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Shrek V Book opens, revealing photo album. Time in a bottle plays. Shrek takes photo out*

Shrek -“And this was when the kids graduated from Worcestershire” Fiona-“Aww the boys look so handsome, and Felicia is so pretty. And here’s a picture of my mother, oh how i miss her.” 

Shrek-"i know honey. i know.” *Triplets, now in their twenties, enter holding gifts* Triplets-"happy fathers day!" Shrek- "Aw thanks kids. look what your mother got me." *He holds up the photo album. He then removes a different photo* shrek-"this is from donkey's birthday" Fiona-“Speaking of which”

*A wounded Dragon crashes in front of the swamp and Puss and Donkey slowly get up* 

Shrek-“Donkey? Are you alright? What happened?” Donkey-“Shrek, we were ambushed. Near the old fortress.” Shrek-“Ambushed? By who?” Puss-“We don’t know, but they shot dragon and tried to kill us” Donkey-“Anyway, Shrek, hop on, we gotta take a look” Fiona-“Is Dragon really fit to fly, she looks pretty injured?”

  • Dragon growls*

Fiona-“Well if you say so, but I’ll have to patch you up first”

  • Fiona finishes tying a bandage around dragon’s wing root*

Fiona-“There. Now you’re sure you’re all right?”

  • Dragon growls again*

Donkey-“come on, we ain’t got much time”

  • Shrek, Fiona, Donkey and Puss remount Dragon And she immediately takes off*
  • A colossal army marches through the forrest, flying a mysterious banner. Two cloaked figures stand on a stone balcony, watching as more soldiers march through the gates of an abandoned Duloc. Thelonious the executioner opens the door leading to the balcony* Thelonious-“My Lords, it’s ready”
  • One of the figures laughs and they both follow Thelonious inside*
  • Dragon circles and lands on a hill overlooking Duloc and Shrek and co dismount*

Donkey-“Look Shrek, something’s definitely going on over there” *Shrek points to duloc* Shrek-“is that..?” Fiona-“Farquaad’s castle”

  • Thelonious leads the two cloaked figures into a large dungeon with a pit of black oil in the floor. Soldiers march out of the pit in perfect unison, followed by a large, brown wolf-like creature that leaps out of the oil pit. The other figure chuckles*

Figure one-“it’s magnificent! With this weapon we can finally take our rightful place as kings of men! Where are the prisoners?”

  • Thelonious opens a wooden door, behind which are three more figures with sacks on their heads and their hands bound*

Figure two-“One of you three has the design for a king’s weapon, a blade of fire that could unite mankind under a single flag.”

  • Figure one snaps his fingers and the wolf walks in and begins sniffing at each of the prisoners. It takes a long sniff at one of the prisoners before turning to the two cloaked men. Figure two chuckles*

Figure two-“Thelonious...”

  • Thelonious takes an axe that was resting on the wall and beheads one of the prisoners*

Prisoner one-“I’ll never tell you anything!”

  • Thelonious raises the axe above his head, ready to strike*

Prisoner two-“Wait, I’ll tell you. Do you know the muffin man?” Figure two-“the muffin man?” Figure one-“oh I’ve had enough of this”

  • Figure one chokes prisoner two*

Prisoner one-“Who are you?”

  • figure one releases prisoner two*

Figure one-“We were kings. Rulers. As mighty as men could be”

  • The two cloaked figures remove their hoods, revealing figure one to be Lord Farquaad and figure two to be Prince Charming. Charming has an eye missing and Farquaad’s face is half burnt.*

Charming-“Before we were betrayed”

  • Thelonious picks up the axe and beheads both prisoners at once*

Puss-“Señor, where are they going?” Shrek-“They’re marching west” Fiona-“Far Far Away” Donkey-“We need to warn Artie” *They remount. Dragon takes off and heads in the same direction as the soldiers but flying low below the tree line, out of site* Puss-“I thought you said the fortress was abandoned” Shrek-“I thought so too” Dragon lands in a courtyard outside the Far Far Away palace* Donkey-“Oh yeah I love that part”

Shrek and co run through the doors into a grand hall* Artie-“Ah Shrek, Donkey, Puss, long time, no see. Hello Fiona.” shrek-"we need your help" Artie-"*impersonating shrek* we need your help" Fiona-“Arthur, your kingdom is in trouble. There’s an army marching towards us as we speak. They will be upon us within a week.” Artie-“I find that unlikely, but I will give you the benefit of the doubt. Merlin!” *Merlin the wizard enters the room* Merlin-“Yes, my Lord?” Artie-“Does anyone wish to threaten my kingdom?” Merlin pulls out magic dust and casts it into the fire. Cloudy images of Farquaad and charming’s men appear* Merlin-“I’m afraid the ogre is right. There is a force of men marching in from the east. I must advise you to take every precaution to ensure that this fight is not lost.” Artie-“Very well. Evacuate the city. Send the people to our alpine stronghold and treble the guard. Make sure that no one comes into this city without my say-so.” Merlin-“Of course my lord” Shrek-“With all due respect your highness, I do think that we should really be meeting him head on.” Artie-“How dare you tell me how to run my kingdom! Meet him out in the open and be cut down? I think not!” Fiona-“Artie, please it’s our only chance.” Merlin-“She’s right, my Lord.”

