Talk:Roy McGrath
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Roy McGrath has been listed as one of the History good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it. Review: March 24, 2024. (Reviewed version). |
A news item involving Roy McGrath was featured on Wikipedia's Main Page in the In the news section on 5 April 2023. |
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A fact from Roy McGrath appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the Did you know column on 29 May 2023 (check views). The text of the entry was as follows:
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Betrayed: The True Story of Roy McGrath
[edit]During McGrath's manhunt, a self-published e-book titled Betrayed: The True Story of Roy McGrath was listed on Amazon by an unknown author who gave the name Ryan C. Cooper. He claims that this book is based on McGrath's own manuscripts and interviews between him and the author, and the book makes several claims that were relevant to his federal and state trials, including claims that Hogan had approved his severance payment. However, the book makes these claims without providing any actual evidence, and McGrath's wife says she doesn't even know who Cooper is. A second book was released just a few days ago, this time covering more details about his time as the MES director.
When I was writing this page last night, I decided against mentioning these books, seeing that individuals close to McGrath and the trial had disputed its contents. However, I'd like to get some consensus before I totally close the door on including anything about the book on this page. Would it be appropriate to mention these books on the page? Y2hyaXM (talk) 17:25, 4 April 2023 (UTC)
- I've decided to add a paragraph about these books following new reports that showed that McGrath was Ryan C. Cooper. Y2hyaXM (talk) 00:46, 6 September 2023 (UTC)
Did you know nomination
[edit]- The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Cielquiparle (talk) 07:57, 23 May 2023 (UTC)
- ... that Roy McGrath, who was the chief of staff to Maryland Governor Larry Hogan, was wanted by the Federal Bureau of Investigation and was killed during a shootout by agents? Source: https://www.cbsnews.com/news/roy-mcgrath-captured-larry-hogan-former-chief-of-staff-maryland/
- Reviewed:
Created by TDKR Chicago 101 (talk). Self-nominated at 21:53, 4 April 2023 (UTC). Post-promotion hook changes for this nom will be logged at Template talk:Did you know nominations/Roy McGrath; consider watching this nomination, if it is successful, until the hook appears on the Main Page.
General: Article is new enough and long enough |
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Policy compliance:
- Adequate sourcing:
- Neutral:
- Free of copyright violations, plagiarism, and close paraphrasing: - looks to be a problem
Hook: Hook has been verified by provided inline citation |
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QPQ: Done. |
Overall: @TDKR Chicago 101: Good article. Though, earwig looks to have identified some possible copyvio problems and I would like an explanation for it. Onegreatjoke (talk) 20:12, 5 April 2023 (UTC)
- @TDKR Chicago 101: I'd recommend you to check https://copyvios.toolforge.org/ and check the article for it to see if there are any copyvios that I've called out. I'm not exactly sure if this is a case of WP:MIRROR so I'd like for you to have a look. Onegreatjoke (talk) 02:06, 9 April 2023 (UTC)
- @Onegreatjoke: I've used the tool [1] and it says copyvio is unlikely. — Preceding unsigned comment added by TDKR Chicago 101 (talk • contribs) 16:42, 14 April 2023 (UTC)
- @Onegreatjoke: Failed ping. {{ping|ClydeFranklin}} (t/c) 20:40, 17 April 2023 (UTC)
- @Onegreatjoke: status report? theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:45, 25 April 2023 (UTC)
- @Onegreatjoke: Failed ping. {{ping|ClydeFranklin}} (t/c) 20:40, 17 April 2023 (UTC)
- @Onegreatjoke: I've used the tool [1] and it says copyvio is unlikely. — Preceding unsigned comment added by TDKR Chicago 101 (talk • contribs) 16:42, 14 April 2023 (UTC)
- There used to be paraphrasing but it doesn't look like it's there anymore. Onegreatjoke (talk) 14:17, 27 April 2023 (UTC)
- @Onegreatjoke: Is this nom good for posting soon?
- @TDKR Chicago 101 and Onegreatjoke: What a riveting story! I was ready to promote this...but was disappointed to find the last sentence of the article is lacking a citation!!! Please add a citation or remove the final comment if it is based on OR or speculation. Cielquiparle (talk) 16:59, 20 May 2023 (UTC)
GA Review
[edit]The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewing |
- This review is transcluded from Talk:Roy McGrath/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: Mokadoshi (talk · contribs) 05:16, 16 March 2024 (UTC)
GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not) |
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Comments
[edit]Lead
[edit]- According to MOS:FIRSTBIO, the first sentence of a biographical article should list noteworthy positions and what they are best known for. Currently, your first sentence is
Roy C. McGrath was an American political operative and fugitive...etc...
