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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

Article promoted by Zawed (talk) via MilHistBot (talk) 08:20, 15 February 2019 (UTC) « Return to A-Class review list[reply]

James Park Woods

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Nominator(s): Peacemaker67 (talk)

James Park Woods (edit | talk | history | links | watch | logs)

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Woods is the latest in a long-term project I have to get all the South Australian Victoria Cross recipients to FA. Woods was a member of a four-man patrol sent to make contact with a flanking British unit after an attack, but instead found a strongly-held German position. He led the patrol against the German post, putting thirty enemy to flight, then helped hold it until reinforcements arrived. I believe I have found everything available on him. The article recently went through GAN. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 08:32, 1 January 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Comments Support from AustralianRupert: G'day, PM, nice work. I have a few suggestions/comments below: AustralianRupert (talk) 10:39, 4 January 2019 (UTC)[reply]

  • no dabs, one duplicate link (VC in the lead), although that seems acceptable due to how it is being used (no action required)
  • suggest adding alt text to the images: [1]
  • ext links all work (no action required)
  • Following his parents' deaths: is there any information on how they died?
  • This time was spent first at Cuhem, then Friancourt before finally spending a few weeks: is there a way to avoid "spent" and "spending" in the same sentence?
  • and they were followed by the 45th Battalion and 46th Battalion --> "and they were followed by the 45th and 46th Battalions"?
  • Woods climbed onto the parapet and laid down, and threw hand grenades passed to him. --> "Woods climbed onto the parapet, laid down, and threw hand grenades passed to him"?
  • to attend the VC centenary.[2][1]: suggest re-ordering the refs so they appear in numerical order
  • suggest maybe mentioning that he was a keen cricketer in his early years, and that his sons served in the RAAF during the Second World War (per Higgins)
  • His medal set, including his Victoria Cross, was presented to the Australian War Memorial: do we know which year this occured?
  • images: image licencing looks ok, but I wonder if "File:Morning a Passchendaele. Frank Hurley.jpg" should have the {{PD-AustraliaGov}} licence?
  • sources: for what they are citing, the sources appear reliable to me (no action required)
  • survived by his wife and five children: Higgins says "Survived by his wife, three sons and three daughters". Has Higgins not taken into account Gordon's earlier death? AustralianRupert (talk) 10:44, 4 January 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Image review

CommentsSupport from Harry:

  • On the day after the battalion was relieved and went into the rear area, Woods reported sick, was diagnosed with either bronchitis or pericarditis, and was evacuated to a hospital in Birmingham... feels like a bit of a run-on sentence. Maybe split it up a bit?
  • Woods' VC was the only one awarded to a member of 48th Battalion,[22] and he received his VC Maybe split those sentences rather than join two unrelated clauses with an "and"
  • Can we include a little bit of context on the Swan Valley for those unfamiliar with Australian geography?
  • He was married on 30 April 1921 to Olive Adeline Wilson, the couple had seven children That's a comma splice
  • , with Gordon, the eldest Try to avoid ", with" constructions

Only minor stuff. Excellent work. HJ Mitchell | Penny for your thoughts? 16:29, 10 January 2019 (UTC)[reply]

G'day Harry, thanks for taking a look at it. I've fixed those things, and added that Caversham is now an outer suburb of Perth, the state capital. Is that enough geographical context? Cheers, Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 01:39, 11 January 2019 (UTC)[reply]
I'm more than happy with that. Nice work. Supporting. HJ Mitchell | Penny for your thoughts? 09:43, 11 January 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Support Comments from Ian:

  • Nice work as usual, PM -- let me know any issues with my copyedit. Other points...
    • Caversham is now a outer suburb of the state capital, Perth. -- I see Harry's comment above but this breaks the flow and doesn't seem very necessary to me since Caverhsam is linked; I guess I could handle it in a footnote as a compromise...
    • The 48th Battalion was relieved from this position on 1 October, and occupied trenches at Westhoek Ridge overnight before returning to Steenvoorde by bus. -- Is "by bus" significant? If not I'd lose it.
    • The lead makes mention of "the first objective" of the attack on the Hindenburg Outpost Line, but this first objective isn't mentioned (or at least not explicitly) in the relevant spot in the main body.
  • No special concerns re. comprehensiveness.
  • I'll take AR's and Nikki's image reviews as read.
  • Sources look reliable; formatting-wise, the only thing is the "SA BDM" (FN3) doesn't immediately equate with "Genealogy SA", so perhaps the latter could be used.

Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 11:44, 4 February 2019 (UTC)[reply]

c/e looks good, thanks. All done, Ian Rose. Here are my edits. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 00:33, 5 February 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Just checking you've seen this, Ian Rose. Looks good to go otherwise. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 05:27, 9 February 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Yeah, sorry mate, got waylaid. I did tweak the lead to drop references to the "third phase" as I think it still begged the question "what about the second?" but pls reword or rv if you don't think it's an improvement -- happy to support in any case. Tks/cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 10:21, 14 February 2019 (UTC)[reply]
That's definitely better. Thanks, Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 22:08, 14 February 2019 (UTC)[reply]
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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