Talk:Persoonia terminalis/GA1
GA Review
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Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 19:01, 8 November 2015 (UTC)
I'll be happy to review this (also my 350th review, by coincidence) JAGUAR 19:01, 8 November 2015 (UTC)
Oh and I just realised this is the 5,000,000th article! JAGUAR 19:05, 8 November 2015 (UTC)
Initial comments
[edit]- "Initially considered to be a subspecies of P. nutans" - should Persoonia nutans be fully written out? I see it's abbreviated elsewhere in the article, so feel free to ignore if I'm wrong. It is, however, not abbreviated in the Taxonomy section
- yeah, can go either way here. These names often get abbreviated when it is clear it is a species of the same genus. As it is early in the article makes sense to unabbreviate Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 19:32, 8 November 2015 (UTC)
- "and are followed thereafter by purple-striped green fleshy drupes" - I'm not sure if "fleshy" sounds a bit informal here
- You'll see the word in botanical texts. It means that the fruit has flesh (like a peach). However I concede that "drupe" means this as well...hence it is tautological. Just realised the "stone fruit" is there for meaning, so removed "fleshy" Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 19:32, 8 November 2015 (UTC)
- The lead could be expanded slightly in order to summarise the article. For example, Persoonia terminalis first being treated in 1981 isn't mentioned in the lead
- added a bit...big enough now? Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 20:00, 8 November 2015 (UTC)
- "although occasional flowers have been seen to July" - in July?
- hmm, it means they can occur any time up to July (from January...) Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 19:37, 8 November 2015 (UTC)
- "A proportion of flowers do have a true leaf instead" - 'do' sounds redundant
- yeah, a bit forced....so removed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 19:43, 8 November 2015 (UTC)
- "Hardy to heavy frosts, P. terminalis is expected to fare better in a temperate rather than subtropical garden climate" - the beginning of the sentence doesn't make sense
- hardy is an adjective of P. terminalis not frosts, but changed it anyway thusly Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 19:42, 8 November 2015 (UTC)
- "which lies dormant in the soil" - the reference given here doesn't mention that terminalis lies dormant in soil
- If you look on page 237 of the ref, it has a code 'II'. The key is given on page 224. Took me a while to ferret them out... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 19:39, 8 November 2015 (UTC)
References
[edit]On hold
[edit]Well done on writing the fifth millionth article, I didn't realise what I stumbled on after I took the review! This is a well written and comprehensive article, although I spotted a couple of minor things. I'm not that knowledgeable in flora, so please forgive me if I made any misunderstandings. Once all of the above are addressed then this should be good to go. JAGUAR 19:29, 8 November 2015 (UTC)
- Thank you for addressing them! The article has improved a lot and now meets the GA criteria.
JAGUAR 20:12, 8 November 2015 (UTC)