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Talk:Somalia at the 2000 Summer Olympics/GA1

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GA Review

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Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: MrLinkinPark333 (talk · contribs) 20:15, 14 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]


Hello there. I've reviewed a X country at Y Olympics article before for GA (Afghanistan at the 2016 Summer Olympics), so I might as well do another one.

Rate Attribute Review Comment
1. Well-written:
1a. the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct. run on businessmen and permission sentence that needs to be split into two sentences for grammar. Same with Aden's qualification and why he was the only athlete to qualify.checkY
1b. it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation. instances of "however", "though" and "despite" per words to watchcheckY
2. Verifiable with no original research:
2a. it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline. no issue here.
2b. reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose). all looks good. i had to check Christian Science Monitor to be sure.
2c. it contains no original research. sports reference doesn't state that Aden is a middle distance runner nor Hussein is a sprinter, while the Newsweek source has two issues but might be due to different version of the article (see below). Other unverified parts include 1976 boycott because of New Zealand, Sydney being Somalia's 5th olympic appearance, boycotting 1992 because of famine, and Sydney being Hussein's only ever olympic competition.checkY
2d. it contains no copyright violations or plagiarism. close paraphrasing in the businessmen, permission and aden's qualification part. I think the buinessmen part won't pass WP:LIMITED, while the permission part might as long as the word order is changed. However, aden's qualification definetly won't pass limited. Originally was at ? before i found the Aden sentencecheckY
3. Broad in its coverage:
3a. it addresses the main aspects of the topic. mentioning who won the medals for the men's 1500 metres moves the focus away from Aden to the medalists and should not be included (as they were not from Somalia either).checkY
3b. it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style). Not sure if the amount of athletes/countries is needed either as this is about somalia, not the entire olympics.checkY
4. Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each. no per words to watch as stated above.
5. Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute. no issues with stability
6. Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio:
6a. media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content. not applicable
6b. media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions. not applicable
7. Overall assessment. not yet. grammar, words to watch/neturality and main aspect issues are quick corrections while close paraphrasing and OR/inaccuracies are bigger issues.

Lead

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All is good apart from the sea of blue (but does not effect the ga review).

Background

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Paragraph one

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Paragraph two

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Athletics

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Paragraph one

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  • "Aden was the sole Somali athlete to qualify for the Olympics because no other competitor had the opportunity to travel outside of the country during 2000 to participate and record a time at a major competition". - Run on sentence. Suggestion to split into two sentences and trim "to travel outside of the country during 2000 to participate" part.
  • I think the wording of Aden's heat placing, overall placing, and elimination makes it sounds like he was eliminated cause he was 0.58 seconds behind the slowest person overall, and not his heat race

Paragraph two

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  • "first and only Summer Olympiad" - sounds WP:CRYSTAL with "only" - yes it was her first Olympics and she hasn't comepeted as of 2019, but she could compete in future years.
  • As the flagbearer sports reference page doesn't say Hussein's name specifically, I recommend bundling the two sports reference citations together to show that she competed in 2000 and was the first woman for Somalia.
  • How did Hussein enter the Olympics if she didn't qualify for the Olympics?
  • Per the Aden heat placing above, "slowest runner" should be reworded to state slowest runner to qualify in her heat, not overall
  • Note to self: need to verify Newsweek statement - For some reason, I was not able to find the Newsweek article via Gale (despite having December 12, 1994 onwards full text coverage). In any sense, I found a copy here. If there's a discrepancy between the gale copy (which i don't have) and the online copy per below, let me know and i'll request the gale version via Resource Exchange.
  • Minor correction: Hussein was 20.15 seconds, not 20.10 seconds slower than the last qualifier. Lee Naylor qualified with 53.10 as Hussein finished with 1:13:25.

Other stuff I should mention but does not effect GA review

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  • There are sea of blue instances in the lead and background for Aden and Hussein.checkY

Overall

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This article has some issues, some minor and some major. For minor issues, there are a few grammar issues and netural/words to watch issues. Similarly, there is a little bit out of scope (medalists in the 1500 mens event) and too much detail (number of countries/athletes). One of the main issues are the close paraphrasing - some of which could pass WP:LIMITED but one part i feel would not. Another big issue is the unverified statements, whether it be the specific wording of the sources or the sources not matching the statement at all (e.g. middle distance runner for Aden). As most of the issues seem like quick fixes, with others being like they could be fixed with some work, I'm willing to put this on hold for a week and see from there. Feel free to comment in this review which ones you've gone through and if you have any additional comments on any of the points above.

--MrLinkinPark333 (talk) 20:15, 14 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]