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Talk:Statue of George H. Perkins/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: Zawed (talk · contribs) 10:31, 9 June 2021 (UTC)[reply]

I will review, comments to follow over next few days. Zawed (talk) 10:31, 9 June 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Comments as follows:

Infobox

  • The dimensions given here are for the statue but the materials are also for the structure. Not sure if the template will allow it but perhaps add the dimensions for the structure as well.
    • Edited the materials in the infobox to specify whether it applies to the statue or surrounding structure.

Lead

  • It seems that the statue is the basis of a public memorial but this isn't really reflected in the first sentence. How about: "The statue of George H. Perkins is a public memorial that stands on the grounds of the New Hampshire State House in Concord, New Hampshire, United States."
    • Done.

Background and creation

  • Suggest breaking the paragraph at the sentence following mention of Perkin's death.
    • Done.
  • on behalf of the state, a statue of her father. suggest "a statue of her father as the basis for a public memorial." If going with this, you will need to move the link on memorial to the proposed mention. This change reinforces the point being made in my comment above for the lead.
    • Done.

Dedication

  • The mention of "commander" should be capitalised as it is a rank being used as part of a title. It would be lower case if not being used as a title, i.e. Captain Jones, Jones was a captain.
    • Done.
  • As above for rear admiral
    • Done.

Replica

  • a replica of this statue suggest "a replica of Perkin's statue"
    • Done.

Design

  • link keystone, bas-relief, Doric? All unusual terms
    • Done.
  • On either side of the niche structure are a depictions of an eagle
    • Done.
  • The final paragraph of this section deals with its location. The reference to the "Capitol" is confusing as earlier it is stated the status is in the grounds of the New Hampshire State House. Some context is needed.
    • Done, changed Capitol to State House.
  • It is mentioned that the wall of the building was extended to obscure the plaque. I struggled to understand this until I looked at the picture, and then it was clear. This makes me think that perhaps the caption of the image could mention this as well. I suggest moving the image down a little so it is closer to mention of the Capitol building.
    • Moved image down and changed caption to mention the enlargement and how the rear of the memorial is obscured.

See also

  • The 1902 in art link probably isn't useful to the average reader, too broad a topic.
    • Removed 1902 in art from see also section.

Bibiliography

  • For Alden and Holzer, I don't it necessary to mention the "via Google Books" since the URL takes the reader there anyway. Similarly, the official proceedings and the internet archive.
    • Removed via sections from references.

Other stuff

  • One dupe link: bronze
    • Fixed.
  • Image tag for the building image check out OK. The one for the statue may need a PD-art-type tag for the statue, the existing one I think only covers the photograph.

That's it for me. Will check back in a few days. Zawed (talk) 10:57, 10 June 2021 (UTC)[reply]

JJonahJackalope, just a ping as I'm not sure if you have seen this. Cheers, Zawed (talk) 10:33, 14 June 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Zawed, thanks for starting this review, I think I've addressed all the points you made and if there are any other comments or concerns you have, please feel free to reach out. -JJonahJackalope (talk) 13:45, 16 June 2021 (UTC)[reply]
JJonahJackalope, just checking you have seen my comment above RE the infobox? Zawed (talk) 03:13, 27 June 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Zawed, sorry about the delay here, but I edited the infobox to reflect the dimensions of the overall memorial structure. -JJonahJackalope (talk) 13:00, 28 June 2021 (UTC)[reply]
All good. I am passing this as GA as I consider that it meets the relevant criteria. Cheers, Zawed (talk) 08:35, 29 June 2021 (UTC)[reply]
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