Talk:Still Jennifer Lopez

Still Jennifer Lopez has been listed as one of the Social sciences and society good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it.
Review: August 22, 2013. (Reviewed version).

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A fact from Still Jennifer Lopez appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the Did you know column on 16 November 2012 (check views). The text of the entry was as follows:

Did you know... that the release of Still Jennifer Lopez, the second fragrance to be endorsed by Jennifer Lopez, was not anticipated due to the negative publicity generated from her film Gigli?

A record of the entry may be seen at Wikipedia:Recent additions/2012/November. The nomination discussion and review may be seen at Template:Did you know nominations/Still Jennifer Lopez.

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GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Still Jennifer Lopez/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Tomica (talk · contribs) 13:49, 21 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

There are no dead links or disambiguation wiki links. Good!

Infobox

Looks good. — Tomíca^(T2ME) 22:22, 21 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

Why is mandarin in capital letter? — Tomíca^(T2ME) 22:22, 21 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
The fragrance captivates the mature, elegant side of Lopez and was aimed at a female demographic ---> This doesn't read neutral, it's more like a review. Please copy-edited it a bit. — Tomíca^(T2ME) 22:22, 21 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Why are there references in the lead? Isn't the information already in the body of the article? — Tomíca^(T2ME) 22:22, 21 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Fixed everything. However I was told that Mandarin should be capatilized beccause of being named after Mandarin China (or something, not sure). Fixed it anyway, it did look odd. — Ar re 04:57, 22 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Background and development

in America ---> in the United States. — Tomíca^(T2ME) 22:22, 21 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
was then released ---> remove then. — Tomíca^(T2ME) 22:22, 21 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
While Glow by JLo was aimed at the female market at girls between the age of 15 and 25, Still Jennifer Lopez was aimed to appeal to an older demographic of females 25 and above ---> According to who? Press release, a reviewer, JLO herself? — Tomíca^(T2ME) 22:22, 21 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
The rest is fine. — Tomíca^(T2ME) 22:22, 21 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Done — Ar re 04:57, 22 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Packaging and scent

Everything is good, except the issue with the Mandarin, already mentioned in the lead. — Tomíca^(T2ME) 22:28, 21 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Done — Ar re 04:57, 22 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

A suggestion!

Since promotion and response are small paragraphs, why don't you merge them under 'Release' and make them separate, however, under that section. — Tomíca^(T2ME) 22:28, 21 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Done — Ar re 04:57, 22 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

I read the rest of the article. Everything is good... passing the article. — Tomíca^(T2ME) 17:13, 22 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Thankyou so much Tomica, for the review. :) — Ar re 03:47, 23 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]