Wikipedia:WikiProject Biography/Peer review/50 Cent
A lot of people have worked hard to improve this article, I think it's close to GA. Comments are welcome, Tayquan hollaMy work 04:11, 14 May 2007 (UTC)
Automated review
[edit]- Please see automated peer review suggestions here. Thanks, APR t 23:58, 17 May 2007 (UTC)
I've already mentioned this on the talk page, but I think the main thing holding this back from a GA is the controversies, especially the "Other New York rappers" section, which simply names other artists without context. Spellcast 08:50, 17 May 2007 (UTC)
- I cut and pasted the automated suggestions here, I'll work on them tomorrow. Tayquan hollaMy work 02:59, 18 May 2007 (UTC)
- I'll strike out the points that have been accomplished. Spellcast 04:30, 18 May 2007 (UTC)
- I cut and pasted the automated suggestions here, I'll work on them tomorrow. Tayquan hollaMy work 02:59, 18 May 2007 (UTC)
The following suggestions were generated by a semi-automatic javascript program, and might not be applicable for the article in question.
Please expand the lead to conform with guidelines at Wikipedia:Lead. The article should have an appropriate number of paragraphs as is shown on WP:LEAD, and should adequately summarize the article.[?]Comment I expanded the lead it's still two paragraphs however, not sure if that's long enough. Tayquan hollaMy work 14:51, 19 May 2007 (UTC)- I think it's fine now, I just summarized the article and made it three paragraphs. Tayquan hollaMy work 15:07, 19 May 2007 (UTC)
*Per Wikipedia:Context and Wikipedia:Manual of Style (dates), months and days of the week generally should not be linked. Years, decades, and centuries can be linked if they provide context for the article.[?]
- Done. I don't think years alone such as '1997' need to be linked. Spellcast 13:12, 18 May 2007 (UTC)
*See if possible if there is a free use image that can go on the top right corner of this article.[?]
If this article is about a person, please add{{persondata|PLEASE SEE [[WP:PDATA]]!}}
along with the required parameters to the article - see Wikipedia:Persondata for more information.[?]
*Per Wikipedia:Manual of Style (numbers), there should be a non-breaking space -
between a number and the unit of measurement. For example, instead of 8 Mile, use 8 Mile, which when you are editing the page, should look like: 8 Mile.[?]
- Here, 8 Mile is a soundtrack/movie, not a unit of measurement, so it doesn't need a -
. Spellcast 11:00, 18 May 2007 (UTC)
*Per Wikipedia:Context and Wikipedia:Build the web, years with full dates should be linked; for example, link January 15, 2006.[?]
*Per Wikipedia:Manual of Style (headings), headings generally do not start with articles ('the', 'a(n)'). For example, if there was a section called ==The Biography==, it should be changed to ==Biography==.[?]
- The only heading starting with "The" is "The Game", which is allowed because it's a pronoun. Spellcast 04:41, 18 May 2007 (UTC)
*As per Wikipedia:Manual of Style (headings), please do not link words in headings.[?]
*Per Wikipedia:Manual of Style (headings), headings generally should not repeat the title of the article. For example, if the article was Ferdinand Magellan, instead of using the heading ==Magellan's journey==, use ==Journey==.[?]
*Per Wikipedia:Manual of Style (headings), avoid using special characters (ex: &+{}[]) in headings.
Per WP:WIAFA, this article's table of contents (ToC) may be too long- consider shrinking it down by merging short sections or using a proper system of daughter pages as per Wikipedia:Summary style.[?]
*Avoid using contractions like (outside of quotations): didn't, Isn't, couldn't, didn't, didn't, couldn't, Don't, don't, wouldn't, didn't, didn't, didn't, doesn't, wasn't, wasn't.
- As well quotations, I'm assuming contractions are allowed if it's the title of a cited source. Spellcast 04:30, 18 May 2007 (UTC)
- Please ensure that the article has gone through a thorough copyediting so that it exemplifies some of Wikipedia's best work. See also User:Tony1/How to satisfy Criterion 1a.[?]
- I'm not crossing this out because no matter how well you think an article is copy edited, there always seems to be something that can be improved. But I still think the prose is pretty good. Spellcast 19:57, 16 July 2007 (UTC)
You may wish to browse through User:AndyZ/Suggestions for further ideas. Thanks, APR t 23:57, 17 May 2007 (UTC)
- "and a small but permanent slur in his voice.[8][9][25]" When you have many citations in a row, you can combine them in one. Tourette syndrome indicates ways to do that.
- Comment I think the only way you can do that is if they're not repeated refs. Like if all three refs only occur in that spot, two of those are repeated refs. Tayquan hollaMy work 00:22, 24 May 2007 (UTC)
- Comment But those 3 refs are needed to verify each of those injuries. Ref 8 verifies the swollen tongue, ref 9 verifies the slight voice change, and ref 25 verifies the lost wisdom tooth. Spellcast 20:08, 25 May 2007 (UTC)
- Comment He's saying if the refs only appear in that spot you could do this <ref> ref 1 info <br> ref 2 info <br> ref 3 info </ref> from what i can tell by looking at that article. But that only works if none of the refs are repeated (incidentally the "br" makes the next ref go down a level but all three refs will appear in one footnote). Tayquan holla My work 00:38, 26 May 2007 (UTC)
- "Interscope then granted 50 Cent his own label, G-Unit Records in 2003.[34] He appointed his manager Sha Money XL as the president. The label signed ..." I think the prose is a bit choppy here.
- If there's no objections, I'll cut the part on Sha Money XL being president. It doesn't seem that significant to the article as a whole. Besides, Sha Money is no longer president. Spellcast 07:17, 30 May 2007 (UTC)
- No objection here. Tayquan holla My work 14:59, 3 June 2007 (UTC)
- "In March 2000, 50 Cent was punched by brothers Christopher and Irving Lorenzo (head of Murder Inc. Records) and then stabbed in the chest by rapper Black Child outside The Hit Factory studio in New York." Child's article just say that "on West 54th Street, future multi-platinum rapper 50 Cent had an altercation with Ja Rule, Black Child and others from Murda Inc." My point is that you make sure you describe all events in a NPOV way.
- Comment Ok I tweaked the wording and also corrected a factual error. This New York magazine article said 50 Cent was treated for a partially collapsed lung after being stabbed in the chest, but in this interview, he says it was three stitches. Spellcast 08:18, 8 June 2007 (UTC)
- "50 Cent released a song and video called "Funeral Music", in which he insults Cam'ron. Cam'ron also released a diss track and video called "Curtis". He also made a second derogatory video, "Curtis Pt. II". Young Buck and 50 Cent responded..." Again choppy. Take an overall look to the prose.
- Comment I agree. I added some info about what Cam'ron said, but I didn't know someone replied to this peer review. I'll definitely work on that part. Spellcast 14:14, 25 May 2007 (UTC)
- "When the album was released, 50 Cent felt The Game was disloyal for wanting to work with artists G-Unit was feuding with. He further claimed that he was not getting proper credit for the debut of the album." Citation for what you say 50 Cent claimed?--Yannismarou 16:07, 23 May 2007 (UTC)
- Comment I added a fact tag, I'll look for that later on. Tayquan hollaMy work 00:42, 24 May 2007 (UTC)
- Comment Done. I also added 4 citations. The Game is currently a GA and it also has a feud section with 50 Cent, so we can use that as a guideline. Spellcast 14:14, 25 May 2007 (UTC)
- Comment I added a fact tag, I'll look for that later on. Tayquan hollaMy work 00:42, 24 May 2007 (UTC)