User:Shnib

Shnib's Userboxen

This user is owned by one or more cats.

This user uses Google as a primary search engine.

This user contributes using Microsoft Windows XP.

This user is a Harry Potter fan.

This user knows
The Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything.

This user contributes using Firefox.

fan-1

This user enjoys the film Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone.

a²+b²=c²

This user is an intermediate mathematician.

met?

This user prefers metric units, but, having grown up in the United States, cannot relate to them.

0.{\bar {9}}

=1

This user knows that 0.999... is exactly 1, but acquired a migraine learning it.

C&H

This user reads Calvin and Hobbes.

This user enjoys comics.

This user has a television set.

This user enjoys Classical music.

This user loves the Summer.

This user is happy.

Encyclobox

This is an Encyclobox.

This user enjoys the big band sound

This user enjoys jazz music.

This user enjoys straight-ahead jazz.

This user is car-free.^‡

This user begrudgingly observes Daylight Saving Time.

This user loves to write.

Hello. I am shnib. I am a person. I am not an alien. Chicken's can't fly. Cows are relitively dumb. Below is more stuff, some of which is completely random.

Contributions

Death

In ultimate peril, facing death once and for all, one does not truly understand their life, in that moment, but mentally numbs so that the coldness of death does not grip one terribly, but peacefully. Death is an ultimate shock, and in the moment that it shocks you, you do not believe it will happen, nor realize that it is happening. The darkness is the darkness of natural pain, but in that moment of terror, of not understanding but simply knowing, your reality is frozen so that it cannot be thawed. Your mind has no time to realize the truth. It is an instantaneous passing between the living world and the dead world, a reversible passage until the fatal moment when it is complete.

The Heaven Dilemma

Bob, Joe, and Fred all went to heaven. Bob said, “I want to be in heaven.” He got thrown out of Heaven for being greedy, but Hell wouldn’t accept him because he wasn’t greedy enough. So he was torn in half, and half went to Heaven and half went to Hell. But it’s hard not to die when you’re torn in half. So Bob died, but he couldn’t go to Heaven or Hell, so he was torn in half over and over until the paragraph about him ended.

Joe, Fred and Bob went to Heaven. After Bob’s paragraph, Joe said, “I want to go to Hell.” St. Billy thought he was serious, so Joe went to Hell. Then he said, “I was only saying that to be humble so I could go to Heaven.” Heaven kept him in Hell because he was greedy for wanting to go to Heaven.

Fred, Bob, and Joe went to Heaven. After the first two paragraphs, it was Fred’s turn. After seeing what the other two had done, he didn’t say anything. He was let in and lived a happy death in Heaven.

Seal in a Tree

One day I sat and ate my lunch,
Or could be breakfast, maybe brunch.
I’m not quite sure; it’s been so long,
But anyway, let’s get on with the song.

So there I ate my morning meal,
And was about to dispose of a moldy orange peel,
When I saw a seal in a tree.
That’s something you don’t often see.

As you can imagine, I was quite surprised,
So surprised that I promptly died.