Talk:Persoonia terminalis/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 19:01, 8 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

I'll be happy to review this (also my 350th review, by coincidence) JAGUAR 19:01, 8 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Oh and I just realised this is the 5,000,000th article! JAGUAR 19:05, 8 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Initial comments

"Initially considered to be a subspecies of P. nutans" - should Persoonia nutans be fully written out? I see it's abbreviated elsewhere in the article, so feel free to ignore if I'm wrong. It is, however, not abbreviated in the Taxonomy section

yeah, can go either way here. These names often get abbreviated when it is clear it is a species of the same genus. As it is early in the article makes sense to unabbreviate Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 19:32, 8 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

"and are followed thereafter by purple-striped green fleshy drupes" - I'm not sure if "fleshy" sounds a bit informal here

You'll see the word in botanical texts. It means that the fruit has flesh (like a peach). However I concede that "drupe" means this as well...hence it is tautological. Just realised the "stone fruit" is there for meaning, so removed "fleshy" Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 19:32, 8 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

The lead could be expanded slightly in order to summarise the article. For example, Persoonia terminalis first being treated in 1981 isn't mentioned in the lead

added a bit...big enough now? Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 20:00, 8 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

"although occasional flowers have been seen to July" - in July?

hmm, it means they can occur any time up to July (from January...) Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 19:37, 8 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

"A proportion of flowers do have a true leaf instead" - 'do' sounds redundant

yeah, a bit forced....so removed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 19:43, 8 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

"Hardy to heavy frosts, P. terminalis is expected to fare better in a temperate rather than subtropical garden climate" - the beginning of the sentence doesn't make sense

hardy is an adjective of P. terminalis not frosts, but changed it anyway thusly Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 19:42, 8 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

"which lies dormant in the soil" - the reference given here doesn't mention that terminalis lies dormant in soil

If you look on page 237 of the ref, it has a code 'II'. The key is given on page 224. Took me a while to ferret them out... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 19:39, 8 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

References

No dead links

On hold

Well done on writing the fifth millionth article, I didn't realise what I stumbled on after I took the review! This is a well written and comprehensive article, although I spotted a couple of minor things. I'm not that knowledgeable in flora, so please forgive me if I made any misunderstandings. Once all of the above are addressed then this should be good to go. JAGUAR 19:29, 8 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for addressing them! The article has improved a lot and now meets the GA criteria.

JAGUAR 20:12, 8 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]