User talk:Skumar25/sandbox

Great job organizing the signs and symptoms section, nice use of linkage to explain bullets.
Try adding a couple hallmark features or key characteristics in the abstract section.
Is there any information that describes how the life of a person with this condition is affected? Or if their symptoms progressively worsen over time? If so, maybe this information could go under the prognosis section.
Is it possible to elaborate on the significance of the two important arteries passing through the CCJ? Or explain how it relates to the cause of the condition?

Thank you for your feedback. I think you made some great suggestions for improvement. I will modify my work. --Skumar25 (talk) 03:56, 15 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Abstract could use a little more info.
I would like to see some specific genetic cause options in the causes section.
Mechanism could use some elaboration on the nerve issues. Also, the first sentence isn't exactly accurate, given what you say later. Try rephrasing.
I really like how thoroughly you included links to other pages.
Prognosis varies with the cause, but there is information out there. Use it.
Involuntary eye movement seems like it belongs in symptoms, not diagnosis.
Mechanism: I know there's a variety, but I'd like to hear about some of them. Maybe subheadings for genetic, trauma, and other or something and talk a little about each.
This isn't an appropriate approach for epidemiology. It's going to differ by causes. Talk a little about it from that perspective.
The fact that there are many causes doesn't mean you shouldn't talk about any of them! Talk about the range, talk about categories. Use the information that's out there!
Look at other articles to better understand how to discuss the recent research.
Don't state opinions about what needs to be done.
There is a bunch of research out there. You should have at least three articles.

review

Thank you for your feedback Dr. Weiner. I will modify my work, do more research and add more. --Skumar25 (talk) 03:56, 15 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Try to hyperlink relevant information. Like instead of pathophysiology just add imagery to the section
try not offer "suggestions" but rather facts
maybe talk about any notable mentions or potential research that looks promising
Overall the subject is great and you are trying to make the connections

Thank you for your feedback. I think you made some great suggestions for improvement. I will modify my work. --Skumar25 (talk) 03:56, 15 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]