Talk:Sober (Inna song)/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Kyle Peake (talk · contribs) 16:05, 29 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Good Article review progress box

Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()

3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()

Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

Good to meet again, I'll review this soon --Kyle Peake (talk) 16:05, 29 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox and lead

Use bullet points instead for any hlist
Streaming is not cited anywhere in the body; the ref only links to iTunes Stores, so either add another ref to back this up or remove the streaming info.

Streaming is a more and more relevant format nowadays, so I think it should definitely be mentioned here. The reference links to Apple Music where each release can also be simply streamed. I think this suffices. Cartoon network freak (talk) 07:00, 31 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

"solely handled by Walcher under" → "solely handled by Walcher, under"
"Lyrically, it discusses a lonely person's wish" → "Lyrically, the former discusses a lonely person wishing"
"The former was directed" → "The first video was directed" since there is no former
"their artists in private settings" → "their artists in private home settings" to give further context but not overkill either

Background and composition

"solely handled by Walcher under" → "solely handled by Walcher, under"
Either add a citation that verifies streaming release for both here and Release history, or remove that info.

see comment above. Cartoon network freak (talk) 07:00, 31 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

"Musically, "Sober" utilizes a" → "Musically, the track utilizes a"
"its predecessor, "Not My Baby" (2020)" → ""its predecessor, "Not My Baby", from earlier that year"
"can be heard, a "powerful" yet" → "can be heard, as well as a "powerful" yet"
"which prominently utilizes" → "that prominently utilizes"
"is used throughout" → "is used throughout the track" to specify that it's not throughout the chops
"and to personally connect with" → "and personally connect with"
"Inna sings "Is it" → "Inna sings, "Is it"
"consists of the lines "I just" → "consists of the lines, "I just"

Critical reception

"Upon release, "Sober" was received with positive reviews by" → ""Sober" was met with positive reviews from"
"While Modestas Mankus of" → "Modestas Mankus of"
"CelebMix's Jonathan Currinn also praised" → "while CelebMix's Jonathan Currinn also praised" since this is correct ordering for usage of "while"
"lyrical message which he tought fitted" → "lyrical message, which he thought fitted"
"delivery gave it a sense" → "delivery gave the song a sense"
Italicise MuuMuse
"deemed "Sober" a "surefire smash" and" → "deemed it a "surefire smash" and"
"whilst further praising its" → "whilst further praising the"

Music videos

"An accompanying music video for "Sober" was" → "An accompanying music video was"
"and Loops Production as the producers" → "and Loops Production received credit as the producers" for grammar fixes
"The music video was part of" → "The visual was part of"
"whose scope was to present their artists" → "which had the scope of presenting the label's music artists"
"the shoot as being unconventional since it" → "the shooting as being unconventional, since it"
"bath, bed and a chair" → "bath, bed, and a chair"
"CelebMix's Currinn deemed Inna's appearance" → "Currinn deemed Inna's appearance"
"to the one in her 2011" → "to the one for her 2011"
"was also released 21 May 2020, and was edited" → "was released on 21 May 2020 and had been edited"

Credits and personnel

Sure you can't add this?

There are not so many credits either way, and all have already been mentioned in the article's body. I don't think this section would be relevant here. Cartoon network freak (talk) 07:08, 31 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Track listing

Good

Release history

Good, apart from the streaming issue I have already explained

See my comment above. Cartoon network freak (talk) 07:08, 31 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

References

Use Fix dead links to archive all of these
Copyvio score is at 30.1%; that's great
Remove "on iTunes" from the titles on ref 2; but keep the publisher the same for all, though add region in brackets; example: iTunes Store (GB)
MOS:QWQ issues in the titles of refs 4 and 7
Ref 6 is missing MuuMuse for the work/website parameter
Remove wikilink to YouTube on ref 9

Final comments and verdict

On hold for now, changes should not be too hard to fix. --Kyle Peake (talk) 18:12, 29 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@Kyle Peake: Thank you very much for the review, I have addressed the comments apart from where I commented. Greets;

✓ Pass! --Kyle Peake (talk) 07:46, 31 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]