Talk:Osa Maliki/GA1
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Reviewer: Kavyansh.Singh (talk · contribs) 10:12, 2 January 2022 (UTC)
Nominator The man from Gianyar (talk · contribs) at 14:28, 12 December 2021 (UTC)
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Comments
[edit]General
[edit]- Following terms are wiki-linked multiple times in the article. Suggesting to import this script. They should be linked only twice——once in the lead section, and once in the prose:
Detailed
[edit]During the Japanese occupation
(both in the lead and the "Early life" section) — specify "Japanese occupation of of the Dutch East Indies"
- Italicize Kenpeitai
In an independent Indonesia, he remained active in politics
— should be "In an independent Indonesia, he remained an active politician"
- The "Early life" section should be split in "Early life" and "Early career".
Half done – The early life section is a bit too short to be split up, imo. I've changed the section's heading to Early life and career to compensate. Cheers, The man from Gianyar (talk) 03:17, 20 January 2022 (UTC)
Little is known of his early life, but he was educated in a
— should be "Little is known of his early life; he was educated in a"
- The article writes it as "Indonesian Communist Party", but our wiki-article states the common/formal name to be "Communist Party of Indonesia".
in the failed
— "in the unsuccessful"
In the aftermath, Osa was
— "Subsequently, Osa was"
and sentenced to jail
— would "imprisoned" work?
During his time in Boven-Digoel, Osa spent his free time
— repetition of "time"
earning a salary of 17,5 Gulden
— the comma should be decimal. And suggesting to use Template:inflation.
BPI
— is never again used in the article. Do we need to define the abbreviation?
he studied mass communication abroad
— in which country? do the sources discuss this?
Following the proclamation of independence and the beginning of the Indonesian National Revolution, he served in the newly formed provincial government of the province of West Java.
— this is repeated information. Already mentioned in the immediately previous section
and later the Indonesian National Party (PNI), after the Kediri Congress in 1946.
— "and after the Kediri Congress in 1946, he joined the Indonesian National Party (PNI)."
he studied mass communication abroad.
— Repeated information.
between 28 August and 1 September 1963
— 'between' or 'from'?
President Sukarno gave a speech. In the speech, Sukarno chided party
— "President Sukarno gave a speech; he chided party"
6 members
— "six members"
Suharto then arranged
— "Subsequently, Suharto arranged"
In the third meeting, which took place on 24 March
— " In the third meeting,which took placeon 24 March"
"reforming" itself.
— can remove the quotes
a Heart attack
— lowercase
on 3:00 p. m.
— Add a non-breaking-space (Template:nbsp) between '3:00' and 'p.m.'. Also, no space between 'p.' and 'm.'
Cikutra Heroes Cemetery, Bandung
— replace the comma with 'in'.
Images
[edit]- Images can take ALT text.
Done – Sorry for the late reply, but finished adding the alt text. Cheers, The man from Gianyar (talk) 09:51, 24 February 2022 (UTC)
- Images need PD US tags as well. For example, File:Ali Sastroamidjojo Nasional 28 Jul 1960 p3.jpg has both the tags.
Done – Didn't realize I haven't added the {{done}} on this one. The man from Gianyar (talk) 09:50, 30 March 2022 (UTC)
References
[edit]- Ref#24 should be cite-news, not cite-web.
Another nice work! Putting on hold. – Kavyansh.Singh (talk) 14:02, 2 January 2022 (UTC)
- @The man from Gianyar, any updates? No issues if you are too busy, I am willing to keep this nomination open as long as you wish, assuring that changes would be made. – Kavyansh.Singh (talk) 15:21, 18 January 2022 (UTC)
- Oh yeah, this nomination. Sorry, I completely forgot (busy with IRL stuff), but I'll start updating it now. Cheers, The man from Gianyar (talk) 16:30, 19 January 2022 (UTC)
- Looking forward to image changes, but as a vast majority of the changes are made, I'll promote. – Kavyansh.Singh (talk) 14:17, 3 February 2022 (UTC)
- Oh yeah, this nomination. Sorry, I completely forgot (busy with IRL stuff), but I'll start updating it now. Cheers, The man from Gianyar (talk) 16:30, 19 January 2022 (UTC)