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Talk:Nathan F. Cobb/GA1

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GA Review

[edit]

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch
Initial review by Mgm|(talk) (please add comments in a separate paragraph and do not break up these comments):

  1. Well-written: Article suffers from overuse of semicolons. Suggestions about copyedits will follow below. (I moved an image to avoid collisions, fixed capitalization in the headers and done some copyediting myself).
  2. Verifiability: File:Revised Cobb Route.jpg doesn't tell the reader on what information the image is based. From what I could check, the rest is verifiable. (I'll do another spot check when content issues are addressed)
  3. Broad coverage: The article lacks any sort of coverage about the building of the vessel or any of the voyages it made in the 6 years of its existence prior to the final one. Try expanding the article (and perhaps renaming it)
  4. Neutral: No problems.
  5. Stable: No edit wars or stability issues.
  6. Images: The lead image and the one of the cottage is properly referenced and described. The route image has already been discussed above.

Content issues and copyedit suggestions:

  • Article doesn't mention SI units in addition to the imperial units as WP:MOS requires.
  • WP:MOS also says that it is not needed to have two spaces after a period.
  • The article says two boats were brought to the beach with wagons. Were those horse-drawn or some other type of wagon?
  • The sobriquet "Rothschilds among the toilers of the sea" should be treated as a direct quote and given a reference.

More suggestions for an engaging article

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As a shipwreck buff this is an engaging article. The lead section needs more of the main points from the article to comply with WP:LEAD. I suggest adding the following points in the lead:

  • the heroic rescue
  • Cobb Cottage
  • marker commemorating the wreck site
  • ship was named after a shipbuilder whose salvage company led to the United States Life-Saving Service (This point is an ideal item of a WP:DYK nomination.)

--Wpwatchdog (talk) 22:10, 8 February 2009 (UTC)[reply]

GA Review (follow up)

[edit]

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch
Follow review by Mgm|(talk) (please add comments in a separate paragraph and do not break up these comments):

  1. Well-written: Suggested copyedits and content issues will be covered below.
  2. Verifiability: File:Revised Cobb Route.jpg needs to specify exactly which sources the image is based. From what I could check, the article text is verifiable.
  3. Broad coverage: The coverage is stretched as far as it can be. Missing information has been explained satisfactory.
  4. Neutral: No problems.
  5. Stable: No edit wars or stability issues.
  6. Images: Only the route image is problematic.

Content issues and copyedit suggestions:

  • "Despite the cabin being swept away, the ship's hull was kept relatively intact during this sequence of events."
I have a very specific idea about a cabin when it comes to ships. I see a cabin as a room inside a ship that cannot be swept away without damaging the hull severely. Either the word cabin needs proper linking or an explanation must be given within the text.
  • "On the morning of 5 December 1896 the Nathan F. Cobb ran aground on a near shore sandbar and was subsequently washed ashore, falling victim to the strong winds and high seas associated with Nor'easter's, roughly 1000 feet off the coast of Ormond Beach, Florida."
The clause from "falling victim" to "Nor'easter's" cuts the flow of the sentence. It's probably better to mention these earlier on in the text. Secondly, how can a ship run ashore when it's still 1000 feat off the coast?
  • "sent to him by train from Jupiter, Florida where the Jupiter Inlet Life Saving Staion was located, approximately 180 miles south."
The final clause is ambiguous. Are we saying the station is 180 miles south of Jupiter or Jupiter is 180 miles south of the crash site? The text needs to be clarified.
  • "Through masterly surfmanship, they made it to the second set of breakers"
Unless you can put these words in the mouth of a person who was present at the time, "masterly surfmanship" is POV and should go. Either way, surfmanship is not a common term and needs explanation. Me and other readers will probably be thinking of surfer dudes when reading that.
  • "he and Edward DeCourcy removed their outer clothing and prepared to disembark."
Any idea why they'd remove some clothing? Disembark is a word that means to leave a vessel. The removal of clothing seems they were ready to board one. Perhaps you meant ready to leave on a rescue attempt?
  • "This monument was prominently placed in the sand dunes adjacent to where the ship ran aground"
adjecent doesn't seem to be the right word here. Unfortunately, I'm stuck for better suggestions on this one.
  • "Despite the company's good fortunes, the Cobbs were often praised for their humanity and general regard for human life"
Despite is a word that is supposed to be used for contradictory things. Since both regard for human life and good fortunes are positive things, I don't see how it can be properly used on the context. - Mgm|(talk) 09:38, 19 February 2009 (UTC)[reply]