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GA Review

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Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 16:27, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]


I'll finish this review today, or as soon as I can JAGUAR  16:27, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Initial comments

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Lead

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  • "...is a 2012 Indian Telugu action film directed by Sampath Nandi. He co-wrote the film's script along with Paruchuri Brothers" - may sound better as is a 2012 Indian Telugu action film directed by Sampath Nandi and co-written by the Paruchuri Brothers or something similar? It's just so that the prose is tightened
Done. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 16:53, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "under their banner Megaa Super Good Films, It features Ram Charan" - 'it' doesn't need to be capitalised
Rephrased. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 16:53, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "who make crucial cameo appearance" - a crucial cameo appearance. Just curious, is a cameo appearance crucial to the film?
Yes. Both the cameos are crucial to the film. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 16:53, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The film focuses on the attempts made by Raj to woo a medico" - might be just me, but I never understood what 'woo' means. Also, can medico be linked to medical student (if that's correct)?
Rephrased and linked. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 16:53, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The film received four nominations at 60th Filmfare Awards South" - at the 60th
Done. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 16:53, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "but could not win any" - would sound better as but did not win any
Done. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 16:53, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • The lead needs to be slightly better re-organised in order to comply per WP:LEAD. I would recommend merging one paragraph into another as that would create a better flow. I was originally going to suggest the plot paragraph be merged into the first one, but I think that the last paragraph of the lead would simply be better off being merged with the one before it?
Yes, but i divided them so for easy reading. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 16:53, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Body

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  • "Raju (Ram Charan) is a Hyderabad-based betting fetish" - I don't understand what this means? Could be re-worded to gambler?
Rephrased as you said. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 16:53, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • " who support his means of living" - supports
Done. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 16:53, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "She was confirmed to play the role of a rich brat who falls for a poor guy" - informal here
Rephrased. But, not sure that l'm right. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 16:53, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "adding that i would be an impactful one" - it
Done. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 16:53, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Charan and Tamannaah were filming for a song sequence on a boat and the park's deputy director Sanjay Kumar insisted that the duo should use life jackets" - would sound better as Charan and Tamannaah were filming for a song sequence on a boat when the park's deputy director Sanjay Kumar insisted that the duo should use life jackets
Done. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 16:53, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "After few arguments" - might sound better as "after some disagreements"
Rephrased. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 16:53, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • " After completing shoot for the song Dillaku Dillaku" - the shoot
Rephrased. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 16:53, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]

References

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On hold

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This is a well researched and comprehensive article, but I did spot some prose issues along the way. It shouldn't be too hard to address them, so once they're all clarified then this should have no problem passing. Thanks! JAGUAR  16:46, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]

@Jaguar: All issues have been addressed. Please have a look and suggest further changes required if any. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 16:53, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you for addressing them, Pavan! The article now meets the GA criteria so I'll be passing JAGUAR  19:37, 26 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks for reviewing the article. Pavanjandhyala (talk) 01:16, 27 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]