User:Chimericmacandcheese/I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream/WillKBeatty Peer Review

Peer review

Complete your peer review exercise below, providing as much constructive criticism as possible. The more detailed suggestions you provide, the more useful it will be to your classmate. Make sure you consider each of the following aspects:

Lead

Guiding questions:

Has the Lead been updated to reflect the new content added by your peer?
Does the Lead include an introductory sentence that concisely and clearly describes the article's topic?
Does the Lead include a brief description of the article's major sections?
Does the Lead include information that is not present in the article?
Is the Lead concise or is it overly detailed?

Content

Guiding questions:

Is the content added relevant to the topic?
Is the content added up-to-date?
Is there content that is missing or content that does not belong?
Does the article deal with one of Wikipedia's equity gaps? Does it address topics related to historically underrepresented populations or topics?

Tone and Balance

Guiding questions:

Is the content added neutral?
Are there any claims that appear heavily biased toward a particular position?
Are there viewpoints that are overrepresented, or underrepresented?
Does the content added attempt to persuade the reader in favor of one position or away from another?

Sources and References

Guiding questions:

Is all new content backed up by a reliable secondary source of information?
Does the content accurately reflect what the cited sources say? (You'll need to refer to the sources to check this.)
Are the sources thorough - i.e. Do they reflect the available literature on the topic?
Are the sources current?
Are the sources written by a diverse spectrum of authors? Do they include historically marginalized individuals where possible?
Are there better sources available, such as peer-reviewed articles in place of news coverage or random websites? (You may need to do some digging to answer this.)
Check a few links. Do they work?

Organization

Guiding questions:

Is the content added well-written - i.e. Is it concise, clear, and easy to read?
Does the content added have any grammatical or spelling errors?
Is the content added well-organized - i.e. broken down into sections that reflect the major points of the topic?

Images and Media

Guiding questions: If your peer added images or media

Does the article include images that enhance understanding of the topic?
Are images well-captioned?
Do all images adhere to Wikipedia's copyright regulations?
Are the images laid out in a visually appealing way?

For New Articles Only

If the draft you're reviewing is for a new article, consider the following in addition to the above.

Does the article meet Wikipedia's Notability requirements - i.e. Is the article supported by 2-3 reliable secondary sources independent of the subject?
How exhaustive is the list of sources? Does it accurately represent all available literature on the subject?
Does the article follow the patterns of other similar articles - i.e. contain any necessary infoboxes, section headings, and any other features contained within similar articles?
Does the article link to other articles so it is more discoverable?

Overall impressions

Guiding questions:

Has the content added improved the overall quality of the article - i.e. Is the article more complete?
What are the strengths of the content added?
How can the content added be improved?

Examples of good feedback

A good article evaluation can take a number of forms. The most essential things are to clearly identify the biggest shortcomings, and provide specific guidance on how the article can be improved.

Peer review of "Homemaking"
Peer review of this article about a famous painting

Additional Resources

Check out the Editing Wikipedia PDF for general editing tips and suggestions.

General info

Whose work are you reviewing?

Chimericmacandcheese

Link to draft you're reviewing: User:Chimericmacandcheese/sandbox; User:Chimericmacandcheese/I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream
Link to the current version of the article (if it exists): I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream

Evaluate the drafted changes

I find your work on the lead to be helpful, but the sentence 'The story is one of Ellison's more shocking works, with themes concerning technological advancements gone wrong and Hell on Earth. feels opinionated, and doesn't seem to fit unless you can find a source which backs up that claim.

Your editions to the Background section are great, and you've also properly formatted the link which is very important.

The statement you make within Plot' of 'It finally refers to itself as purely "AM," referring to the phrase "I think, therefore I am." is interesting information which is not found elsewhere in the article, which points to good research. The final sentence you've added of "...It wants nothing more than to exact revenge on humanity by torturing the last remnants of the species that created it, being Ted and the others." leaves something to be wanting. The current description of plot ends succinctly on "I have no mouth. And I must scream." which is a good way to end the summary, which leaves the sentence you've added feeling disjointed and unnecessary from this section. I would recommend maybe re-writing it so it ends on a more definitive note, or scrapping it instead.

Your edition of an entire new section, being Influences/Themes is incredibly useful and is a huge edition to the article. The biggest issue you may run into with this section though is sourcing and opinion. Wikipedia has a rule about No Original Research, so everything you say MUST be coming from some other person. You've done a good job of citation so far, I would just make sure that every claim you make is backed up with research you've found.

Besides what I've written above, my only advice would be for you to move this out of your User:Chimericmacandcheese/sandbox and instead to the specific drafting sandbox relevant to your article. Your personal sandbox is intended more for your own experimentation, such as how to code, personal thoughts, etc. User:Chimericmacandcheese/I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream is where you should ideally have all of this drafting work, as it is what WikiEdu links to, and is also much easier to format/export once you want to go live with your article.

Thanks, WillKBeatty (talk) 20:22, 17 April 2021 (UTC)