Jump to content

User:Peinini/Genocide justification/Amacalus Peer Review

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

General info

[edit]
Whose work are you reviewing?

Peinini

Link to draft you're reviewing
https://wiki.riteme.site/wiki/User:Peinini/Genocide_justification?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
Genocide justification

Evaluate the drafted changes

[edit]

(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Conciseness

[edit]

I believe some of the phrasing of sentences could be more concise, or split into separate sentences. Even some of the verbage is a bit difficult to read. For instance the sentence, "Justification and rationalization are common with regard to the Armenian genocide, as the perpetrators portrayed the killings as legitimate defense against Armenians, who were perceived as traitors and colluding with Russia during a time of war." It's long with many cases and viewpoints and topics introduced. Splitting it into two or three sentences introducing each idea separately would help with readability.

Everything provided relates to the article. I understand this is about genocide justification so it's on why these people believe it's justified, but I think including both sides of the coin may be helpful in understanding the matter, as reasoning behind genocide is incredibly multi-faceted.

Sources

[edit]

I already see discussion of including more examples such as the Holocaust, Rwandan genocide and Bosnian genocide. I think this is a good track to include more viewpoints across different cultures and historical events. For the existing Armenian genocide there are two quotes cited which is quite long, to prevent copyright summarizing the viewpoints may be more beneficial than the quote. Or including an afterwards would also be helpful. It's difficult to understand what the quotes mean without extra analysis.