Talk:Olympic Games ceremony/GA1

GA Review

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This is, on the whole, a clearly-written, comprehensive and well-organized article. There are some copy issues but I will take care of them myself.

First, in the intro it says: "While the current Olympic Games place an emphasis on athletic prowess; it is in the Olympic ceremonies where one sees a glimpse of Coubertin's original vision for the Games." I have tagged this as possibly an improper synthesis. It does seem to be true, but I'd rather we attribute this to someone else, or at least rephrase ("while" isn't discussed at words to avoid, but it should be IMO) and/or reposition this.

Other than that, there are a few places I'd like to see cites, which I will discuss a little later as I'm suddenly out of time here. Daniel Case (talk) 16:57, 15 February 2009 (UTC)[reply]

I've reworded the sentence to hopefully better convey the intended message. Please let me know if this is still unacceptable. H1nkles (talk) 17:25, 15 February 2009 (UTC)[reply]

OK, they're:

""There is no set protocol for concluding the opening ceremonies. In recent Olympics the opening ceremonies have ended well after dark and usually finished with a crescendo of fireworks accompanied by music"

Good call here, original research I think. I've removed the sentences altogether. H1nkles (talk) 17:25, 15 February 2009 (UTC)[reply]

And now I see that this is uncited:"However, Opening Ceremonies have continued to include doves in other forms; for example, the 2002 Winter Olympics featured skaters holding kite-like cloth dove puppets. The 2008 Summer Olympics included the formation of a dove by performers in lighted suits."Daniel Case (talk) 00:13, 16 February 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Upon further review I've searched and searched for a good source but nothing is forthcoming and I think this fact was from recollections of the opening ceremonies rather than actual sources, so I will delete the sentence as or. H1nkles (talk) 07:50, 16 February 2009 (UTC)[reply]

and

"This tradition posed a particular challenge at the 2006 Winter Games in Turin, Italy. The flag was passed from Sergio Chiamparino, the mayor of Turin, to Sam Sullivan, the mayor of Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada. Mayor Sullivan, who is a quadriplegic, waved the flag by holding it in one hand and swinging his motorized wheelchair back and forth eight times."

I added a citation here. H1nkles (talk) 17:25, 15 February 2009 (UTC)[reply]

That's all I need from the editors. Thanks. Daniel Case (talk) 17:00, 15 February 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for your review please let me know if there is anything else I can fix. H1nkles (talk) 17:25, 15 February 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Doesn't look like it. I'll be doing my copyedit and passing it soon. Daniel Case (talk) 22:12, 17 February 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Yeah thanks a ton!!! H1nkles (talk) 22:28, 17 February 2009 (UTC)[reply]