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User talk:Hana.m.elarabi/sandbox

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One of the first things that stood out while reviewing your contribution to the Wikipedia assignment was the use of Professor Gelbart's first name. Well, rather a nickname for it. To me it just seems a tad informal. You also mention Gelbart working with someone named Avi. Perhaps a more detailed introduction of this person would help lessen questions that could arrive as to who they could be and their relevance. You wrote: "Following his sabbatical year, Bill returned to UCLA and began working on 'how him and Avi began thinking about how' they could treat the confinement of DNA genomes in viral capsids." This is an awkward sentence and could be potentially simplified to just, "... returned to UCLA and began working with Avi(this would be the place where a little background info on Avi would go, for example: ... working with Avi, a fellow UCLA professor or whomever they are), on how they could treat the confinement of DNA genomes in viral capsids. Also I did not see any citations or sources. I would assume you obtained this information from somewhere. If it was from a personal interview with Professor Gelbart I'm sure you could end your section with a citation and reference the aforementioned interview. Overall, it was a well written and detailed bibliography portion of Professor Gelbart's life and research.

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