Talk:Vennture Brew Company/GA1
GA Review
[edit]The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewer: LunaEatsTuna (talk · contribs) 18:23, 17 January 2023 (UTC)
- Cheers for another great article! I have left some comments below. Like last time, please ping me once you have addressed these concerns so that I may know when to reevaluate. Thanks! 𓃦LunaEatsTuna (💬) 18:29, 17 January 2023 (UTC)
- Nice work on the changes! I am now happy to pass this article for GA status. Congrats on another fantastic GA! Hopefully you can get that image soon :) 𓃦LunaEatsTuna (💬) 02:08, 18 January 2023 (UTC)
Copyvio check
[edit]Earwig says good to go. But:
- "involved the creation of a 60-page business plan" is a bit word for word – recommend something like "involved the creation of a business plan 60 pages long" instead.
Prose
[edit]- The lead could probably be expanded by a few sentence.
- "coffee shop and brewery was kindled" – wikilink brewery.
- "at the intersection of coffee, beer, and community." – "coffee, beer, and community" should have quotation marks.
- "dove into the intricacies" – sounds slightly on the informal side. Is a better word choice available? Otherwise, apologies if this is standard in American English though, which I do not speak.
- "been brewing beer at home for years" – recommend "been homebrewing for years prior" and wikilink homebrewing.
- "took a job at a nearby taproom." – wikilink taproom.
- "They were also boosted" – informal, rephrase. Also;
- Could the Kickstarter campaign be expanded upon? It sounds quite noteworthy. Do the sources say when/who started the campaign, how many backers it had, their goal, etc?
- I think "1%" should be changed to "one percent" for formality.
- Unabbreviate both mentions of North Ave.
- "espresso-based drinks plus tea sourced" – change to "espresso-based drinks as well as tea sourced"
Refs
[edit]All sources are RS or used appropriately. Passes spotcheck—no concerns with refs 1, 4, 6, 7 or 10.
Other
[edit]Short description, See also, coords, navs and cats good.
- Do we have any free images of the brewery available? Also, what about the logo?
- Recommend adding template:Use X English.
- Recommend adding template:Use mdy dates.
- Hello again LunaEatsTuna! As before, I've implemented all the requested changes with specific exceptions/comments below.
- Unfortunately, none of the sources that I've seen or remember seeing go into detail about the Kickstarter. I would instead link to it directly as a primary source... but kickstarter.com is on either our blacklist or the Wikimedia global one.
- Oh well, not a problem.
- I've been meaning to walk down and get a free photo of the brewery, which is located near my residence, but haven't had the chance to yet. An attempt to get a high-quality photo directly from them was successful up until the point I had to explain the intricacies of free licensing and why I needed specially emailed permissions. They stopped replying after that. Ed [talk] [majestic titan] 01:44, 18 January 2023 (UTC)
- Oof, strange how some folks get really confused about this sorta stuff!
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.