Talk:The Art of Losing (American Hi-Fi album)/GA1
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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 12:52, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
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I will review this later on for the GAN backlog drive! --K. Peake 12:52, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
Infobox and lead
[edit]- Are you sure there isn't inappropriate spacing before the parameters per Template:Infobox album?
- This was done by a WP:GOCE user in this edit. I didn't change it back since it didn't break the infobox. Yeepsi (talk) 18:09, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
- The recording date is not sourced; it is only stated in the body they started in March and aimed for completion in April
- Changed to 2002 as I couldn't find an end/final recording month. Yeepsi (talk) 18:09, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
- Yeepsi Just remove the recording date then, as it is not sourced that recording finished that year (remember, the album came out in 2003). --K. Peake 18:53, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
- Removed. Yeepsi (talk) 18:58, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
- Yeepsi Just remove the recording date then, as it is not sourced that recording finished that year (remember, the album came out in 2003). --K. Peake 18:53, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
- Changed to 2002 as I couldn't find an end/final recording month. Yeepsi (talk) 18:09, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
- Target Pop punk to Pop-punk
- "their eponymous debut album (2001)," → "their eponymous debut studio album (2001),"
- "also in Hollywood." → "in Hollywood of the state." because Burbank is not in the same location as Hollywood
- "The album has been described" → "It has been described"
- Target pop punk to Pop-punk
- "power pop and" → "power pop, and"
- "and drew comparisons" → "while received comparisons"
- Critical should be mentioned before commercial reception; change to saying "while reaching number 80..." at the end of the sentence
- "The album's title track was released to radio" → "Its title track was released to radio as the lead single" with the wikilink
- Mention that it was the US Alternative Airplay chart
- Wikilink music videos
Background and production
[edit]- "in February 2001[1] and promoted it" → "in February 2001, and promoted the album" plus [1] should be at the end of the sentence instead before [3] since it backs up the release date and the song being the lead single
- Regarding the recording of the album, the source itself mentions them aiming to complete by April like you have wrote here; however, can you find anywhere the date recording was actually finished so dates can be added?
- I couldn't find an end/final recording month in any of the sources. Yeepsi (talk) 18:09, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
- "and from Errin Familia at" → "and it was also provided by Errin Familia at" to avoid confusion
- Wikilink Portland, Maine
- "The album cost around $200,000 to make; when the band's label" → "It cost around $200,000 to make; when American Hi-Fi's record label" with the wikilink
Composition
[edit]- Retitle to Music and lyrics
- "to its final title." → "to the final title." but are you sure this doesn't belong in background or release?
- Target pop punk to Pop-punk
- "power pop and rock, and has been compared" → "power pop, and rock, while it was compared"
- "The opening title-track evokes" → "The opening title track evokes" with the target
- "being told what to do." → "being told what to do by others." to be specific
- "of the band's song" → "of American Hi-Fi's song"
- "trying to retrieve his" → "placing more focus on retrieving his"
- "recall the works of" → "recalls the works of"
- "and cribs the work of" → "as well as cribbing the work of"
- [15][13] should be put in numerical order
- "recall the music of" → "recalls the music of"
- Are you sure "channels" is the correct term for this section or should you paraphrase, as I'm not too sure if it's encyclopedic?
- Target sampled to Sampling (music)
Release
[edit]- Retitle to Release and promotion
- Wikilink music video
- "over three days and" → "over a period of three days and"
- "The video shows the band" → "It shows American Hi-Fi"
- "some fans approaching" → "some fans previously approaching"
- Mention that it was released to US radio stations
- "as the album's lead single" → "as the lead single from The Art of Losing" with the wikilink
- Target digital downloads to Music download
- Target CD to Compact disc
- "and addition to" → "in addition to"
- "titled "Self Control" that" → "entitled "Self Control" that"
- "both from the group's debut album" → "both from American Hi-Fi"
- "bonus tracks while" → "bonus tracks, while" with the wikilink per MOS:LINK2SECT
- "It was promoted with" → "The former was promoted with"
- "club tour throughout February," → "club tour throughout February 2009,"
- Mention that the performance was the following month
- "In April and May that year, the group" → "In April and May of that year, American Hi-Fi"
- "east coast tour[24] but the tour" → "east coast tour,[24] but the tour"
- "due to family issues." → "due to the lead act's family issues."
- Mention that the music videos were released in October 2009
Reception
[edit]- IGN should not be italicised
- Ah, I was thrown off by the IGN article having its title in italics. Yeepsi (talk) 18:09, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
- Italicise Melodic, Rock Hard, Rolling Stone, and Spin
- "E! Online opened" → "The staff of E! Online opened"
- "the listener was in" → "the listener enters"
- "metal-friendly ... that" → "metal-friendly [...] that"
- Wikilink Bay City Rollers
- IGN should not be italicised
- "said lyricism was "not [the band's]" → "said lyricism is "not [American Hi-Fi's]"
- "Rock Hard said" → "The staff of Rock Hard said"
- ""evoke[d] little emotions in me. They" → ""evoke[s] little emotions", writing: "They"
- "be annoying ..." → "be annoying [...]"
- "wrote the band" → "wrote American Hi-Fi"
- "though with Jones" → "though the inclusion of Jones"
- Wikilink alternative rock
- "and that the group had lost" → "and noted American Hi-Fi as having lost"
- "personal style," sounding" → "personal style", sounding"
- "the US Billboard 200.[32] The title track reached number 33 on the" → "the US Billboard 200,[32] while the title track reached number 33 on the US"
- Invoke the Billboard 200 from the chart table by using a refname in place of [32]
- ""best-of pop punk album" list." → ""best-of pop punk albums" lists."
Track listing
[edit]- See MOS:TABLECAPTION
Personnel
[edit]- Target Lars Fox to Grotus
Charts
[edit]- Good
References
[edit]- Copyvio score looks pretty good at 24.8%!
- Top job with the archiving of all these where possible!
- Wikilink Island Records on ref 5
- Cite IGN as publisher instead for ref 8
- Remove or replace ref 10 per WP:RSSM
- Fix MOS:QWQ issues with ref 14
- Cite FMQB as work/website instead for ref 17
- Wikilink The Island Def Jam Music Group on ref 19
- Ref 32 is a duplicate of ref 35; see my earlier comment for instructions on how to fix this
- Target Schirmer Trade Books to Wise Music Group on that source
Final comments and verdict
[edit]On hold until all of the issues are fixed, but do not feel afraid to reach out if you have any queries! --K. Peake 17:30, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
- Whoops, sorry, I've done all the changes. Yeepsi (talk) 21:51, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
- Yeepsi ✓ Pass now, there were a few further issues that had arisen after my comments being made but I copyedited the fixes in! --K. Peake 06:38, 8 March 2021 (UTC)
- Whoops, sorry, I've done all the changes. Yeepsi (talk) 21:51, 7 March 2021 (UTC)