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Wikipedia:Peer review/Sky City/archive1

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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because…

I wish to take this article to GA status [Not sure if FA status is possible with this article at all, but if it is, I will like to try it too, once I get it through GA.] The article topic seems pretty interesting, and looks like it could do good with getting the community's tag as one of the best articles in Wikipedia.

P.S. If I have placed it under the wrong category please correct it.

Thanks, TheOriginalSoni (talk) 12:40, 12 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Casliber

[edit]

Some notes:

  • NB: You want to have citations at least in every paragraph and for every piece if information sourced from a different source.
It will be good if you could point out where specifically are citations reqd on this page. Though i'll myself see about the one-citation per paragraph thing and see if anything is left out. TheOriginalSoni (talk) 06:03, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
In general, almost all paragraphs meet this rule. TheOriginalSoni (talk) 16:21, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • given you are moving between metric and imperial units, use both.
Is there any template that will convert the two and/or display both, or is manually converting and adding the only way to do it? TheOriginalSoni (talk) 06:06, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Nevermind. Got the template. Did the conversions partly. Do the others too need to be converted? Mind pointing which ones? TheOriginalSoni (talk) 16:21, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Just any which have both metric and imperial units (all weight and length ones) Casliber (talk · contribs) 19:01, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
 Done. TheOriginalSoni (talk) 20:05, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • If completed on schedule, the skyscraper will be the world's tallest building and will have the unique distinction of being constructed in only three months. - why would building it quickly make it the tallest..?
It wont. The project plans to have both of them - Building in 3 months; and being the tallest. Could it be reworded, or does the correct one make sense? TheOriginalSoni (talk) 06:03, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
You need to reword then, as it sounds like that its status as the tallest building depends on it being completed on schedule. Casliber (talk · contribs) 09:28, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
 Done. Good enough now? TheOriginalSoni (talk) 16:21, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Yes, better. Casliber (talk · contribs) 19:01, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • If built as planned and to schedule, Sky City would likely be the tallest building in the world at the time of its completion, with 220 floors and a total height of 838 meters. - presumably there is another very tall building being built at the same time? If so, slot a mention in.
i believe no. The only other to-be-constructed tall building seems way away from being completed. But I wanted to make sure we were not biased against the possiblity of other taller buildings coming up (as they always do) and so worded it that way. Should it be changed? TheOriginalSoni (talk) 06:03, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
same issue as in lead. Casliber (talk · contribs) 09:28, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
 Done. How about now? TheOriginalSoni (talk) 16:21, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Better. Casliber (talk · contribs) 19:01, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • As of June 8, 2012, the Broad Group had not yet obtained the final approval of the government. On September 5, the Economic Observer Online reported: "[Sky City project] is now kept in secret, and any information about the Sky City is not suitable for the public." - are these sentences still needed given the sentence which comes after them?
Not sure. I chose not to remove it since they seemed correct, and had already been there when I was editing it. Should I remove them? TheOriginalSoni (talk) 06:03, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
It just sounds like the sentences have been added as they have happened. It needs to be more cohesive. The June sentence is irrelevant now. Casliber (talk · contribs) 09:28, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
 Done. Timeline in order now. TheOriginalSoni (talk) 16:21, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • Link LEDs.
 Done
  • Can we link or discuss any previous buildings/projects this company has built?
See lead. TheOriginalSoni (talk) 19:15, 20 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]