Talk:Presidential transition of Joe Biden
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Material from Presidential transition of Joe Biden was split to COVID-19 Advisory Board on 2020.11.09 from this version. The former page's history now serves to provide attribution for that content in the latter page, and it must not be deleted so long as the latter page exists. Please leave this template in place to link the article histories and preserve this attribution. |
Article issues and concerns
[edit]- There are some issues that need addressing.
- 1)- The lead is long with five paragraphs.
"As a general rule of thumb, a lead section should contain no more than four well-composed paragraphs and be carefully sourced as appropriate."
I am a proponent that the lead is a summary of sourced content found in the body of the article so not suggesting a need to source lead content. - 2)- The "Transition activities" section includes subsections:
- White House Staff
- Office of Communications
- Office of the Vice President
- Office of the First Lady
- Domestic policy
- Economic policy
- Environment and energy
- Foreign affairs and national security
- Health policy, and
- Science and technology policy
- These subsections are overly expanded and presented in a gallery form and cause distraction. Many of these have "File:No image.svg". Although possibly great for future expansion they clutter the page. Many of these entries duplicate what can be found just by linking to the appropriate article. If this content is deemed important then possibly presented in some template form with image thumbnails would be better.
- 3)- Sources: The redundant use of the same sources is not necessary.
- 4)- The "See also" section has 15 entries. Some "editorial judgment" may be required to determine noteworthy transitions over just an indiscriminate list.
-- Otr500 (talk) 13:12, 21 July 2021 (UTC)
Personal intro and additional staff
[edit]This edit request by an editor with a conflict of interest has now been answered. |
Hello editors, my name is Cameron. I'm a spokesperson for the Biden-Harris transition team, and have joined Wikipedia to make some suggestions for this article. I've read up on the rules for editors with a Conflict of Interest. My work at this phase is in a volunteer capacity for the transition team, which has wrapped up its formal work. I saw some inaccuracies and gaps in the content, and want to help the editing community make improvements by providing sources and suggesting content. I've added the connected contributor banner to the article above, and will not make any direct edits myself. I'm looking forward to working with the Wikipedia community, and hope to make valuable contributions.
- For my first request, I prepared a list of transition staff members who are absent from the current Transition Team section. I understand that not every staff member can be listed, but these represent those who held roles that should be captured:
- Yohannes Abraham, director of day-to-day operations, former staffer in the Obama White House.[1]
- Cecilia Muñoz, former director of the White House Domestic Policy Council under President Obama[2]
- Avril Haines, national security and foreign policy, former principal deputy national security adviser and deputy director of the CIA.[1]
- Suzy George, served as an aide to former Secretary of State Madeleine Albright.[3]
- Awenate Cobbina, director of operations, chair of Michigan Economic Development Corporation[4]
- Lisa Monaco, homeland security adviser, homeland security adviser under the Obama administration[5]
References
- ^ a b Mucha, Sarah (June 20, 2020). "Biden officially forms transition team". CNN. Retrieved September 7, 2021.
- ^ Fox, Ben; Spagat, Elliot (November 11, 2020). "Some big, early shifts on immigration expected under Biden". The Associated Press. Retrieved September 21, 2021.
- ^ Lee, Matthew (January 16, 2021). "Biden fills out State Department team with Obama veterans". Associated Press. Retrieved September 7, 2021.
- ^ Nagl, Kurt (May 14, 2021). "Awenate Cobbina reflects on the art of the transition". Crain's Detroit Business. Retrieved September 17, 2021.
- ^ Zeleny, Jeff; LeBlanc, Paul (January 15, 2021). "Biden taps Lisa Monaco as homeland security adviser to inauguration amid rising threats". CNN. Retrieved September 17, 2021.
- One other minor item, I saw that the second paragraph of COVID-19 Advisory Board does not have a citation. These two articles from The New York Times could support that content: article one, article two.
Thank you for taking the time to review. Please let me know if you have any questions or feedback.
