Template:Did you know nominations/Mary Louise Graffam
Appearance
The following is an archived discussion of Mary Louise Graffam's DYK nomination. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page; such as this archived nomination"s (talk) page, the nominated article's (talk) page, or the Did you know
(talk) page. Unless there is consensus to re-open the archived discussion here. No further edits should be made to this page. See the talk page guidelines for (more) information.
The result was: promoted by Cwmhiraeth (talk) 13:35, 26 March 2013 (UTC).
DYK toolbox |
---|
Mary Louise Graffam
[edit]- ... that although Mary Louise Graffam (pictured) was an American Christian missionary, she is still considered a victim of the Armenian Genocide?
- ALT1 ... that teacher Mary Louise Graffam (pictured) hid hundreds of Armenian girls from the Ottoman Empire during the Armenian Genocide?
- ALT2 ... that missionary and teacher Mary Louise Graffam (pictured) hid hundreds of Armenian girls during the Armenian Genocide?
- Mentioning the Ottoman Empire in ALT1 is an even more grabbing hook...why the hesitation? -- Rcej (Robert) – talk 04:34, 12 March 2013 (UTC)
- The hook was good but "from the Ottoman Empire" sounds a bit off. It would be better if it were from Ottoman soldiers or Ottoman authorities or the like. I just couldn't decide what to replace it with. Also, I think it sounded more direct and to the point this way. Proudbolsahye (talk) 04:41, 12 March 2013 (UTC)
- Reviewed: Corkie Blow
Created by Proudbolsahye (talk). Self nominated at 23:17, 11 March 2013 (UTC).
Still needs reviewing. BlueMoonset (talk) 02:25, 24 March 2013 (UTC)
A really great article and fascinating hook (I'm liking Alt1 a lot).
But unfortunately I'm encountering a lot of close paraphrasing, particularly in the Life section, with the source America and the Armenian Genocide of 1915 (Footnote #1) and some from Armenian Sebastia/Sivas and Lesser Armenia (FN #3). I went ahead and redid a couple lines but I would encourage the editor to take a fresh set of eyes to the text.The article passes all other DYK criteria for date, length, Commons eligible image and referencing (though you could make the citations for the quotes more clear).But we need to get the close paraphrasing taken care before it gets approved.AgneCheese/Wine 22:18, 24 March 2013 (UTC)
For Alt1 Per a note on my talk page, I gave another review of the article. While I needed to do a few more minor tweaks, the article is much improved and I do not have the close paraphrasing concerns that I did before. As noted above, the article passes all other DYK criteria. AgneCheese/Wine 23:53, 24 March 2013 (UTC)