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User:Maddi Haraway/Sahachiro Hata/Reka.nagykaldi Peer Review

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General info

[edit]
Whose work are you reviewing?

Maddi Haraway

Link to draft you're reviewing
User:Maddi Haraway/Sahachiro Hata
Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
Sahachiro Hata

Evaluate the drafted changes

[edit]

I really like how much more informaton you were able to add. On top of that, you remained very neutral, only providing factual information. Also, you added structure to the page, making it easier to find certain information based on your added headings. You did use some strong language in your "Magic bullet" section, but that was from the source; as long as it doesn't take away from the actual integrity of Hata's opinions then that is totally ok. One thing I think you may add back that was in the original is a short, introductory couple of sentences to set up your information. Overall, very great work!