Wikipedia:Peer review/Blade Runner (1997 video game)/archive1
- A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style; it can be found on the automated peer review page for June 2008.
This peer review discussion has been closed.
I have changed the article around a bit in the past month - re-organised the sections, added a Reception section, references and images. I am now looking for outside opinion (from gamers and non-gamers) on the article and for ways to improve it further.
Thanks, Nreive (talk) 11:04, 2 June 2008 (UTC)
Ruhrfisch comments: I have not played the game although I have seen the movie. I found this to be an interesting article While it is clear that a lot of work has been put into it, some more is needed to improve it further. Here are some suggestions for improvement:
- A model article is useful for ideas - I note that there are 89 FAs at Category:FA-Class video game articles
- Make sure that the lead is an accessible and inviting overview of the whole article - my rule of thumb is to include every header in the lead in some way. For example Minor charaters and Film references seem to be under-representred in the lead. Please see WP:LEAD
- Provide context for the reader who has not seen the film or played the game. Although some terms are linked, a breif explanation (even a word or pharase) is helpful. For example, McCoy is given the task of tracking down a group of replicants who have killed real-live animals ... - explain what replicants are, or skimmers elesewhere, or even adding two words here: It is during this face-off that Guzza is wounded by [the replicant] Sadik's pulse rifle, and the decision as to what to do with him (the player can either run off from the scene or perform a coup de grace on the lieutenant).
- Article could use a copyedit - the previous sentence could be rewritten to something like Guzza is wounded during this face-off by the replicant Sadik's pulse rifle, and the the player must decide to either run away or perform a coup de grace on the lieutenant.
- Avoid needless repetition - the Minor characters makes many references to the film, Development mentions actors returning to reprise their film roles, and then there is a whole Film references section later which repeats some of this yet again. Could these be combined somehow?
- The Game play section reads too much like a how to manual in places - this is an article about the game, not how to play it. Is the level of detail in To travel to and from crime scenes, the player has to use McCoy's Spinner, which can be accessed by walking up to it, placing the mouse pointer over the door and, when the pointer changes shape, clicking the left mouse button to enter the vehicle. really needed? Look at model articles for ideas.
- Make sure refs are to reliable sources - imdb is often not seen as reliable. Also about half of the refs are to the game's manual - where possible, could these be replaced with thrid party refs? See WP:RS
- Make sure the plot is told from an out of universe perspective - also do not assume everyone will have seen the film (as great as it is). See WP:IN-U
- In recption would it be possible to include information on sales?
- Please use my examples as just that - these are not an exhaustive list and if one example is given, please check to make sure there are not other occurrences of the same problem.
Hope this helps. If my comments are useful, please consider peer reviewing an article, especially one at Wikipedia:Peer review/backlog (which is how I found this article). Yours, Ruhrfisch ><>°° 20:26, 9 June 2008 (UTC)
- Thanks for the comments. I have made some adjustments to the article. I agree that it will need a copyedit and I will place a copyedit request, if I can't manage it myself. As for the sales of the game, I believe that it didn't do too well, but without a source I can't say. None of the sources that are available mention the sales. I might have to scour some old magazine sources for this. Nreive (talk) 10:15, 10 June 2008 (UTC)