Wikipedia:Featured list candidates/List of Jericho episodes/archive2
- The following is an archived discussion of a featured list nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured list candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.
The list was not promoted by The Rambling Man 20:18, 10 October 2009 [1].
- Nominator(s): NW (Talk) 02:26, 18 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- Featured list candidates/List of Jericho episodes/archive1
- Featured list candidates/List of Jericho episodes/archive2
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I worked on this article over the past spring, and intended to featured status one day. For some reason that I can't really remember, I never really brought it through the process, and instead let it sit there. Staxringold and I were talking about FLCs earlier today, and he encouraged me to nominate the article, so I figured I might as well. So, what do you guys think? NW (Talk) 02:26, 18 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Resolved comments from Diaa
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Comments
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- I think I managed to cover all of your points, Diaa abelmoneim. NW (Talk) 19:47, 19 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- I guess that's all I can see for now. I really hate this original and archived links. There should be a switch like dead=true would make it look like it looks now and dead=false means only the original link should be displayed. I'll wait a day or two then support. Maybe I'll find something while reading through the episode summaries. I suggest you read the read a couple of times and see if you can improve it in any way, then move on to read the episode summaries since most FLCs episode summaries contain grammar and spelling mistakes.--Diaa abdelmoneim (talk) 21:19, 19 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- " However, he leaves" Is the "however" really needed there?--Diaa abdelmoneim (talk) 15:40, 25 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- "As he is driving away" "while" ?--Diaa abdelmoneim (talk) 15:40, 25 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- "The episode opens with Robert Hawkins, clad in an Hazmat suit" "Robert Hawkins is clad in a Hazmat suit"--Diaa abdelmoneim (talk) 15:40, 25 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- "Goetz, a Ravenwood unit leader, commandeers gasoline from Stanley's farm." reword (truck, bottles what??)--Diaa abdelmoneim (talk) 15:40, 25 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- I think I addressed all four concerns there. NW (Talk) 15:56, 25 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- "Gray Anderson, later revealed as having left the heart attack victim to die, publicly challenges Mayor Green, who in return privately attacks him." is the event important enough to be in the summary?--Diaa abdelmoneim (talk) 16:15, 25 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- "Robert Hawkins is clad in an Hazmat suit, moving a large metal canister and other items from a small moving truck into a storage locker." why is this important event in the episode?--Diaa abdelmoneim (talk) 16:15, 25 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- "The town holds a cookout and the Hawkins family wishes to attend, but Robert Hawkins will not let them do so. " why is that important?--Diaa abdelmoneim (talk) 16:15, 25 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- "When Jake leaves, Miller tells Hawkins of an unidentified traitor " I think "about" would be better.--Diaa abdelmoneim (talk) 16:15, 25 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- Type out ICBM the first time their mentioned.--Diaa abdelmoneim (talk) 16:15, 25 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- Try to reduce the summaries to the bare minimum, since they have their own articles. I think 4 lines should be a maximum... --Diaa abdelmoneim (talk) 16:15, 25 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Neutral from Dabomb87 (talk · contribs) I can't support with a good conscience right now because I think the prose is at best undistinguished. You've probably had at least one copy-editor for this list, but I must regretfully say that it needs more polishing. Spot checks of the summaries revealed logic errors, awkward sentence structure, and general wordiness. I do think the writing is saveable in the timeframe of FLC if you can find someone to polish it, which is why I am neutral right now. I have a few questions about things I encountered in my spot checks:
- Why is "Morse Code" capitalized?
- "faint news report" How is a news report "faint"?
- "Jonah attempts to drive a wedge between Jake and the townspeople before leaving." What do you mean by "drive a wedge"? Dabomb87 (talk) 23:38, 28 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.