Talk:Pokémon Channel/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Buffbills7701 (talk · contribs) 22:14, 10 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Unreferenced Sentences

"...a similar digital pet-type game where the player plays with a Pikachu—and promote the Nintendo e-Reader peripheral device."
- That's in the IGN article. Easy to miss, I guess. Tezero (talk) 00:52, 11 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  - Done
"The game was first announced at Electronic Entertainment Expo (E3) 2003."
- Also in the IGN article referenced a bit later. Tezero (talk) 00:52, 11 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  - Done

Other notes

"The game was first announced at Electronic Entertainment Expo (E3) 2003." Shouldn't in be added in making it "Electronic Entertainment Expo (E3)in 2003"?
- It's usually known as "E3 (year)", e.g. "E3 2003". Should I switch it up to "E3 (Electronic Entertainment Expo) 2003"? Tezero (talk) 00:52, 11 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  - Nope, it's fine. buff bills 7701 02:09, 11 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]
"17. Ambrella. Pokémon Channel. "Oak: Oh? What was that cry?"" Should the references just quote parts of the game?
- As far as I know, that's appropriate for plot sections of game articles; it's a common format. Many GAs' and FAs' plot sections don't cite anything at all. Tezero (talk) 00:52, 11 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  - Done buff bills 7701 02:09, 11 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Why is there a picture of the Pokémon Mini in the section about the development of the game? The section doesn't mention the Mini at all.
- Yeah, to be honest I kinda just put it there because the paragraphs were short. Would a picture of the e-Reader fit better? Or nothing, and I just find a way to combine them? Tezero (talk) 00:52, 11 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  - Yeah, the picture of the e-reader would be better. buffbills7701 02:09, 11 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]
    - Done. Tezero (talk) 02:49, 11 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]
"...making it the thirteenth best-selling game during the week from July 14 to July 20." WP:FANCRUFT. I'm positive no one cares how good it was during a week.
- That week is significant, but I can see how that might not have been apparent. (It was the week of the game's release in Japan; I haven't found any more reliable sales information, including from Japan.) Rephrased. Tezero (talk) 00:52, 11 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]
- "During the week from..." is bad grammar. Perhaps "During the week of..." would work better?
  - Fixed during the rephrasing. Tezero (talk) 00:52, 11 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]
    - Done buff bills 7701 02:09, 11 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Verdict

I've decided to put this article on hold for a week. buff bills 7701 22:14, 10 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]

The article passes. Congrats! buff bills 7701 12:09, 11 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]