. This definitely satisfies what he's best known for, but I think you should begin the first sentence by introducing him as either the former chief of staff to Hogan, or as "a former Maryland public official" or something similar. Definitely don't want to overload the first sentence, so I'll leave it to you. I might suggest looking at other articles from List of American federal politicians convicted of crimes, like perhaps Duncan D. Hunter. Mokadoshi (talk) 23:26, 23 March 2024 (UTC)- Lead looks good now, thanks. Mokadoshi (talk) 00:59, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
Layout
[edit]- Optional: It is not required, but biographies typically begin with an "Early life and education" section followed by a "Career" section. Mokadoshi (talk) 23:26, 23 March 2024 (UTC)
Citations
[edit]where he described himself as the "CEO"
. The source saysMcGrath fashioned himself as a “CEO” of the independent agency
but it's not clear to me whether this is actually quoting McGrath or whether these are scare quotes. Do we have a different reference that explicitly says that he called himself CEO? Mokadoshi (talk) 23:34, 23 March 2024 (UTC)- The Steve Thompson article in WaPo is a better source for this, and gives more quotes that could be a good addition to the article. Mokadoshi (talk) 23:50, 23 March 2024 (UTC)
- Your tweak on the wording looks good. Mokadoshi (talk) 01:01, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- The Steve Thompson article in WaPo is a better source for this, and gives more quotes that could be a good addition to the article. Mokadoshi (talk) 23:50, 23 March 2024 (UTC)
"operates more like a business than a state agency."
McGrath did not say these words. It is even more clear he didn't say them if you look at the actual op-ed he wrote, which should probably be what is cited here anyway since the article is specifically cited in the article. Mokadoshi (talk) 23:40, 23 March 2024 (UTC)- This looks good. Mokadoshi (talk) 01:04, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
calling its disclosure "truly shocking"
Verified with source. Mokadoshi (talk) 23:50, 23 March 2024 (UTC)MES board members testified that they were "probably misled" by McGrath
. I don't see the wordsprobably misled
in the source. What I see isThree members of the service’s nine-member board told legislators they feel misled by Roy McGrath about his severance. They testified at an oversight hearing that McGrath assured them Hogan supported the plan to pay McGrath about $238,000 earlier this summer.
. Mokadoshi (talk) 23:50, 23 March 2024 (UTC)- @Y2hyaXM I think this is still not done. I see you added a source which includes the words "probably misled" but you shouldn't use quotation marks unless the board members actually used these words. I would fix it myself but I want to make sure you agree. Mokadoshi (talk) 01:06, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- I used the quotation marks because that's what was used around those words in the article - feel free to fix Y2hyaXM (talk) 01:08, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- I don't see quotation marks in the WaPo article, so I will remove it. Mokadoshi (talk) 01:12, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- I used the quotation marks because that's what was used around those words in the article - feel free to fix Y2hyaXM (talk) 01:08, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Y2hyaXM I think this is still not done. I see you added a source which includes the words "probably misled" but you shouldn't use quotation marks unless the board members actually used these words. I would fix it myself but I want to make sure you agree. Mokadoshi (talk) 01:06, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
invoking the Fifth Amendment to the United States Constitution more than 170 times.
This has two references. The WaPo reference says 130 times, the Maryland Matters says 170 times. Not sure which one is correct. Mokadoshi (talk) 23:50, 23 March 2024 (UTC)- This is done. Mokadoshi (talk) 01:07, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
"politically-motivated bullies" ... "the exculpatory facts will come to light and speak for themselves"
Verified with source. Mokadoshi (talk) 00:03, 24 March 2024 (UTC)"I know you did nothing wrong. I know it is unfair. I will stand with you"
Verified with both sources. Mokadoshi (talk) 00:03, 24 March 2024 (UTC)alleging that McGrath had forged a "memorandum" from Hogan that "approved" his severance payment
This shouldn't be quoted, this should just sayalleging that McGrath had forged a memorandum from Hogan approving the severance payment
Mokadoshi (talk) 00:03, 24 March 2024 (UTC)sought to seize $119,000 in assets from an TD Ameritrade account belonging to McGrath, alleging that the account was entirely funded by his MES severance payment
Verified with source. Mokadoshi (talk) 00:03, 24 March 2024 (UTC)multiple counts of "unlawful intercept" and misconduct
. There are two citations for this sentence. The Maryland Matters doesn't have this quote. The second, NBC Washington, does, but it says it just means "wiretapping." I think we should just change this tomultiple counts of wiretapping and misconduct
. Optional: you may also mention the state charges for theft and embezzlement, but you should only cite the Maryland Matters for that as NBC Washington only mentions the wiretapping charges. Mokadoshi (talk) 00:03, 24 March 2024 (UTC)- Looks good. Mokadoshi (talk) 01:09, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
He was due to stand trial for the state charges in July 2023.
Do you have a source for this? Mokadoshi (talk) 00:05, 24 March 2024 (UTC)- Looks good. Mokadoshi (talk) 01:13, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
"semi-retired man who moved from Hagerstown to Florida"
This isn't a direct quote from "Cooper", we should just delete the quotation marks. Mokadoshi (talk) 00:08, 24 March 2024 (UTC)- Looks good. Mokadoshi (talk) 01:14, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
A third book was planned to release "once more was known about McGrath's location", but never published.
Again, like above, this shouldn't be quoted as it's not a direct quotation from "Cooper." Also, the bit aboutbut never published
isn't supported by the cited reference. You should use a different citation for that part. Mokadoshi (talk) 00:10, 24 March 2024 (UTC)- Looks good. Mokadoshi (talk) 01:19, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
On April 3, 2023, FBI agents sought to arrest McGrath at a Costco Wholesale store near the 10700 block of Kingston Pike in Farragut, Tennessee.