  • Artie considers for a moment* Artie-“No. I’m sorry, but I can’t help you. Oh Shrek wait, there’s some people here who want to meet you” Donkey-“damn”
  • A curtain opens and the mice, pigs, wolfie, gingy and pinochio step out* Heimlich the pig-“Shrek! It’s so good to see you, ja”

Shrek-“Alright lads, lets get going” Puss-“Where are we going, Señor?” Shrek-“You’ll see”

  • Shrek knocks on a wooden door. The peep hole opens revealing a cyclops eye. The door opens. Doris, the cyclops and hook are standing behind it.*

Doris-“Hello boys” Puss-“Hello Doris” *They all sit on a banquet table with Shrek facing Doris* Doris-“You’re asking us to fight for you?” Shrek-“I wouldn’t be asking if there was any other way” Hook-“No. we cannot waste or precious resources for some puny squabble! I’m sorry Shrek, but you’re on your own”

  • Shrek and co leave*

Donkey-“Gee, ain’t they a load a fools” Shrek-“it was worth a try” Fiona-“Lets go back to the castle. They could use our help.”

  • Thelonious enters the room* Thelonious-“My Lords, our troops are nearly in position” Farquaad-“good. Get ready to attack at dawn.” Thelonious-“Shall we unleash the beasts?” Charming-“no, not yet. Our men can do it. There shouldn’t be too much opposition.”
  • Shrek, Fiona and Artie watch as their soldiers train. A horn blows in the distance*

Messenger-“My Lord, you have a message”

  • He holds up a scroll and Artie hesitantly takes it and reads it*

Artie-“Thank you.” Shrek-“what does it say?” Artie-“Farquaad has the elder blade” Fiona-“oh no” Shrek-“the elder blade? What’s that?” Artie-“The King’s weapon. A blade of incredible power. If our reports are true, we stand no chance.”

  • Artie walks away*

Shrek-“Arthur...” Artie-“He’s here”

  • The soldiers line up and collect armour and weapons from the armoury*
  • Farquaad and charming’s men reach the gate of Far Far Away away and begin to use a battering ram on it.*

Artie-“We can hold them!” Shrek-“Send out riders my lord. Call for aid.” Artie-“And who will come? England? Spain? No, ogre. We are alone in this fight.” Shrek-“Your people will answer.” Artie-“My people? Where were my people when the westfold fell? Where were my people when our enemies closed in around us? Where were my people...” The gate breaks and Farquaad and charming’s men march into the Far Far Away streets, burning banners and wooden signs as they go.*

Artie-“So much death. What can men do against such reckless hate?” Fiona-“You can fight, we can fight, my Lord.” Shrek-“Ride with me. Ride out and fight” Artie-“for death and glory?” Shrek-“for Far Far Away.” Artie-“yes! Yes! The horn of Harold Frog-Blood will sound in the valley, one last time!” Donkey-“all right, that’s what I’m talking about!”

A deep trumpet sounds as Artie’s men and shrek and co charge through the gate. The banner of Farquaad can be seen flapping above the buildings.* Artie-“Halt!”

  • The men stop suddenly. Artie turns to his men*

Artie-“My brothers, soldiers of Far Far Away. We can stand idly by as our streets and our homes burn in the name of power and glory, or we can fight for justice and freedom and perhaps one day, peace!” Donkey-“all right, aha”

  • Farquaad and charming’s men appear from another street.*

Artie-“We fight to the last man!” Donkey-“Shrek, now might be a really good time for you to get angry.” Shrek-“That’s my secret donkey, I’m always angry”

  • shrek grabs two soldiers and slams them into the ground, then he picks another one up and throws him into the forest. Donkey, Fiona Artie and the rest of Artie’s men and the fairytale creatures charge forward. Farquaad and charming’s men fire a volley of arrows. Some of Artie’s men fall but the rest keep charging*

Thelonious-“Retreat! Retreat to duloc!”

  • Farquaad and charming’s men run away into the forest. Artie’s men cheer.*

Shrek-“this war isn’t over” Fiona-“Return to the castle and regroup. Get ready to take the fight to them”

  • Artie stares at the bodies around him and then into the forest. Fiona puts her hand on his shoulder before walking away towards the castle*
  • Farquaad makes a sword at a forge. He holds it up and smiles. It has a gold hilt with rubies in it and a black-silver blade. Duloc’s gates open and Thelonious and his men wander in, looking tired. Farquaad runs outside.*

Charming-“What happened? You were unstoppable!* Thelonious-“Arthur had help, my Lords. The ogre.” Farquaad-“Impossible. There are no more ogres. We destroyed them all, remember. After I was betrayed” Thelonious-“betrayed, my Lord?”

  • Farquaad turns around and chokes Thelonious*

Farquaad-“I gave him my word. He stole everything I ever wanted. And cast it aside.”

