Talk:Staurakios (eunuch)/GA1
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Reviewer: Xtzou (Talk) 18:13, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
Hi, this is a very nice little article and I enjoyed it very much, although I know nothing of the history. I did some minor copy editing which you are free to revert any errors. I have just a few comments:
- According to the MoS, captions should end in a period since neither of them are complete sentences.
- I believe you meant to say they should not end in a period? If so, then Done.
- Maybe you could say in the lead where all this primarily takes place. Is it Constantinople?
- Mostly, yes. But since Staurakios took part in a couple of expeditions, I think it would be wrong to put such an explicit and restrictive statement in the lede. What exactly did you have in mind for this though?
- First minister under Irenis regency
- "appointed him to the post of logothetes tou dromou, i.e the Empire's foreign minister." - suggest removing the i.e. The comma is sufficient.
- Done
- "This reliance on eunuchs caused some hostility by the military" - hostitily of the military? or caused the military to become hostile? or caused some hostility in the military?
- Done
- "defection of the prominent Armenian strategos of the Bucellarian Theme Tatzates to the Arabs in 782." - who were the "Arabs"? Could you wikilink to something?
- Done
- "of 70,000 or 90,000 gold dinars" - could you waffle and say 70,000 to 90,000? That would convey uncertainty, if there is uncertainty.
- The primary sources are ambiguous. It is not a range, but two different sums proposed by different sources.
- "In the next year however, Staurakios led an imperial expedition against the Slavic communities (Sclaviniae) of Greece" - don't think the "however" is needed
- Quite correct. Done
- "Staurakios was allowed" by Irene?
- Clarified, and reworded a little. Done
- "Irene moved towards the restoration of the veneration of icons." - was it explained that veneration of icons was lost?
- Added date and link to relevant article. Done
- Clash with Constantine VI
- "along with Irene and Constantine himself" - can it say, Staurakios was recorded as attending as a judge in the show for the 17-year-old Constantine Vi, along with Irene? Or rewrite it somehow to get rid, if possible, "himself".
- I've changed it a bit, but the "himself" referred to Constantine VI, not Staurakios. Done
- "Constantine and his friends were preempted by Staurakios, however, who had Irene arrest, torture, exile or imprison Constantine's associates, while the young emperor himself was placed under house arrest." - he had himself put under house arrest?
- Reworded. Done
Everything else looks very good. Xtzou (Talk) 18:13, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks for taking the time :). Any other suggestions would be welcome, esp. if it serves to make the article more comprehensible to people who "don't know the history". Best regards, Constantine ✍ 08:55, 10 May 2010 (UTC)
- Further suggestions
- Maybe a map would help to show what geographic areas the article is discussing. Were they in Constantinople, or where?
- I am afraid that few good maps of the Byz. Empire exist, and none for this particular period (turn of the 8th century). Until I find the time to make one, readers will have to follow the links, I guess.
- "He acted as effective first minister during her regency" - sounds odd. He was effectively the first minister? He was in effect the first minister during her regency? What was "first minister"?
- Done
- First minister under Irene's regency
- Would it be correct to say: "Staurakios was a patrician who emerged into prominece in 781? (I realized there is nothing about his background, prior to rising.)
- Hmmm, there is nothing known about him prior to 781. He was a patrikios, hence obviously already a high court official (amended the text to clarify that), but that is it.
- "prohibited since 730 (see Byzantine Iconoclasm). - could it say prohibited since 730 by Byzantine Iconoclasm?
- Changed the wording there, since Constantine V actually established it as imperial policy. The link along with the regnal dates for Constantine V given above should suffice.
- "defection of the prominent Armenian strategos of the Bucellarian Theme Tatzates to the Abbasids in 782." - some commas could help clarify the "sea of blue": "defection of the prominent Armenian strategos of the Bucellarian Theme, Tatzates, to the Abbasids in 782.
- Done
- Clash with Constantine VI
- "along with Irene and the young emperor himself. Maria of Amnia was chosen, although Constantine himself was unhappy" - repetition of "himself"
- Done
- "he had Irene arrest, torture, exile or imprison" - he convinced Irene to arrest, torture etc.? Was Irene in his complete control?
- Done
- "This turn of events drove the Armeniacs once again to mutiny, but their commander, Alexios Mosele, was in Constantinople" - what is the significance of his being in Constantinople? Where was everyone else? (I am not clear about locations in this article.)
- The Armeniacs were in northeastern Anatolia, and Mosele, as their commander, should have been there, not in the capital. As I said above on your map question, you'll have to follow the links for the locations.
- "Despite guarantees of safety, he was imprisoned and later blinded" - should clarify the "he" to Constantine VI.
- Done
- "agents foiled an expedition headed by Constantine against the Arabs" - who were the Arabs?
- I have wikilinked "Arabs" to the Abbasid Caliphate, so this is meant throughout.
Xtzou (Talk) 13:45, 10 May 2010 (UTC)
GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria
- Is it reasonably well written?
- A. Prose quality: Well written
- B. MoS compliance: Complies with basic MoS
- A. Prose quality: Well written
- Is it factually accurate and verifiable?
- A. References to sources: Reliable sources
- B. Citation of reliable sources where necessary: Well referenced
- C. No original research:
- A. References to sources: Reliable sources
- Is it broad in its coverage?
- A. Major aspects: Sets the context
- B. Focused: Remains focused on the subject
- A. Major aspects: Sets the context
- Is it neutral?
- Fair representation without bias:
- Fair representation without bias:
- Is it stable?
- No edit wars, etc:
- No edit wars, etc:
- Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?
- A. Images are copyright tagged, and non-free images have fair use rationales:
- B. Images are provided where possible and appropriate, with suitable captions:
- A. Images are copyright tagged, and non-free images have fair use rationales:
- Overall:
- Pass or Fail: Pass!
- Pass or Fail: Pass!
Congratulations! Xtzou (Talk) 13:30, 11 May 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks, and thanks also for a thorough review! Best regards, Constantine ✍ 13:52, 11 May 2010 (UTC)