Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/Peer review/Fort Bliss

Fort Bliss

I have been working on this article for some monthes, and have already gotten some good advise for improving it from project members — notably oldwindybear — but I still need sugestions and ideas. I have had no hits on the Wikipedia peer review page since September, so I am filing a request here in the hopes that those who are intersested in military related material will leave some comments for me. Any suggestions here will be combined with those recieved during the assessment of Fort Bliss from last month.

IMPORTANT I am in school at the moment, so if I appear slow to respond here have patients; its likely school work has me tied up. TomStar81 (Talk) 23:38, 14 October 2006 (UTC)[reply]

Please see automated peer review suggestions here. Thanks, AZ _t 22:43, 30 October 2006 (UTC)[reply]
- Whew, thats a relief. I was afraid there for a moment that Kirill would be the only person offering any advice ;) TomStar81 (Talk) 08:20, 31 October 2006 (UTC)[reply]

Kirill Lokshin

This is quite good now; a few issues still need work, though:

Heading should be sentence case.
The last few sub-sections of the "Fort Bliss Today" section need to be turned into prose, rather than bulleted lists. I also question both the sourcing and the value of some of the contents; Wikipedia isn't really supposed to be a travel guide.
Separating the BRAC sections out like that seems a bit counterintuitive; I would weave them into the main narrative chronologically.
The units in the infobox should be wikified; I assume all of them are worthy of articles.
Why "Southwestern United States" and not "Texas" in the infobox?
"References" should be placed before "External links"

Kirill Lokshin 00:49, 16 October 2006 (UTC)[reply]

At present I have answers for three of your points: 1) The BRAC section is/was created in accordance with the instructions on the talk page for the BRAC template. Those instruction may need to be looked at in a "past BRAC" sense, so that this information can migrate into an articles history section. 2) Believe it or not, I actually uploaded my Rough Draft version for the post with wikified units in the infobox, but of the entire group only two had prexisting articles. That may be an oversight on my part, so I will recheck the info. 3) Fort Bliss is listed as "Southwestern United States" and not "Texas" because the overwhelming majority of the land designated as property of Fort Bliss lies in southern New Mexico, primarily in the Doña Ana and Otero county area; therefore to say "Texas" would be technically correct but at the same time cut out most of the military ranges. — Preceding unsigned comment added by TomStar81 (talk • contribs)

Ah, ok. Personally, I'd disegard the BRAC template and just go with whatever is more natural for the article; I doubt that the template in question was the result of extensive thought about the best structure, rather than just an easy way of making the massive updates necessary for the actual running BRAC round. Kirill Lokshin 12:49, 16 October 2006 (UTC)[reply]

On Friday, scheduals permitting, I intend to spend the day in the archives room at the UTEP library. I will be looking over press reports for the '05 BRAC round to firm up the numbers, units, personel, and general scheme of the tranformation at the base. I will also look into the '95 and '88 BRAC rounds and see if I can turn up additional information for the realignment of Fort Bliss. When I do I will add that information here and then see about integrating the BRAC section with the mainstream history section. TomStar81 (Talk) 05:55, 17 October 2006 (UTC)[reply]

Some new material for the '05 BRAC round has been added, I will add more as time becomes available. Right now, school work has me tied down. TomStar81 (Talk) 05:12, 21 October 2006 (UTC)[reply]