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Reviewer: Guerillero (talk · contribs) 23:38, 30 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]


I first heard "It's Dangerous Business Walking Out Your Front Door" on the first You Can't Handle The Tooth! sampler. Needless to say, I am excited to dig into this article. --Guerillero Parlez Moi 23:38, 30 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Background
  • The whole first paragraph reads weird. Most sentences feel like a word is missing
  • Why did a core member dip from Warped Tour?
Wasn't able to find a source for this. MusicforthePeople (talk) 10:04, 31 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]
  • Underoath played shows with This Runs Through; both bands lived in the same city. What city? The semicolon doesn't work here
  • Chamberlain ... Chamberlain ... Chamberlain... feels choppy
  • Can you tell me who underoath is?
Recording
  • Underoath in January 2004, and a month later, they recorded
  • Wisner ... Wisner ... Wisner ... Wisner in a row feels choppy
    • Wisner's neighbor repeatedly banged on Wisner's door is probably the worst offender
Composition and lyrics
  • described as metalcore, but according to Alex Henderson of AllMusic, the album
  • You described the Henderson quote and then just gave it
  • You have several paragraphs that do not make sense to me because they go in several different directions
I separated them into overview and tracks if that makes it clearer. MusicforthePeople (talk) 10:04, 31 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]
  • The Aaron Gillespie article discusses how the lyrics were drawn from a breakup. Is there anything to this?
I googled the quote and the hits seemed to be Gillespie's article, where its unsourced, and copies/farms of it. I would have to track down back issues of Alternative Press, but as there isn't an issue/date, I'd be searching blindly. MusicforthePeople (talk) 10:04, 31 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]
Release and promotion
  • In March and April 2004, Underoath toured the US as part of the Solid State Tour give some context
  • I don't understand what you are trying to say here On April 21, 2004, the release of They're Only Chasing Safety was announced for two months hence and "Reinventing Your Exit" was posted on the band's Purevolume profile.
  • does Julie have a last name?
  • You swing from tour to packaging as a new paragraph but then go back to touring without a paragraph break. Is this chronological?
Chronologically. MusicforthePeople (talk) 10:04, 31 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]
  • In June 2004, the band embarked on a US tour with Eighteen Visions, and appeared at that year's Hellfest and on a small stage at the Warped Tour the two ands is weird
  • They appeared at the South by Southwest music conference, and headlined the Total Badical Tour, which ran into May 2005 and were supported by Fear Before the March of Flames, the Chariot, Hopesfall and These Arms Are Snakes. Can you rework?
Reception
  • Don't assume I will remember who a reviewer is from the lyrics section in the reception section
Overall
  • Take a close read for flow.
  • Sentences often feel staccato. Switch them up with more dependent clauses and such
  • The name repeating is a problem

To be continued --Guerillero Parlez Moi 00:15, 31 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]

I've made the changes. MusicforthePeople (talk) 10:04, 31 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]
@Guerillero: Forgot to ping. MusicforthePeople (talk) 19:37, 31 October 2022 (UTC)[reply]
@Guerillero: Hi, any update to this? MusicforthePeople (talk) 15:18, 1 December 2022 (UTC)[reply]
I will take a look today -- Guerillero Parlez Moi 17:18, 7 December 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Status query

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Guerillero, MusicforthePeople, where does this review stand? It's approaching two months, and as far as I can tell, "to be continued" hasn't been followed up on. Should a new reviewer be found to finish up? Thanks. BlueMoonset (talk) 20:35, 27 December 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@BlueMoonset: Is it fine if we give Guerillero until the end of the year, before asking for another reviewer? There's only a few days left, so I'd want to give him a chance to finish this up. MusicforthePeople (talk) 14:32, 28 December 2022 (UTC)[reply]
MusicforthePeople, that's absolutely fine. BlueMoonset (talk) 16:46, 28 December 2022 (UTC)[reply]
@BlueMoonset/MusicforthePeople: I apologize for my disappearance. Let me finish this. I just need to post some sourcing comments -- Guerillero Parlez Moi 15:37, 30 December 2022 (UTC)[reply]

I only have one piece of feedback on the sourcing

  • Why are the press releases from Mitch Schnedier Organization RSes?

Besides that, everything else checks out. Very sorry for dropping the ball here --Guerillero Parlez Moi 22:30, 30 December 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@Guerillero: I think they're the press relations company for the band during this time, so I viewed them in the vein of WP:ABOUTSELF since these would have been done in collaboration with the band members and/or label. MusicforthePeople (talk) 23:03, 30 December 2022 (UTC)[reply]
@Guerillero: Just a reminder. MusicforthePeople (talk) 22:02, 9 January 2023 (UTC)[reply]
@MusicforthePeople: That works for me. Pass. I apologize for dropping the ball and being a shit reviewer. -- Guerillero Parlez Moi 13:25, 16 January 2023 (UTC)[reply]