Talk:Raymond Howard (Wiccan)/Archive 1

Archive 1

Cammell or Campbell?

He claimed that when living in Norwood Hill, Surrey, the racer Donald Cammell rubbed the head of Atho for luck before making his attempts to break the world land speed record.

Something odd here. Donald Cammell was into spiritualism. But Donald Campbell was the racing champion. Valetude (talk) 23:03, 30 November 2015 (UTC)

It's definitely Donald Campbell - I've corrected this in the article. Midnightblueowl (talk) 20:33, 6 August 2016 (UTC)

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Raymond Howard (Wiccan)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: MWright96 (talk · contribs) 18:47, 24 August 2016 (UTC)

Going to review this article. MWright96 (talk) 18:47, 24 August 2016 (UTC)

1. It is reasonably well written.

   a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):

2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.

   a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):

3. It is broad in its coverage.

   a (major aspects): b (focused):

4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.

   Fair representation without bias:

5. It is stable.

   No edit wars, etc.:

6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.

   a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):

7. Overall:

   Pass/Fail:

Biography

• "This was up the road from Dumbledene," - up the road sounds informal
  • Changed to "located near to". Midnightblueowl (talk) 11:13, 25 August 2016 (UTC)

• "and they had placed an advert" - advertisement
  • Done. Midnightblueowl (talk) 11:13, 25 August 2016 (UTC)

The Coven of Atho

• "and taught "Eight Paths of Magick", which was similar to the Eightfold Path taught in Gardnerian Wicca." - reptition of "taught"
  • Changed first "taught" to "promulgated". Midnightblueowl (talk) 11:11, 25 August 2016 (UTC)

• "the racer Donald Campbell" - clarify what sort of racer Campbell was
  • Replaced with "race car driver". Midnightblueowl (talk) 11:11, 25 August 2016 (UTC)

• remove the hyphen from cash-box
  • Done. Midnightblueowl (talk) 11:11, 25 August 2016 (UTC)

References

• no dead links

Overall a good read. On hold. MWright96 (talk) 20:16, 24 August 2016 (UTC)

Many thanks for the review, MWright96! Midnightblueowl (talk) 11:13, 25 August 2016 (UTC)

Midnightblueowl Thanks. I agree with the suggestions you have raised. Promoting to GA class. MWright96 (talk) 11:31, 25 August 2016 (UTC)