User talk:Cakingry/sandbox

Topic Peer Review 1

In the first sentence a rephrasing that is more analytical would be helpful. Stating "Studies show..." could be useful. Potentially adding limitations and criticisms to either section (use existing resources). I'm really just curious, when you say low-income families, are those the only families receiving these services? The citation style needs to be redone, ours can be used as an example for this. Also, Emily's sources need to be added to the Child Care section. Obviously, a graphic is still needed and the 2 sections with subsections have been discussed with Desmond Patton as sufficient to fulfill the 3 section criteria. Mephilton (talk)

I really like the quality of the examples you used throughout this article. When you add the sources to the final section, you might want to look at the voice used and add some "studies suggest", "according to..." or things like that to make it less subjective. I'm sure that will sort itself out when the citations are added to that section but I'd imagine the 'wiki-bots' might appreciate it. Mgs6876 (talk)