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User talk:Aquinnah.fox/sandbox

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  Comments: Careful about passive constructions and long sentences that can be more clear and succinct. For example, the third sentence. Instead of saying, He is believed to have learned his trade from his father, about whom little other than his name, Bicci, is known, you could say something like, "All we know about Lorenzo's father is his name, Bicci, and that his trade was in painting, both of which he bestowed upon his son." This is not necessarily what you should say, but the sentence you have now is confusing and difficult to follow. In the following sentence you could also instead say, "Lorenzo's style, as well as the style of his contemporaries Jacopo di Cione and Nicole di Pietro Gerini, was influenced by the artist Andrea di Cione." Also, who are Bicci di Lorenzo and Neri di Bicci? Are they related to him or are they other people? Are there wikipedia pages you can link their names to?

I know there isn't a ton of information on him, but maybe try to either expand the "early life and training" section, or combine the section with "early career" and make subsections within the larger section (does that make sense?).

Also I would start linking anything you can to their respective wikipedia pages, like Giorgio Vasari.

Start adding media/pictures of his paintings into the article, too.

Besides those things, the article looks good so far! You use a neutral point of view which is good, and for the most part the information is very clear. Try to find some more sources, but I know there is very little information on him. Maybe instead of this, try to find more information on other things that relate to him, such as his contemporaries, or Vasari, or his father, or workshop... Secondary sources that have to do with these things might have some hidden information about Lorenzo di Bicci hidden in there somewhere -- that's how I found a lot of the information on my guy!

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