Talk:What Took You So Long?/GA1
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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 19:50, 12 December 2020 (UTC)
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Reviewing one of your articles for the second time, since it must feel unfortunate to have a GAN from last month especially with Christmas soon! --K. Peake 19:50, 12 December 2020 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake Hi, and thanks for your time reviewing the article. Right now I am a little busy with work but will resume working on the article in the next couple of days. Thanks again for your review. Frcm1988 (talk) 18:35, 14 December 2020 (UTC)
- Frcm1988 I am perfectly fine with waiting a couple of days and thank you for making me aware; the guideline for keeping GAs on hold is one week anyway, so your statement is not abnormal by any means! --K. Peake 08:27, 15 December 2020 (UTC)
- Frcm1988 Will you be working on it today, as it's been more than a couple of days? --K. Peake 10:00, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
- Frcm1988 I am perfectly fine with waiting a couple of days and thank you for making me aware; the guideline for keeping GAs on hold is one week anyway, so your statement is not abnormal by any means! --K. Peake 08:27, 15 December 2020 (UTC)
Infobox and lead
[edit]- Replace hlist with bullet points in the infobox
- Dublin, Ireland should be in brackets
- "It was written by" → "The song was written by"
- "in Biffco Studios in Dublin, Ireland;" → "at Biffco Studios in Dublin, Ireland." with the target and remove the mixing info since that's not notable for the lead
- Release sentence should be inbetween here and the sound one instead of in the second para
- "The song's sound is influenced" → "A pop rock song, its sound is influenced"
- "that she song is about" → "that the song is about"
- "praising the song's melody" → "praising the melody"
- "Released as the album's lead single on 2 April 2001," → "The song was released as the album's lead single in the UK on 2 April 2001." with the wikilink
- "it topped" → "The song topped" since this will be a new sentence in the different order, with it directly starting the second para
- "and only number-one. This made her" → "and only number one on it, making her."
- Wikilink Spice Girls
- "to top the chart" sentence should end here because the rest is not notable for the lead
- "The song also attracted moderate success in" → ""What Took You So Long?" attracted moderate success across"
- "the top ten in the charts of" → "the top 10 of the charts in" per MOS:NUM
- Remove the promotion bit because "accompanying" makes it clear the music video was for the song
- "music video directed by" → "music video, directed by"
- "in the Mojave Desert" → "at the Mojave Desert"
- "The promotional campaign also included" → "The song's promotional campaign included"
- "it has since then been" → "it has since been"
- "on the setlist in" → "on the setlists for"
Background
[edit]- Retitle to Background and development
- Target single to Single (music)
- "went into a period of hiatus," → "went into a hiatus period,"
- "on their third album" → "on their third studio album"
- Add a note at the end of the sentence stating that the album was ultimately released under the title of Forever and mention the release date
- "outside of the group," → "outside of the Spice Girls,"
- "performed in a UK-only tour," → "performed on their UK-only tour" since there is too many commas otherwise
- "from the third album." → "from Forever." because this will make sense after you have added the note
- "first solo album A Girl Like Me" → "first solo studio album A Girl Like Me"
- "Los Angeles, and New York." → "Los Angeles and New York." as this article is written in British English
- "recording sessions including" → "recording sessions, including"
- "In an web chat on the group's official website, she described the sound of her solo album" → "In a web chat on the group's official website, Bunton described the sound of A Girl Like Me"
- "and that the release date was" → "and the release date was"
Writing and recording
[edit]- "in Richard Stannard's Biffco Studio in Dublin, Ireland." → "at Stannard's Biffco Studio in Dublin, Ireland." with the target
- Target chords to Chord (music)
- "that they worked in" → "that the two of them worked in"
- "on top of it," → "on top of them,"
- "over the chords. He then wrote" → "over the chords, before Stannard wrote"
- "words were done"." → words were done."" since it is a full sentence quoted
- "she commented about" → "and she commented about"
- "pleased with it"." → "pleased with it.""
- "captured on hard disk" → "captured on a hard disk"
- Logic should not be italicised
- "vocal chain, then an" → "vocal chain, then"
- "For the mixing they used" → "For the mixing, Howes used"
- "Stereo equalizer and a" → "Stereo equalizer, and an"
- "For the acoustic feel they" → "To create an acoustic feel, Stannard"
Composition and lyrics
[edit]- Move audio sample to the left and target chorus to Refrain on the text
- "keyboards, and" → "keyboards and"
- ""What Took You So Long?" is a" → "Musically, "What Took You So Long?" is a"
- "written in the" → "It is written in the"
- "common time and moves" → "common time, and moves"
- "It uses the sequence" → "The song uses the sequence"
- Target chorus to Refrain
- "The song starts with an" → "It starts with an"
- "include the use of handclaps" → "includes the use of handclaps" with the target
- [17] should be solely at the end of the sentence
- Target pop to Pop music
- "e-zine" introduction is not needed
- "during the chorus her" → "during the chorus to be her"
- The "strength card" quote is not backed up
- "by other music critics." → "by other writers."
