Talk:USS Thetis Bay/GA1
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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 12:55, 4 September 2021 (UTC)
Comments
- "painted in Measure 33, Design 10A camouflage" isn't mentioned in the article or referenced here.
- Changes in camouflage aren't usually recorded, and I think that it provides some useful context when viewing the image.
- I just wanted to see it referenced. The Rambling Man (Keep wearing the mask...) 07:01, 6 September 2021 (UTC)
- "mythology.[3] The" always seems odd to cite just one fact in a lead. This should be mentioned in the main body so just reference it there.
- "the Nereid Thetis" mildly troubling sea of blue issue here, especially if you don't (and many won't) know what Nereid means.
- "The bay is .." we've somewhat lost this in the previous lengthy sentence.
- "The ship was launched in March..." similar, perhaps we can say "Thetis Bay was launched..."
- Both addressed by moving the naming part down.
- "in Operation Magic Carpet" no need for a pipelink.
- "early war losses" would that be "early-war losses"?
- "1 Battle star" -> "1 battle star".
- "Washington under" comma after Washington.
- Yeah, the naming details belong here, not in the lead. Or at least in both place, not exclusively the lead.
- Year ranges in service record in infobox should use en-dash not hyphen to separate.
- Some text sandwiching going on where you have images both left and right of text.
- "Luzon, the Philippines throughout" comma after Philippines.
- " a Landing Platform Helicopter" why is that capitalised?
- "In August 1959, Thetis Bay" too many run-ons and I'm not sure the grammar works at the end...
- "anchored off of" no need for of.
- "from the Navy list on" any reason we can't give it the full official name?
- Ref 10, I have to subscribe to see this.
- Fix text size of External links et seq.
That's all I have for now. The Rambling Man (Keep wearing the mask...) 19:41, 5 September 2021 (UTC)
- @The Rambling Man: I've addressed your points. Stikkyy t/c 20:55, 5 September 2021 (UTC)