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Wikipedia:Peer review/Capon Lake Whipple Truss Bridge/archive1

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To all concerned, I've listed this article for Peer Review because I would like to improve it in order to nominate it for Featured Article candidacy. Any and all guidance you could provide would be of the greatest help in preparing this article for FAC! -- West Virginian (talk) 11:14, 12 July 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Commments from Niagara

Looks great, I'm surprised there is so much on a little bridge. Have you looked at other FA bridge articles, like Plunketts Creek Bridge No. 3 or Sonestown Covered Bridge, as models?

  • My personal preference is to place the "Architecture" section ahead of the "History", so as to avoid trying to describe the bridge design before one actually gets to the design section.
  • Another preference of mine is to use the {{Infobox bridge}} or {{Geobox}} to include both bridge and NRHP info. Not a requirement for anything (people prefer different infoboxes, some like having no infoboxes), but since its a bridge article I like knowing the bridge's specification without to having to hunt for them.
  • Niagara, I've formatted a new template based on the one provided for Sonestown Covered Bridge. Please let me know if this works. Because this is a pedestrian bridge no longer in active highway service, it is not located in the national bridge database. -- West Virginian (talk) 01:22, 11 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • NRHP nomination forms generally have section and page numbers that you could use to cite; rather than saying "p. 8 of the PDF file", you could say "sec. 8, p. 4".
  • Niagara, I actually used to format my page numbers the way you've recommended here, but several reviewers of previous NRHP articles recommended that I choose the page number of the PDF file instead. I think both methods work just fine, and both make logical sense, but for consistency's sake, I'll go ahead and keep the PDF page number format as is. Thank you for the suggestion though! -- West Virginian (talk) 01:22, 11 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "...approximately 2.05 miles (3.30 km) southwest...": That seems incredibly precise to be an approximation.
  • "...by civil engineer Squire Whipple in 1847, the same year in which he received a patent for the design from the U.S. Patent Office."
Condensed and reversed "...in 1847 by civil engineer Squire Whipple, who received a patent from the U.S. Patent Office the same year."
  • "The T. B. White and Sons iron bridge construction company that built the Capon Lake Whipple Truss Bridge was established in 1868 by Timothy B. White, who had been working as a carpenter and contractor in New Brighton, Pennsylvania, since the 1840s."
Run-on sentence, perhaps "The construction company that built the Capon Lake Whipple Truss Bridge, T. B. White and Sons, was established in 1868. Its founder Timothy B. White had been a carpenter and contractor in New Brighton, Pennsylvania since the 1840s."
  • "Because Whipple truss bridges were easily disassembled and re-erected..." and "The Capon Lake Whipple Truss Bridge was originally constructed in 1874..."
One sentence paragraphs, should be merged into another.
  • "as of that year the bridge is maintained...": Seems stuck on to an already long sentence, might better as a separate sentence (perhaps "Since its listing the bridge is maintained...")
  • "The property containing the Capon Lake Whipple Truss Bridge is less than 1 acre (0.40 ha) in size.": Doesn't really need to included here or in the infobox, as its not really that useful for a bridge (merely a requirement for the nomination form).
  • Niagara, I know this little bit of information is a bit superfluous and we could do without, but I included it for spatial context, even though it doesn't really provide additional information of note to the user. I'll keep it in for now, but of course I wouldn't mind taking it out if need be. -- West Virginian (talk) 01:24, 11 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • I note that you use extensively {{Harvnb}} for shortening footnotes; {{Sfn}} accomplishes the same, but without needing <ref> tags. Not a big deal, but it might make things easier for you.

Hope that helps... Niagara ​​Don't give up the ship 00:03, 6 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Niagara, thank you for taking the time to engage in this review and share your thoughtful guidance. I will be addressing your comments and suggestions sometime in the next 48 hours. Thanks again and let me know if you have any questions or concerns in the meantime! -- West Virginian (talk) 23:51, 6 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Niagara, I've incorporated or addressed all your much welcomed suggestions, and thank you again for taking the time to peer review this article. Because of your efforts, this article is definitely better suited for a Featured Article candidacy! Please take another look and let me know if you have any further comments or suggestions! -- West Virginian (talk) 01:32, 11 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Looks good! The only other that I've noticed is that all of your images are right-aligned; you might want to left-align a few to make it more visually "interesting". Niagara ​​Don't give up the ship 20:50, 11 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Niagara, thank you for the suggestion! I've reorganized the images so that they are interspersed between the left and right sides. Also, thank you for your edits to the info box. All your efforts here are greatly appreciated! -- West Virginian (talk) 22:45, 11 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from RO