- "She commented" → "She commented,"
- Fullstop should be inside the quote if that is a full sentence; I do not know for sure since the source is one I do not have access to
- The entire quote from the Smash Hits interview is: "I've only had a few boyfriends and I think they were all in my mind when I wrote it, they all take so bloody long!"
- "lover" pointing out the lines" → "lover", pointing out the line"
- Fullstop should not be after the question mark
Release and promotion
[edit]- Remove wikilink on Spice Girls
- "new single, "Holler", and third album, Forever," → "new single "Holler", and Forever,"
- "her upcoming solo album on the group's official website," → "her then-upcoming solo album on the group's website,"
- "on her newly-launched website on 14 February." → "via Bunton's newly-launched website on 14 February 2001."
- "four members individual projects," → "four members' individual projects,"
- "of Bunton's solo album A Girl Like Me and" → "of A Girl Like Me and" since the album has already been introduced
- "of her debut album" → "of her debut studio album"
- "The single's promotional campaign started in March," → "The promotional campaign for "What Took You So Long?" started in March 2001,"
- "of been overlooked by the press, because" → "of being overlooked by the press because"
- "as a band now"." → "as a band now.""
- "to make a telephone interview on 10 March to" → "to set a telephone interview on 10 March 2001 with"
- "leaving the group and" → "leaving the Spice Girls and"
- "This lessen the speculation" → "This lessened the speculation"
- "involment with the group, altought" → "involvement with the group, although"
- "manage Chisholm's and Bunton's solo careers." → "manage the solo careers of Chisholm and Bunton."
- "at the end of March," → "at the end of March 2001,"
- "top twenty of the UK Airplay Chart." → "top 20 of the UK Airplay Chart." per MOS:NUM
- "instore presentations and signings." → "instore presentations alongside signings."
- "on 7 April." → "on 7 April 2001."
- "she began promotional visits" → "Bunton began to make promotional visits"
- "On 24 April she" → "On 24 April 2001, she"
- Cologne should be targeted to from Cologne, Germany
- "France, and Scandinavia." → "France and Scandinavia."
- "did promotion in Singapore in May," → "promoted the song in Singapore during May,"
- "in July." → "during July 2001."
- "included the song, and two" → "included the song and two"
- Target B-sides to A-side and B-side
- "The first one," → "The first B-side,"
- "originally included in" → "originally included on"
- Add release year of the movie in brackets
- "with songwriters and production duo" → "with songwriting and production duo"
- Wikilink music video
Critical reception
[edit]- "from critics were" → "from music critics were" with the target
- Remove target on R&B
- "of the Spice Girls' third album and" → "of Forever and"
- Remove target on Stannard
- "the track. He labelled it" → "the track, labelling it"
- "similar opinion. He praised" → "similar opinion; he praised"
- "considered her image change" → "considered Bunton's image change"
- "same publication, characterized it" → "same publication, characterized the song"
- "he singled it out" → "singling it out"
- "A Girl Like Me highlights calling it" → "A Girl Like Me's highlights while calling the song"
- Remove wikilink on Smash Hits
- "calling it a" → "calling the song a"
- Remove webzine intro
- "named it the best" → "named the song the best"
- "to go pop" and complimented" → "to go pop", and complimented"
- "that to had a number one" → "that to have a number one,"
- "two years prior"," → "two years prior";"
- "Tom Ewing from the e-zine Freaky Trigger was mixed" → "Ewing was mixed"
- Reduce the amount of quoting for this review by paraphrasing parts
- Remove target on AOR
- "thought it was" → "thought it is"
- "Billboard's critic Jon O'Brien, ranked" → "Billboard critic Jon O'Brien ranked" and this sentence should start a new para to separate from the less enthusiastic reviews
- The paragraph focuses on how the production had a mix response, the first one negative, the second mixed, and the last two are more positive. I think dividing the 4 reviews in half will break the flow of this section.
- ""The Spice Girls' 20 Best Solo Singles"," → ""The Spice Girls' 20 Best Solo Singles";"
- Target drive-time radio to Vehicle audio
- "pop tune". She considered that it" → "pop tune", and she considered the song"
Commercial performance
[edit]- Remove the release sentence because that is repeated from earlier and it's irrelevant here
- "It debuted at the" → ""What Took You So Long?" debuted at the"
- "also made a record" → "also set a record"
- "own number-one single in the country." → "own number one single in the UK."
- "It stayed two weeks" → "It spent two weeks"
- "inside the top ten," → "inside the top 10",
- "13 weeks in total," → "and 13 weeks on the chart in total,"
- "on the year-end chart." → "on the year-end chart for 2001."
- "The single was certified" → "The song was certified"
- "the top ten in the singles chart of" → "the top 10 of the charts in"
- Where are the citations for Italy and Sweden?
