User talk:Azg717

This user is a student editor in Yale_College/Science_and_Politics_of_Cancer_(Spring,_2018) .

Welcome!

Hello, Azg717, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Ian and I work with the Wiki Education Foundation; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.

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If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 21:00, 1 February 2018 (UTC)[reply]

COPYVIO

Your sandbox was copied from High-dose chemotherapy and bone marrow transplant. That article seems to have directly copied content from copyrighted journal articles, so I recommend you run the CVDetector for that. Chris Troutman (talk) 21:20, 11 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Feedback

Hi. Is this the section you want feedback on: User:Azg717/sandbox#Draft_High-dose_chemotherapy_and_bone_marrow_transplant_for_other_cancers?

My first thought is sourcing. Bear in mind that biomedical information on Wikipedia is subject to special sourcing requirements. You should be using review articles that are less than five years old, not websites.

Your paragraph is too long and too dense. Break it up a bit to make it more readable. Make sure that terms the average reader might not know are linked. And avoid terms like "patients". Doctors writing for doctors talk about "the patient". Talk about "people" instead - it makes it more readable, less remote. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 17:16, 13 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]

This treatment was used primarily for advanced breast cancer. You need to make that more clear. It did derive from the transplant for leukemia developed by Thomas but you need to point out that transition. As a result your first paragraph is a bit confusing RJBazell (talk) 16:58, 8 April 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Peer Feedback

This looks like a good draft! The material added in regards to the legal side of the issue was really interesting. A couple things to note: - the use of "Dr." is not allowed - Instead of saying "people" in the beginning of the "Ligation" section, perhaps, "several cancer advocacy groups..." Xyz789abc123 (talk) 14:33, 3 April 2018 (UTC)[reply]