[edit]
Lead
  • The first sentence is grammatically correct, but a doozy. It would be better to break it up.
  • The Capon Lake Whipple Truss Bridge is the oldest remaining example of a Whipple truss bridge in West Virginia
It would be better to state this after informing the reader what a Whipple bridge is.
Per your guidance, I've moved this sentence to the end of the second paragraph introducing the Whipple truss design. -- West Virginian (talk) 01:37, 30 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • horizontal cords
Is there a good Wikilink for this, because casual readers might not know this term.
I've actually re-rendered this as "chord" and wiki-linked it to Truss, since chords are described in the article's lede. -- West Virginian (talk) 01:37, 30 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • or alternatively, the Romney Bridge
Was it officially named the Romney Bridge, or was this title informal?
This was an informal title as the bridge was located immediately west of Romney, West Virginia -- West Virginian (talk) 01:37, 30 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • In 1937, the 1874 bridge was dismantled and relocated to Capon Lake
No need to remind us that it was built in 1874.
Removed. -- West Virginian (talk) 01:37, 30 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Geography and setting
  • a steel stringer bridge
Can we link this please?
A steel stringer bridge is a synonym for or type of Girder bridge. I've kept "steel stringer" and I've wiki-linked it to Girder bridge. -- West Virginian (talk) 01:37, 30 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • The second paragraph is more general, and it might be better as the first paragraph of this section.
Architecture
  • the innovations are evident in the bridge's double-intersection diagonals and counter-diagonals with pin connections
Maybe this is inescapable, but this comes off a little too jargony.
I'm afraid there is not away around this one; as this is about as simplified as I could make it. The bridge has wrought iron spans, some with double intersections and they are arranged diagonally and counter-diagonally. I'm not an engineer, so this part of the article was a bit challenging for me to construct. I'll continue to play with the wording to see if I can make it less jargony in the meantime. -- West Virginian (talk) 01:37, 30 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Whipple truss development
  • wrought iron
Wikilink
Done! -- West Virginian (talk) 01:37, 30 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • This is a nice section. It's a little technical, but overall it's well-presented.
T. B. White and Sons
  • Maybe it's a nitpick, but I found it odd that his sons are not mentioned in the section.
South Branch Bridge
  • South Branch Bridge (or the Romney Bridge),
You should explain why Romney Bridge is an alternate name.
I do mention at the end of the sentence that the bridge is 0.57 miles (0.92 km) west of Romney to draw a connection between the alternative name and Romney. Anecdotally, growing up in Romney, I am used to calling the current bridge "Romney Bridge" just because it's outside town, and the only bridge in Romney, and I assume that is why it was called that as far back as 1874. Would it help if I tack onto the end of that sentence: "west of Romney, the bridge's alternative namesake."? -- West Virginian (talk) 01:37, 30 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • Prior to the construction of the covered bridge in 1838, a public ferry conveyed traffic across the river. Isaac Parsons (1752–1796) operated a ferry there following an act of the Virginia General Assembly establishing the ferry in October 1786.[21][22]
Rewrite this to avoid using "ferry" three times.
Thank you for the suggestion! I've removed the third mention of ferry. -- West Virginian (talk) 01:37, 30 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • Hampshire County citizens called a mass meeting
Drop "mass".
Done! -- West Virginian (talk) 01:37, 30 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • but was "healing well" following the accident
Paraphrase this so you don't have to include this quote.
I've re-rendered the sentence as: "During the course of construction, John Ridenour lost a finger while working on the bridge and according to the South Branch Intelligencer, his wound was healing well following the accident." Hopefully reusing the term "healing well" out of quotes won't warrant a copyvio as there are only so many ways in the English language of stating this. -- West Virginian (talk) 01:37, 30 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "[t]he contractors, Messrs. White & Sons, New Brighton
You can drop the brackets, as typographical conformity allows for this kind of silent, minimal change.
Done! -- West Virginian (talk) 01:37, 30 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • I see the Romney connection is explained, but it should either come earlier, or refrain from calling it that until it's clear why.
Capon Lake Bridge
  • This is a good section, but I wouldn't end with a quote from the marker. You need to sandwich quotes between lines of prose, so move it up slightly if possible.
  • RO, thank you for your kind words! I know it looks a bit out of place here, but I wanted to keep that section in chronological order, and the marker was placed there in 2012 after the bridge received its NRHP listing. Would this be a deal breaker to keep it this way? I concur that it would look better sandwiched between prose, too. -- West Virginian (talk) 01:37, 30 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Conclusion

This is a nice piece overall. Most of my concerns are pretty minor. Explain the Romney connection sooner, or stop telling us the alternate name until it makes sense. Places are a little technical, but not overly so. Still, if you can make this a touch easier to understand for casual readers do so. Nicely done; keep up the great work! RO(talk) 19:11, 29 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

  • Rationalobserver, first and foremost, I would like to thank you for taking the time to engage in this peer review! As I mentioned above, this was a challenging article to compose because of the multiple historical backgrounds (introducing the bridge, the truss design evolution, and the builder) and the structural engineering lingo. Thank you for your kind and encouraging words, and thoughtful guidance. I've made most of the changes you suggested, so please take a look and let me know if you see any other items that need to be addressed. Again, I really appreciate and value your review and feedback! Also, both sentences introducing Romney Bridge as an alternative name also mention the bridge's proximity to Romney in the same sentence. I'm not sure how else to draw a connection between the two. Thanks again and thank you for all your continued contributions to Wikipedia! -- West Virginian (talk) 01:37, 30 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]