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User talk:Cwhitmore84

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Feedback on CRPBIS

[edit]

Hi, I'm the content expert for your class and your instructor asked me to give you some feedback. Before I start, I will say that I have removed the content for a few reasons, which I'll go into below.

My first concern was that you are discussing something different from what the parent article CRPBIS discusses. That article is about the Culturally Responsive Positive Behavior Interventions and Supports project, while your section appears to cover a different thing, Positive Behavior Interventions and Supports. There are two different websites for each as well, CRPBIS and PBIS. They also appear to be run by different organizations and operate on different levels - PBIS is run by the National Technical Assistance Center on Positive Behavioral Interventions and Supports and operates on the national level, while CRPBIS is run by the Wisconsin Center for Education Research and appears to cover only four schools (likely all within the state of Wisconsin). While the two do seem to be very similar, it's not really appropriate to put both of them in the same article since they're considered two separate things that work in the same area of education and as such, would be considered two different topics entirely. I also noted that occasionally you switched between CRPBIS and PBIS, so be careful that you're referring to just one of the two. It would be a good idea, while you're going over your sandbox article, that you make sure that your research only covers CRPBIS, if that's the project you want to write about.

Thirdly, the content was written like a literature review, which is considered to be an academic paper style rather than the encyclopedic style used on Wikipedia. You will need to re-write this in order to make it fit Wikipedia's WP:MoS. I've done a little tweaking in your sandbox to help with this, mostly just re-naming the section titles and removing the abstract, which we don't use in Wikipedia articles.

Other than those issues it does appear that you have a good start here - you just need to edit it so it more greatly resembles a Wikipedia article and so that it only covers one topic. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 05:29, 3 May 2017 (UTC)[reply]