- "inside the top twenty" → "inside the top 20"
- "peaking inside the top ten" → "peaking inside the top 10"
- "and inside the top twenty in" → "it further reached the top 20 in"
- "Hungary, and Poland." → "Hungary and Poland."
- "The single debuted on" → "The song debuted on"
- "number forty-eight on 22 April 2001 and peaked at number ten" → "number 48 on 22 April 2001 and peaked at number 10"
- "stayed sixteen weeks on" → "lasted for 16 weeks on"
- "for selling 35,000 units" → "for selling 35,000 units in Australia"
- "it debuted on the" → "the song debuted on the"
- "6 May 2001, and eight weeks" → "6 May 2001 and eight weeks"
- "It remained eight weeks in the top ten, 14 weeks" → "The song spent eight weeks in the top 10, 14 weeks"
- "22 weeks in total," → "lasted for 22 weeks in total on the chart,"
- "on the year-end chart." → "on the year-end chart for 2001."
Music video
[edit]- Wikilink music video on the img text
- "with the duo Tin Tin Out," → "with Tin Tin Out,"
- "long kind of thing"." → "long kind of thing.""
- "as the video alternate" → "as the video alternates"
- "that resembles wolves" → "that resemble wolves"
- "Bunton seduces him and gets" → "with Bunton seducing him and getting"
Live performances
[edit]- Img looks good
- "Bunton have performed" → "Bunton has performed"
- "of the setlist in" → "of the setlists for"
- "the single and her debut album" → "the song and A Girl Like Me"
- Stockholm should be targeted to from Stockholm, Sweden
- "at Park Café, in" → "at Park Café in"
- Copenhagen should be targeted to from Copenhagen, Denmark
- "she made an appearance at" → "she delivered a performance of the song at"
- Wikilink Festivalbar
- Padua should be targeted to from Padua, Italy
- "presentations in festivals" → "presentations at festivals"
- "On 9 June she performed the song" → "She performed the song on 9 June"
- "at Radio 1's" → "at BBC Radio 1's"
- "In November she performed" → "In November 2001, she performed it"
- Wikilink Sydney
- "made her first solo show" → "delivered her first solo show"
Formats and track listings
[edit]- Good
Credits and personnel
[edit]- Target Mark "Spike" Stent to Spike Stent
- Target Melanie Chisholm to Melanie C
Charts
[edit]Weekly charts
[edit]- European Hot 100 Singles → Eurochart Hot 100
Year-end charts
[edit]- Good
Certifications and sales
[edit]- Good
References
[edit]- Remove the notes subheading since that is irrelevant here
- Copyvio score looks fine at 30.1%
- Make sure all of these are archived by using the tool
- Shouldn't the last name be followed by first on ref 12's citations for consistency?
- Target EMI UK to EMI on ref 12, and wikilink Virgin Records
- Remove the publisher from ref 13 and target Sheet Music Direct to Hal Leonard LLC
- Remove the publisher from ref 16
- Cite Entertainment.ie as publisher instead for ref 20
- Remove the publisher from ref 23
- Cite Brainpool TV as the sole publisher instead for ref 34
- Remove the publisher from ref 43
- Target MRC Media & Info to MRC (company) on ref 50
- Target Romanian Top 100 to Romanian record charts on ref 57
- Cite The Voice as the sole publisher for ref 71
- Remove the publisher from ref 72
- Cite Inquisitr as publisher instead for ref 79
- Entertainment-focus.com → Entertainment Focus on ref 80
External links
[edit]- Good
Final comments and verdict
[edit]On hold until you fix the issues, great to review one of your articles again though! --K. Peake 17:05, 13 December 2020 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake sorry for taking so long to respond to the review. I believe I did most of the corrections, except for the 2 comments I placed above. Please let me know if there is anything else that needs to be fixed, and thanks again for your time. Frcm1988 (talk) 10:06, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
- Frcm1988 The 2 places where you commented against implementing my changes had fully understandable reasons and you do not need to comply for those ones; I do have two issues now though, the first of which is that you have not added a reference to the note for verifying the release date of Forever. As for my second issue, the target to Dublin should on the Dublin, Ireland text in the lead like in the body, rather than wikilinking the city name. --K. Peake 10:39, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake I made the changes. I couldn't find a source for the first release of Forever on 1 November in Japan, so I added the UK release instead. Frcm1988 (talk) 12:16, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
- Frcm1988 It is a pass but I will update the WPS and good articles page when I get home, as I'm on a bus right now. --K. Peake 15:39, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake I made the changes. I couldn't find a source for the first release of Forever on 1 November in Japan, so I added the UK release instead. Frcm1988 (talk) 12:16, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
- Frcm1988 The 2 places where you commented against implementing my changes had fully understandable reasons and you do not need to comply for those ones; I do have two issues now though, the first of which is that you have not added a reference to the note for verifying the release date of Forever. As for my second issue, the target to Dublin should on the Dublin, Ireland text in the lead like in the body, rather than wikilinking the city name. --K. Peake 10:39, 18 December 2020 (UTC)