Talk:Salt/GA1
GA Review
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Reviewing |
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Reviewer: Quadell (talk · contribs) 19:54, 8 October 2013 (UTC)
Nominator: Cwmhiraeth
Round 1
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Salt is a tremendous topic that everyone knows something about, but few are experts on. It will be a large undertaking to get an article on salt both complete and balanced. I'll level with you: the article will need a lot of work before it attains GA status. But if anyone's up to the task, I figure it's you, Cwmhiraeth. I can't promise to be an easy reviewer for this article, but I can promise to be fair, patient, and consistent. I'll start with the largest issues that will take the most work, and go back through for details once these are addressed. If you disagree with any of my recommendations, let me know and we'll discuss it. I'm not inflexible; like you, my main concern is making the Salt article the best it can be.
Let me know how you wish to proceed. All the best, – Quadell (talk) 19:54, 8 October 2013 (UTC)
This is going so well, that I'm going to start mentioning more minor concerns below. The points above should probably be addressed first, however. – Quadell (talk) 16:53, 10 October 2013 (UTC)
It looks like once the images are selected and the lead is improved, we'll be ready for round two! (Unless there are a few stragglers above that I missed.) – Quadell (talk) 12:10, 14 October 2013 (UTC)
(Just to let you know what to expect, once the "course grained" issues have been dealt with above, I'll go through for a more "fined grained" review. I expect round 2 will be easier than round 1, and I won't put you through a third round.) |
Round 2
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Regarding my reviewing style, issues I identify below will be prepended by the number of the relevant GA criterion. As they are resolved, I will cross out the issue number. Comments that are not actionable requirements are not prepended.
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- It is reasonably well written.
- It is factually accurate and verifiable.
- a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
- All issues resolved.
- a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
- It is broad in its coverage.
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- It follows the neutral point of view policy.
- Fair representation without bias:
- All issues resolved.
- Fair representation without bias:
- It is stable.
- No edit wars, etc.:
- No edit wars, etc.:
- It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- All issues resolved.
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- Overall:
- Pass/Fail:
- I am quite impressed with how this article turned out. It passes all our GA criteria, and I'm happy to promote it. – Quadell (talk) 18:21, 18 October 2013 (UTC)
- Pass/Fail:
- Thank you for your very thorough review. The article has changed quite a bit under your guidance and I learned quite a lot, especially during the last part when we were working on the health effects section which was quite an eye-opener to me. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 19:06, 18 October 2013 (UTC)
Additional input regarding health effects
[edit]- The section on the technical aspects of the health effects of salt looked amateurish to me, so I have tried to improve it with some copy-editing. Of course, sourcing for medical topics are subject to the higher standards of WP:Medicine. Apart from the higher standards of WP:Medicine, I think that batched references as used here are not suitable for WP:V, so the batch of four references for one reference point may not be suitable. I have asked on members of WP:Medicine to have a look in a message on the WikiProject's talk page. Snowman (talk) 11:16, 16 October 2013 (UTC)
- Thank you for your valuable improvements to the "Health effects" section, Snowmanradio! You might be interested in the new Health effects of salt article, which is in a far worse condition. The bundled reference regarding national guidelines was my own edit, and I'm not terribly attached to it; if anyone de-bundles them into separate references, it won't effect the GA nomination. But I will note that the guideline Wikipedia:Citing sources recommends "A string of independent citations may also be aesthetically unappealing, so consider bundling them into one." WP:CITEBUNDLE is pretty clear that either option is fine. All the best, – Quadell (talk) 12:33, 16 October 2013 (UTC)
- "... although others state the risk is minimal for typical western diets." I will be grateful if you could guide me to one of the bundled references, so that I can more easily verify this part of the line. Snowman (talk) 19:29, 16 October 2013 (UTC)
- I'm not sure. (It was originally five references side-by-side in the text, which I simply made into one. I did not read and verify each source.) The entire "health effects" section is an attempt by the nominator to summarize the more verbose information which was moved to Health effects of salt. More information is there, and that article links to secondary sources such as [1] and primary sources such as [2], which includes among its conclusions: "the long-term effects of reduced salt intake on blood pressure, mortality, and morbidity in a population with and without hypertension remain undefined". I'm not sure if that can be seen as supporting the statement or not.
