Talk:Tempt, Tease and Touch/GA1
Appearance
GA Review
[edit]GA toolbox |
---|
Reviewing |
Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch
Reviewer: Carbrera (talk · contribs) 06:35, 12 August 2016 (UTC)
Thank you! Aoba47 (talk) 06:42, 12 August 2016 (UTC)
Comments
[edit]Since I no longer am participating in the GA Cup, and likely never will again, I will be addressing in concerns as a bulleted list instead of my previous section-by-section delivery.
- You can add any previously sourced notes in the infobox
Not done. I am not sure if this is necessary. I am using Purr by Katy Perry as a template by the way. All the information should be already sourced in the body of the article. If you think something specific should be cited, please let me know.
- For sake of continuity, any mention of the three fragrances should either include the Oxford comma, as "Tempt, Tease, and Touch", or without the comma, as "Tempt, Tease and Touch". It's purely stylistic, but it should remain constant throughout the entire article
Done. Sorry for the mistake
- "The perfumes received primarily negative feedback. It has been featured on a list of best celebrity-endorsed perfumes, but was also criticized as a failed attempt to revive the group's career." --> "The perfumes received primarily negative feedback and received criticism as a failed attempt to revive the group's career. It has been featured on a list of best celebrity-endorsed perfumes conducted by Glamour."; If this is true, I'd add it
Done Thank you for the suggestion.
- The first two sentences in "Conception" use "launch" and "launching" almost back-to-back
Done.
- Please link "The Perfume Shop" under the section "Release and reception"
Done.
- Any examples you could provide to prove "selected retailers"?
Not done. Unfortunately, there is not that much information regarding the release and I could not find any information outside of the "selected retailers" phrase, but I will keep my eye out for more information in the future.
- "That Grape Juice" is not a reliable source and should be removed
Done.
- Great work! Ping me when you are done. Carbrera (talk) 18:48, 12 August 2016 (UTC)
- @Carbrera: I have addressed all of your comments above. Thank you for your review, and let me know if there is anything else I need to do. I am sorry to hear about the negative experience you had with the GA cup. I thought you did a wonderful job with it. Aoba47 (talk) 20:54, 12 August 2016 (UTC)
- @Aoba47: I appreciated your kind words. I don't know if I had a negative experience with the GA Cup, but I found out that several users seemed unimpressed with my work and dedication towards the competition. I don't think I have enough in me to do that all over again next year; I'd much rather create and expand articles as I have much more pleasure and self-control when doing that. Nothing here catches my eye on why this shouldn't pass, so I will be passing it now. Thanks for addressing everything so quickly. Carbrera (talk) 22:41, 12 August 2016 (UTC)
- @Carbrera: Of course! I have definitely encountered similar problems in the past, and it is a good idea to stick with what you enjoy writing on and editing. Aoba47 (talk) 23:06, 12 August 2016 (UTC)
- Great work! Ping me when you are done. Carbrera (talk) 18:48, 12 August 2016 (UTC)