Template:Did you know nominations/Reg Sinclair

The following discussion is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Gilderien Chat|List of good deeds 23:31, 13 December 2013 (UTC)

Reg Sinclair

(

• Back to T:TDYK
• Article history

)

• ... that National Hockey League player Reg Sinclair quit the sport in 1953 after only three seasons to take a job with Pepsi that paid less than a quarter of what he would have made in the NHL?

• Reviewed: Ice Box Chamberlain

Created/expanded by Resolute (talk). Self nominated at 15:55, 8 December 2013 (UTC).

• Article has been expanded from approx 449 characters to over 4,000, which means the expansion requirement. New enough. Hook is interesting and cited to an offline source, for which I will assume good faith. QPQ completed. The only thing which I would note concern over is close paraphrasing of sources.[1] – C679 09:20, 10 December 2013 (UTC)

• Nearly all of that appears to be false positives. i.e.: it stands to reason that "National Hockey League" will exist in both. I did change one instance (Montreal Canadiens oldtimers) after deciding that could be taken as being too closely paraphrased. Thanks, Resolute 15:35, 10 December 2013 (UTC)

• True, I have reviewed the article with that source again and it's now alright. BUT the phrase "caught the attention" from the legends of hockey source should be reworded. One more thing, the part "Detroit acquired Sinclair from the Rangers in a trade on August 18, 1952. The Red Wings sent defenceman Leo Reise, Jr. to New York and also acquired John Morrison and cash." seems to be incomprehensible, it would be better if the two sides of the trade were separated so the reader can understand what each sider gave the other. The Montreal Gazette did a decent job of this, but again watch out it's not too closely paraphrased. Something along the lines of "Sinclair was traded to the New York Rangers in August 1952. In return, the Rangers sent player A, player B and cash to the Red Wings." Please leave me a message at my talk page when these issues have been addressed. Thanks, C679 23:30, 11 December 2013 (UTC)

• Both addressed, thanks! Resolute 01:44, 12 December 2013 (UTC)

• Not yet, you can't just delete the phrase, as you did, because now the sentence is lacking a verb and doesn't make sense. Fix that and we should be all set. Thanks, C679 09:25, 12 December 2013 (UTC)

• Facepalm Well that was dumb. Fixed now. Resolute 17:50, 12 December 2013 (UTC)

• – we're good to go here. C679 23:56, 12 December 2013 (UTC)