Talk:Trans-Europe Express (album)/GA1

GA Review

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GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria

1. Is it reasonably well written?

   A. Prose quality:

   A few issues I'm afraid.

In the lead:

• "Hütter and Schneider met with musicians David Bowie and Iggy Pop prior to recording which influenced song lyrics, and Maxime Schmitt encouraged the group to record a French-language version of the song "Showroom Dummies". This would lead the group to later record several songs in French." Suggest splitting first sentence after "lyrics" and merging the bit about Maxime Schmitt with the second sentence.
• "...Trans-Europe Express was the highest charting album yet peaking at 119 on the American charts." The highest charting Kraftwerk album?
• "Both the album and single "Showroom Dummies" did not chart in the United Kingdom until the 1980s. The album has been re-released by the group in several formats and continued to receive praise from modern critics who generally praise the album as one of the greatest and most influential records of the decade." Use of the word "praise" twice in the same sentence. The mention of the 1980s in the previous sentence makes it unclear which decade the last sentence refers to.

In 'Production':

• "began to work on the album which currently had the title "Europe Endless"" Think it would be better to say something along the lines of "the album which was then called Europe Endless" (also Europe Endless should be italicised)
• "Kraftwerk went to train bridges to listen to the sounds the train would actually produce. The group found the sound the train made was not dancable and changed it slightly." This sentence feels stubby and out of place. Why are the band recording train noises? The lead mentions that the album was influenced by the Trans-Europe Express but this isn't referenced in this section.
• "Further mixing of the album was done when Hütter and Schneider visited Los Angeles to mix some of the music at the Record Plant Studio. Elements of the mixing sessions that were done in Los Angeles were dropped from the album, including the use of more upfront vocals in order to do more mixing in Düsseldorf and Hamburg later." Further to what? There's no mention of original mixing sessions. The last sentence is very clunky, do you mean that the mixes weren't used and that the band decided to remix the album in Düsseldorf and Hamburg? Consider linking first instance of "mixing" to Audio mixing (recorded music)
• "J. Stara's image of the group was taken in Paris" What is J. Stara's image? The previous sentence states that the Seymour photo was used for the cover but the Stara image isn't given any context.

In 'Music':

• "Allmusic referred to Trans-Europe Express as a concept album with two different themes. The first being the disparities between reality and image with the songs "Hall of Mirrors" and "Showroom Dummies" and the others about the glorification of Europe." In my opinion the section would be better off starting with the Flür quote although you should set it in context a bit more and discuss it in relation to this album specifically. "with the songs "Hall of Mirrors" and "Showroom Dummies"" could be worded better, perhaps ",represented by the songs "Hall of Mirrors" and "Showroom Dummies","
• "Kraftwerk found their reception in England or America was putting the group in the field of Nazi Germany. The group desired to make a new symbol for the European community by using the symbol of the Trans Europ Express." This needs to be worded better, suggest something like "Kraftwerk believed critics in the United Kingdom and United States associated them with Nazi Germany, with tracks such as "Autobahn" inextricably linked with the Nazis who built the high-speed roads in the 1930s and 1940s. At the same time the band were keen to move away from their German heritage towards a new sense of European identity and felt that the Trans Europ Express could be used to symbolize this." (sourced from the Quietus article)
• "The musical style of Trans Europe Express was described by Huey" Who is Huey?
• "Hütter stated that the reason why the music on the album is minimalist by stating that "If we can convey an idea with one or two notes, it is better than to play a hundred or so notes". Needs rewording to something like "Hütter has commentated on the minimalist nature of the album, stating that "If we..."
• ""Show Room Dummies" was described by Allmusic as "bouncily melodic in a way that most of Trans-Europe Express isn't" and that the lyrics were "slightly paranoid"." Consider changing to "with lyrics which are "slightly paranoid".
• "Allmusic describes the songs musical elements such as the haunting theme and "and the deadpan chanting of the title phrase, are slowly layered over that rhythmic base in much the same way that the earlier "Autobahn" was constructed". The song's lyrics reference traveling Station to Station to meeting with Iggy Pop and David Bowie." These sentences need rewording. What does "traveling Station to Station to meeting with Iggy Pop and David Bowie" mean?

'Release':

• "used on the single for "Showroom Dummies"" consider "used on the single sleeve for "Showroom Dummies"
• "while the songs from the album were played for them" Played for who? Presumably critics who were invited on the train ride?
• "Kraftwerk's previous album Radio-Activity by charting higher on the Billboard Top LPs & Tapes chart, peaking at number 117" A higher chart position does not necessarily mean the album sold more than its predecessor. If it sold more and charted higher you should say "and charted higher" rather than "by charting higher"
• "with Metal on Metal only being the initial two minutes of the music and the remainder retitled "Abzug" (English: "Departure")" Needs clarifying, I'm not sure what you mean here

'Critical reception':

• "Contemporary reviews for the Trans-Europe Express were positive." In this context I would expect that you mean contemporary with the albums release but you then go on to quote modern reviewers

1. B. MoS compliance:

   Just a few points:

• Instruments should be wikilinked in 'Personnel' section where possible as should the recording studios.
• Consider adding singles to the Infobox (see In Utero)

1. Is it factually accurate and verifiable?

   A. References to sources:

   Very well researched article.

   B. Citation of reliable sources where necessary:

   Great stuff, all sources check out.

   C. No original research:

   Again, no original research present.

2. Is it broad in its coverage?

   A. Major aspects:

   If the album is a concept album I'd like to know more about Hütter and Schneider's thoughts.

   B. Focused:

   Again, very good

3. Is it neutral?

   Fair representation without bias:

   Appears to be neutral.

4. Is it stable?

   No edit wars, etc:

   Stable

5. Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?

   Album covers are all tagged and seem fine as they are discussed in the body of the text.

6. Overall:

   Pass or Fail:

   Overall a great article but I'm putting on hold until me concerns are addressed. Cavie78 (talk) 12:49, 15 December 2009 (UTC)

Reviewer: Cavie78 (talk) 12:49, 15 December 2009 (UTC)