Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Joseph W. Tkach
This article has achieved GA, has gone through general Peer Review, and has achieved A-class in the Biography wikiproject. The comments from all three review boards have been implemented and additional improvements have been made by two anonymous editors. I submit it now as a FAC and I welcome your comments. RelHistBuff 10:59, 7 November 2006 (UTC)
- Comments Overall, well written and well cited.
- An incident changed him. Very short sentence that chops up the flow of that paragraph. Is there a better way to transition?
- and he found himself miraculously cured. I'm not sure if I'm entirely comfortable with "miraculously" there...some readers might be led to think the article is stating that his cure was indeed a religious miracle. But that's just me.
- Commas are a bit inconsistent: "In 1966 Tkach moved..." and "In March 1981, Armstrong appointed him". I'm a fan of commas, so I'd suggest putting them in like the latter example whenever you have a similar construct, but that's a stylistic preference.
- In the late 1970s a period of disputes occurred... Disputes over what?
- Since he was an American, I would suggest using American spellings. I saw "characterised", "baptised", "recognised", and "authorised". There may be others.
- he was to eventually have split infinitive
- wikilink "disfellowshipped", "Mosaic Law", "dietary laws"
- the acceptance of the validity of other Christian denominations;[20] etc.. "etc." usually means the reader can infer what the rest of the list looks like. Not the case here though.
- current Pastor General of the WCG Be careful when using "current". "Pastor General of the WCG as of 2006" may be better.
Gzkn 13:02, 7 November 2006 (UTC)
- Thanks for your comments. I agreed with and implemented almost all of them. The prose comments were very helpful and I believe it flows better now. I clarified the type of disputes (leadership and financial), but I didn't add the details. I assume the reader can read more on that in the Stanley Rader article. I removed the whole clause current Pastor General of the WCG as the reader has already been introduced to Tkach Jr. and there is already an article on him. The footnote gives the source which is Tkach Jr.'s book. The only comment I hesitated on was the implemention of commas on introductory elements such as In 1966,. For some reason, it looked a little strange to me. I checked on some other manuals of style and it seems that for short elements that are non-ambiguous, the comma is optional. If the element tends to be long (one manual said more than five words), then a comma should be used. So what I did was to remove commas after short introductory elements, i.e., the ones with years and dates. However, I kept the commas for longer introductory elements such as In assessing the work of Tkach,. RelHistBuff 14:40, 7 November 2006 (UTC)
- Looks good. You have my support. Gzkn 00:42, 8 November 2006 (UTC)
- Thanks for your comments. I agreed with and implemented almost all of them. The prose comments were very helpful and I believe it flows better now. I clarified the type of disputes (leadership and financial), but I didn't add the details. I assume the reader can read more on that in the Stanley Rader article. I removed the whole clause current Pastor General of the WCG as the reader has already been introduced to Tkach Jr. and there is already an article on him. The footnote gives the source which is Tkach Jr.'s book. The only comment I hesitated on was the implemention of commas on introductory elements such as In 1966,. For some reason, it looked a little strange to me. I checked on some other manuals of style and it seems that for short elements that are non-ambiguous, the comma is optional. If the element tends to be long (one manual said more than five words), then a comma should be used. So what I did was to remove commas after short introductory elements, i.e., the ones with years and dates. However, I kept the commas for longer introductory elements such as In assessing the work of Tkach,. RelHistBuff 14:40, 7 November 2006 (UTC)
- Support. Per my comments in the Bio peer-review.--Yannismarou 08:30, 9 November 2006 (UTC)
- Support I saw this article in Peer Review and I appreciate the NPOV tone of this controversial figure and like the way the article strings together a broad portrait of the subject. Agne 23:28, 27 November 2006 (UTC)
- Support I've seen the article grow and omprove over the last few weeks/months. I added a few categories. There may be additional ones available. On a side note, about 2-3 years ago someone I knew had mentioned the WCG and wondered "where did it go"? If this article were available then it would have been easy to tell him. Mfields1 00:02, 28 November 2006 (UTC)