Cameron
- Noting that I've added the request edit template. JBRPT Cameron (talk) 15:08, 16 December 2021 (UTC)
- Done @JBRPT Cameron:, thank you for properly disclosing your COI and agreeing not to directly edit the pages. These additions seem straightforward to me. – Muboshgu (talk) 16:12, 17 December 2021 (UTC)
Additional staffers and cabinet appointments
[edit]This edit request by an editor with a conflict of interest has now been answered. |
Hello, Cameron here again with another request on behalf of the Biden-Harris Transition Team. As a reminder, I am in a volunteer capacity as the transition team has wrapped up its formal work. I've fully disclosed my COI and will not directly edit the article. My goal is to help improve this article by identifying content gaps and inaccuracies.
There are a few more names missing from the cabinet appointees and staffers, and one out of place.
Extended content
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References
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I'll be happy to answer any questions you may have.
Muboshgu, Thank you for your assistance with my first edit request. If you're available to review another, your feedback is welcome.
Thank you for considering my request, JBRPT Cameron (talk) 17:45, 13 January 2022 (UTC)
- JBRPT Cameron, hi. Sorry I saw your previous ping but forgot to respond to it. I can take a look at this later today, if nobody else beats me to it. – Muboshgu (talk) 17:48, 13 January 2022 (UTC)
- @Muboshgu: Hi - Following up here, I appreciate you looking into this, thanks! If there is anything I can do to help, please let me know. Best, JBRPT Cameron (talk) 19:10, 19 January 2022 (UTC)
- JBRPT Cameron, the ping is the reminder that I needed. I'll look into this today. – Muboshgu (talk) 19:22, 19 January 2022 (UTC)
- @Muboshgu: Hi - Following up here, I appreciate you looking into this, thanks! If there is anything I can do to help, please let me know. Best, JBRPT Cameron (talk) 19:10, 19 January 2022 (UTC)
- Done I don't know if there's any intended method of ordering of them. It doesn't appear that these sections are ordered alphabetically or by date announced. – Muboshgu (talk) 22:52, 21 January 2022 (UTC)
- @Muboshgu: Thank you, no method of ordering here. The additions look great. JBRPT Cameron (talk) 13:55, 25 January 2022 (UTC)
Content additions and article structure
[edit]This edit request by an editor with a conflict of interest has now been answered. |
Hello again editors! Cameron from the Biden-Harris Transition Team again with another set of requests. This one is a bit larger, and I'm happy to work through these in chunks if that's easier. As a reminder, I am seeking these changes on Wikipedia as a volunteer for the Transition Team. I have not been paid for my contributions, but due to my COI I will not make any direct edits to the article.
- The introduction only mentions one of the co-chairs, I suggest adding the others: Kaufman was joined by co-chairs Jeffrey Zients, Anita Dunn, Michelle Lujan Grisham, and Cedric Richmond.
- In Transition activities, there are some areas of the transition that are not covered. I'm suggesting this content with the hope that we can give readers a more complete and balanced picture of what the transition team worked on prior to the inauguration:
Additions for Transition activities
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References
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- Lastly, I propose reorganizing the article somewhat for flow. All of the changes are to main sections, there would be no changes to subsection organization:
- Background issues
- Timeline (swapped position with Transition procedures)
- Transition procedures
- Transition team (swapped position with Transition activities)
- Transition activities
- Financing
- See also
- References
- External links
I defer to editors if my suggested content is appropriate, and understand that changes might be made. Muboshgu, as always, you're invited to review these changes if you're available.
If you have any questions, please feel free to reach out. Thank you for considering, JBRPT Cameron (talk) 14:01, 25 January 2022 (UTC)
- Hi JBRPT Cameron: Sorry for the delay. If you're still around, please Go ahead: I have reviewed these proposed changes and suggest that you go ahead and make the proposed changes to the page. But make sure that the edits you implement are as per this request. Leave an appropriate edit summary when prompted to and when you're done with the edits, please ping me so I can review the edits after implementation. For additional edits not already requested, feel free to add another request on this page. Thanks! —CX Zoom[he/him] (let's talk • C • L) 23:21, 11 April 2022 (UTC)
- Marking this as answered, per above. Z1720 (talk) 23:21, 12 October 2022 (UTC)
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