- Of course the article should give statements that are as accurate as possible about the most up-to-date research on the health effects of salt. Any help you would like to give would be welcome, I'm sure. – Quadell (talk) 20:41, 16 October 2013 (UTC)
- Behind the Headlines: Is salt good for you? by NICE explains one newspaper report. The other source is from 2009, and I would think that an newer source could be used. Salt reduction strategy could prevent thousands of deaths from CVD, says NICE, 2013, is by NICE. SIGN also has some evidence that looks convincing. Any comments? Snowman (talk) 22:02, 16 October 2013 (UTC)
- NICE is certainly reliable, but the 2009 meta-analysis seems (to this layman) to be based on a wider array of data. It's pretty clear that the previous messy version of "health effects" was the result of a back-and-forth disagreement between "Should people reduce their salt?" partisans. I have no dog in that fight, but I think it's important that the brief summary here give respect to both sides (though only in so far as both sides are actually supported by RSes). I'd feel more comfortable if there were more opinions from medically-knowledgeable people here, and I thank you for leaving the comment at the wikiproject. – Quadell (talk) 22:33, 16 October 2013 (UTC)
- The 2009 study is a meta-analysis of 11 trials and SIGN describes a meta-analysis of 28 trials (see under "4.2 Reducing dietary salt" on the linked webpage). Snowman (talk) 23:11, 16 October 2013 (UTC)
- NICE is certainly reliable, but the 2009 meta-analysis seems (to this layman) to be based on a wider array of data. It's pretty clear that the previous messy version of "health effects" was the result of a back-and-forth disagreement between "Should people reduce their salt?" partisans. I have no dog in that fight, but I think it's important that the brief summary here give respect to both sides (though only in so far as both sides are actually supported by RSes). I'd feel more comfortable if there were more opinions from medically-knowledgeable people here, and I thank you for leaving the comment at the wikiproject. – Quadell (talk) 22:33, 16 October 2013 (UTC)
- Behind the Headlines: Is salt good for you? by NICE explains one newspaper report. The other source is from 2009, and I would think that an newer source could be used. Salt reduction strategy could prevent thousands of deaths from CVD, says NICE, 2013, is by NICE. SIGN also has some evidence that looks convincing. Any comments? Snowman (talk) 22:02, 16 October 2013 (UTC)
- "... although others state the risk is minimal for typical western diets." I will be grateful if you could guide me to one of the bundled references, so that I can more easily verify this part of the line. Snowman (talk) 19:29, 16 October 2013 (UTC)
- thedea.org is used as a source in the health section, but I am not convinced that it is RS on the Wiki. Any comments? Snowman (talk) 21:42, 16 October 2013 (UTC)
- I would tend to agree. – Quadell (talk) 22:33, 16 October 2013 (UTC)
"thedea.org" is someone's self-published website and can't be considered WP:MEDRS.
Zad68
02:53, 17 October 2013 (UTC)- Update. This ref supported the line on acute water intoxication, which did not seem within the scope of the article. I have removed the whole line and the ref. Snowman (talk) 13:20, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
Notes on health from Zad68
[edit]section rewritten now so these notes are moot
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Quadell asked me to review the health effects section. I looked through about half of it and stopped. I have significant concerns about this section. Overall I mostly do not see the kinds of sources I expect to see to support biomedical information, and I saw at least a few cases where the content was not representing the sources accurately. Salt and health is very well studied and it should be easy to locate top-quality sources. The fact that two of the refs had broken URLs (Food Safety Authority of Ireland, which I fixed, and Safety data for sodium chloride The Physical and Theoretical Chemistry Laboratory of Oxford University, which has been taken offline) made me concerned that the sources really were not checked.
I really think this section needs to be reworked thoroughly before I'd be comfortable listing this article as GA.
Suggested sources for health update[edit]
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Diet and health
[edit]After some great collaboration, I'm happy with it now, except for one bit of content I could not verify against the source. I've tagged it, can you help me find that so we can clear that up and get rid of that tag? Other than that, looks good. I also moved it up to the section on salt used as food, and made some suggested changes to how the images are done. Feel free to tweak further or undo those. Let me know with a ping if you need anything else! Zad68
17:13, 18 October 2013 (UTC)
- So the article content is "In the United States, 77% of the sodium eaten comes from processed and restaurant foods, 11% from cooking and table use and the rest from what is found naturally in foodstuffs." sourced to www
.cdc .gov /salt /food .htm... sorry I just didn't see those states located at that URL, am I just blind or something? Zad68
17:35, 18 October 2013 (UTC) - Yes I am just blind, duh, fixing...
Zad68
17:36, 18 October 2013 (UTC) - Done tag removed, don't mind me.
Zad68
17:38, 18 October 2013 (UTC)