There are two references for this sentence, but neither of them say anything about Costco, the10700 block of Kingston Pike
or Farragut, Tennessee. Mokadoshi (talk) 00:26, 24 March 2024 (UTC)- Looks good. Mokadoshi (talk) 01:24, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
He ignored police trying to arrest him, resulting in a police chase that ended when McGrath was boxed in near a local fast-food restaurant and auto parts store.
Verified with source.McGrath ignored demands to put his hands out the driver's side window and told agents that he had a loaded gun, which he fired at his right temple. At the same time, FBI agents fired at McGrath, striking his left cheek.
The Baltimore Banner source doesn't give this information, but the Maryland Matters reference from the previous sentence does, I think they were mixed up. Mokadoshi (talk) 00:26, 24 March 2024 (UTC)- This looks good. Mokadoshi (talk) 01:37, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
He was arrested and taken to the University of Tennessee Medical Center, where he died 25 minutes later.
There are three references for this sentence, but it doesn't seem supported by any of them. None of them mention the University of Tennessee Medical Center, or how soon after he arrived there that he died. Mokadoshi (talk) 00:26, 24 March 2024 (UTC)- @Y2hyaXM I see you added a Darcy Costello reference, which does say he was taken to the University of Tennessee Medical Center. But which source says he died 25 minutes after arriving? I think I'm missing it. Mokadoshi (talk) 01:37, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- The Maryland Matters source says it was 30 minutes Y2hyaXM (talk) 01:41, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- Thanks, I fixed the ordering of the references there. Mokadoshi (talk) 01:58, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- The Maryland Matters source says it was 30 minutes Y2hyaXM (talk) 01:41, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Y2hyaXM I see you added a Darcy Costello reference, which does say he was taken to the University of Tennessee Medical Center. But which source says he died 25 minutes after arriving? I think I'm missing it. Mokadoshi (talk) 01:37, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
McGrath married his first wife, Yuliya (anglicized to Julia, née Kryvenko), in 1997, and was divorced in 2010.
Verified with source. Mokadoshi (talk) 00:28, 24 March 2024 (UTC)In August 2020, the Baltimore Sun reported that McGrath received a $238,250 severance package that included a year's salary after voluntarily leaving the Maryland Environmental Service
I'm struggling to understand where this number comes from. The report saysMcGrath’s position at the agency paid $233,647 a year for the fiscal year that ended June 30
, is this it? Or is this what he was paid for the whole year? I'm not sure. @Y2hyaXM: do you know? Mokadoshi (talk) 00:58, 24 March 2024 (UTC)- @Mokadoshi I got it from here, but it looks like the $233,647 number may be more accurate as it's the number reference in the DoJ's indictment. Y2hyaXM (talk) 01:03, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Y2hyaXM Got it, can you update the article and the lead with the $233,647 number, and update the reference for both to point to the indictment? Mokadoshi (talk) 01:16, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- Done, think I've added it in the right place Y2hyaXM (talk) 01:23, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Y2hyaXM Got it, can you update the article and the lead with the $233,647 number, and update the reference for both to point to the indictment? Mokadoshi (talk) 01:16, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Mokadoshi I got it from here, but it looks like the $233,647 number may be more accurate as it's the number reference in the DoJ's indictment. Y2hyaXM (talk) 01:03, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
Coverage
[edit]- McGrath resigned in August 2020, and he was not to appear in court until March 2023. Other than the testimonies that he provided in December 2020, is it known what else he did between those dates, other than the testimonies he gave that are already discussed in the article? Mokadoshi (talk) 23:26, 23 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Mokadoshi I've just made a change that should fix the issues with the lead and "probably misled" citation. I'm working on the other issues now. As for what McGrath did between August 2020 and March 2023, all that's been publicly reported about what McGrath did during this timespan is that he moved from Maryland to Florida, claimed Hogan approved of his severance package, and testified to the Joint Committee on Fair Practices and State Personnel Oversight about his tenure at the MES. Y2hyaXM (talk) 00:19, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- Yep, that's what I thought. I'll mark "broad coverage" as complete then. Mokadoshi (talk) 00:29, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Mokadoshi I've made further adjustments that should fix the other issues you've added. Please let me know if you have any other recommendations, especially regarding the Steve Thompson article. Thanks for reviewing! Y2hyaXM (talk) 00:45, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- Yep, that's what I thought. I'll mark "broad coverage" as complete then. Mokadoshi (talk) 00:29, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Mokadoshi I've just made a change that should fix the issues with the lead and "probably misled" citation. I'm working on the other issues now. As for what McGrath did between August 2020 and March 2023, all that's been publicly reported about what McGrath did during this timespan is that he moved from Maryland to Florida, claimed Hogan approved of his severance package, and testified to the Joint Committee on Fair Practices and State Personnel Oversight about his tenure at the MES. Y2hyaXM (talk) 00:19, 24 March 2024 (UTC)
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