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User talk:KarenKoepp7/sandbox

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Hi Karen,

Here are some edits for you:

Make sure the "t" in the is capitalized in your first addition under the ethical concerns section

Here's a different way to phrase one of your sentences. I realize you may have phrased it the way you did to avoid plagiarism, but if so then it needs to be constructed in your words anyways:

"However, the committee claims, the use of preimplantation for non medical reasons is morally inappropriate."

The next section: to keep it more formal you my want to say couples from these countries/nations instead of areas

Also you bolded the citations, but did you find any for them. If not I'm sure it't fine since its not your work

Also add a comma to this sentence: (I added it here)

"Couples in these areas use reproductive technologies to choose the sex of their children, which ultimately leads to a skew the human sex ratio toward a disproportionately male population."


kshadK shad17 (talk) 20:38, 24 February 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Peer Review

[edit]

Hi Karen,

Your sources for the sections about ethical and demographic concerns make a great addition to the article. The second citation included in the ethical concerns section could be worded better but the point comes across encyclopedic.

For this citation:

"In addition, social risks of sex selection outweigh the social benefits of sex selection"

I think a little bit more of context should be included to make this statement stronger.

And it's most likely a glitch in Wikipedia but one of your sources in the section demographic concerns was left as "Citations" in bold.

Other than that, I think your sources were good and the one citation about China's family policy was a good introduction for that subsection.

Kcueva (talk) 07:22, 25 February 2017 (UTC)[reply]