Template:Did you know nominations/Black Focus
- The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by SL93 (talk) 22:41, 11 January 2021 (UTC)
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Black Focus
... that after releasing the album Black Focus, the band Yussef Kamaal were denied entry to the United States because of the Trump Administration?[1]
Improved to Good Article status by 100cellsman (talk). Self-nominated at 04:49, 19 December 2020 (UTC).
References
- ^ "Yussef Kamaal and United Vibrations barred from entering America". Jazz FM. Archived from the original on 7 October 2018. Retrieved 3 October 2018.
- Will do a full review if we get this sorted but I immediately have some concerns over this Trump Administration content. It should be "denied entry ... by the Trump Administration", not "because of", for neutrality. I'm also a bit confused as to what actually happened here. Is the source referring to the Trump travel ban (possibly Executive Order 13780 specifically)? If so, I think the appropriate links and maybe some more explanation in the article is needed (without veering into original research). Are there any other sources on this subject? It would be helpful to know what specific rule prohibited the group from entry, as I don't see a part of the travel ban which would affect British citizens, or is that information not known? — Bilorv (talk) 00:28, 23 December 2020 (UTC)
- They were unable to tour because one of the members, Yussef Dayes, had his visa revoked under the executive order. I wasn't sure how to word this because it would have seemed too long. 웃OO 02:34, 23 December 2020 (UTC)
- Yes, I understand this part. You can change "because of" to "by" or use the alt below:
- ALT1: ... that after releasing the album Black Focus, Yussef Kamaal were denied entry to the United States because one of the members had their visa revoked by the Trump Administration?
- But what I don't understand is what executive order revoked Dayes' visa and what part of the order would do that? (Is he not a British citizen? What category did he fall into that had new visa restrictions?) — Bilorv (talk) 09:49, 23 December 2020 (UTC)
- Dayes is British, and unfortunately, I couldn't find precise details regarding the ban. The sources I looked into state that they were just "(New) Executive Order(s)". A travel ban if anything. Thinking about it, I made a mistake to nominate this statement as a DYK. There's not much factual context that would be good for a hook and one would have to get to know the band first to understand the story. Plus it seems like bad taste to use this fact to speak for an album. 웃OO 10:12, 23 December 2020 (UTC)
- Okay, I see, no more information is available. I think the original hook with "because of" replaced to "by" or my suggestion ALT1 would both work as fine hooks—hooks are often teasers to get people to read about the subject and don't need to be representative of the topic as a whole. But if you want to withdraw the nomination then I can reject it for you. Either way, thanks for your work in getting this article to GA status. — Bilorv (talk) 10:41, 23 December 2020 (UTC)
- You made a good point, we can carry on with the nomination. I do think ALT 1 is better than what I typed up. 웃OO 06:23, 25 December 2020 (UTC)
- Was promoted to GA and has sufficient length and (inline) sourcing, no QPQ needed (1 credit), no copyvio that I can detect (Earwig just shows sites copying Wikipedia). I've been stung before so pinging Yoninah for an opinion on whether we need someone else to review ALT1 (since I suggested it) or if I'm fine to approve it (since it's the same fact with the same sourcing as ALT0). — Bilorv (talk) 15:59, 25 December 2020 (UTC)
- You made a good point, we can carry on with the nomination. I do think ALT 1 is better than what I typed up. 웃OO 06:23, 25 December 2020 (UTC)
- Okay, I see, no more information is available. I think the original hook with "because of" replaced to "by" or my suggestion ALT1 would both work as fine hooks—hooks are often teasers to get people to read about the subject and don't need to be representative of the topic as a whole. But if you want to withdraw the nomination then I can reject it for you. Either way, thanks for your work in getting this article to GA status. — Bilorv (talk) 10:41, 23 December 2020 (UTC)
- Dayes is British, and unfortunately, I couldn't find precise details regarding the ban. The sources I looked into state that they were just "(New) Executive Order(s)". A travel ban if anything. Thinking about it, I made a mistake to nominate this statement as a DYK. There's not much factual context that would be good for a hook and one would have to get to know the band first to understand the story. Plus it seems like bad taste to use this fact to speak for an album. 웃OO 10:12, 23 December 2020 (UTC)
- Yes, I understand this part. You can change "because of" to "by" or use the alt below:
- They were unable to tour because one of the members, Yussef Dayes, had his visa revoked under the executive order. I wasn't sure how to word this because it would have seemed too long. 웃OO 02:34, 23 December 2020 (UTC)
Main review done but need another reviewer to check the hook ALT1 (per advice from Yoninah here). — Bilorv (talk) 21:35, 27 December 2020 (UTC)
A new hook is needed per Wikipedia talk:Did you know#Using unlinked names in hooks. SL93 (talk) 14:54, 11 January 2021 (UTC)
