipedia:Peer review/List of Presidents of Pakistan/archive1
Appearance
Toolbox |
---|
This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I would like to take it to featured list status. Please have your comments/suggestions for further improvement.
Thanks, Zia Khan 16:42, 18 January 2013 (UTC)
Giants2008 comments –
In the hatnote, should both words in "Governors-Generals" need to be plural, or just one?Done
"and executive authorizations on key matters requires the both consultation and final confirmation...". Make "requires" singular, and flip the order of "the" and "both".Done
"Pakistan has been shifted back to the parliamentary democratic republic." "the" → "a"?"and performed ceremonial duties...". "performed" → "performs"?Done
"since the introduction of the post in 1956. The post...". Try to avoid having such close repetition of "post" like this.Done
"Three of them gained power through one of successful miltary coups in Pakistan's history". Add "the" before "successful"? And perhaps say how many coups there were, if a source can support it.Done
- Couldn't find a source that support them all together. Zia Khan 22:13, 21 January 2013 (UTC)
"The current President is of Pakistan...". Needs to be something like "The current President of Pakistan is...".Done
Yahya Khan entry: "He resigned as an result of Pakistan's defeat in the war." "an" → "a".Done
Pervez Musharraf: Add "a" into "and declared state of emergency."Done
"in order to avoid the impeachment." At a minimum, "the" should be removed; the "in order" could probably go too.Done
Publisher of reference 22 (The New York Times) should be italicized.Done Giants2008 (Talk) 03:42, 21 January 2013 (UTC)
- Thanks for the comments. Zia Khan 22:13, 21 January 2013 (UTC)
- Passing comment: President should not have a capital P because it's being used in a general sense and not to replace the officeholder's name. — Crisco 1492 (talk) 15:14, 31 January 2013 (UTC)
- Comments
- presidentofpakistan.gov.pk -> Presidency of the Islamic Republic of Pakistan
Done
- "Under this parliamentary system" - perhaps simply "under that system"
Done
- I would link figurehead, and perhaps name all figureheads in the lead.--Tomcat (7) 18:50, 9 February 2013 (UTC)
- I didn't get you, could you clarify this?
- I mean, I would link figurehead in the first occasion, and perhaps name in the lead all figureheads of Pakistan.--Tomcat (7) 21:22, 9 February 2013 (UTC)
- Done (only first part, I don't think the latter one is necessary).
- I mean, I would link figurehead in the first occasion, and perhaps name in the lead all figureheads of Pakistan.--Tomcat (7) 21:22, 9 February 2013 (UTC)
- I didn't get you, could you clarify this?
- Thanks for the review. Zia Khan 19:07, 9 February 2013 (UTC)