  • Farquaad drops Thelonious and he gasps for air.*
  • In the grand hall in Far Far Away, Artie raises a cup of mead. We can see the setting sun shine through a small window above the throne* Artie-“Tonight, we honour those who gave their lives defending this realm, for at dawn we ride to avenge them!”
  • Everyone cheers and raises their mugs*

Shrek-“Who could be building this army? Not Farquaad, surely, we saw him die” Fiona-“Who else could it be?” Shrek-“I don’t know Fiona, I don’t know”

  • A horn blows as the sun rises and thousands of horses ride out from all streets and converge in the main road, with Shrek and Artie at the front. They endure blistering winds and scorching deserts as a whole day passes before the sun sets*
  • As the sun rises over Duloc, the ground begins to shake as Artie’s men appear on the horizon*

Artie-“If I could lay down my life for my country, I would do so without hesitation, and I know the rest of you would do the same! The price of freedom is high, but it’s a price I’m willing to pay!”

  • farquaad and charming’s men Immediately charge towards Shrek and Artie’s forces. At that same moment, Dragon lands near to where Shrek and donkey are standing. Thunderstruck begins to play*
Dragon-“roar” 
  • The triplets appear* all-"Hi dad!" *the muffin man appears and a giant gingerbread man breaks through the tree line*

Farquaad-*shocked* ”The muffin man” Muffin man-“I heard you needed some assistance, so I brought along my brother too”

  • robin hood and his merry men appear*

Robin Hood-“bonjour, monsiuor” *doris, hook, cyclops and the evil trees appear too* Doris-“Hello boys”

  • the princesses appear*
  • a grown up butterpants appears* butterpants-"Do the roar" Fiona-“morning ladies”
  • The Ogre resistance appears* brogan-“for ogres everywhere”

all of Shrek’s forces charge towards farquaad and charming’s. Shrek punches Thelonious in the face and he flies back and hits a building. Fiona, Doris and the princesses take out a group of soldiers. Mongo 2.0 kicks a bunch of soldiers away. Donkey and dragon burn a bunch of soldiers. Merlin is confronted by several soldiers and stops them by saying,”You shall not pass!” The merry men dance fight a group of soldiers. Donkey bucks and kicks a soldier in the back of the head. Puss sword fights somebody. Shrek forces his way through the crowd and comes face to face with Farquaad and charming* Shrek-“I saw you die. And you. How are you still alive? Farquaad-“No you didn’t. I merely faked my death, as did princey here. We have been plotting against Far Far Away for 20 years, ever since you turned down the throne and *points at Artie* sat a child upon it! Have you ever wondered why you’re the only real ogre left. After you betrayed me, I wiped them out. Was it worth it, Shrek. Now!” The earth begins to shake as a crevice opens up in the floor and a pack of giant wolves run onto the battlefield. Their red eyes stare straight into Shrek’s. Farquaad-“You are alone. Weak. Vulnerable” Brogan-“what makes you think that” The ogre resistance forms up around Shrek* Farquaad-*Shocked* ”You took everything from me! My wife! My kingdom! And my future! And now I shall do the same! The wolves leap at Shrek and he prepares to fight them but they are knocked aside by dragon and donkey.* Donkey-“That’s right, fool, now you’ve definitely seen a donkey fly!”

  • Charming tries to run but is confronted by the princesses.*

Charming-“Ah hello ladies, how do you like me now?”

  • They all kick him in the face and he falls back. the wolves turn to face dragon and they fight each other, trampling charming in the process. Farquaad grimaces. He thrusts with his sword and stabs Shrek in the chest. Shrek falls down* Farquaad-“I am the rightful king!” *Shrek pulls the sword out of his chest*

Shrek-“And I...am...an ogre”

  • he stabs farquaad. Farquaad falls down . Fiona rushes over to Shrek and kneels beside him. Puss and donkey do the same.*
Fiona-“Shrek, I love you” 
  • Shrek slowly turns to face her but doesn’t say anything* Donkey-“Shrek, you can’t die. I need you. *sings* you gotta have friends”
Shrek-*quietly* “that’ll do donkey, that’ll do...” 

Fiona-“leave him be donkey” Puss-“Adios señor”

  • Puss removes his hat. Everyone, including farquaad’s men, kneel and begin to sing All Star in a minor key*
  • Artie watches as his servants hang up a tapestry of Shrek and as the citizens of Far Far Away slowly stream back in through the gate*

Doris sips a pint of green beer with hook and cyclops*

  • Puss returns to his orphanage and hugs mother Imelda.*

The muffin man returns to his bakery and begins kneading dough in silence. He puts it into the oven and the loaf is actually shaped like Shrek*

  • The princesses walk down their street in Far Far Away together in silence and each enter their own homes*
  • the merry men silently enter a small village and proceed to hand out food, water and bags of gold.*

Donkey, dragon, Fiona and the fairytale creatures watch as Shrek’s body is laid down on a longboat, set alight in a spectacular green flame and floated out to sea*

  • All Star fades out. The book closes*