Talk:Naroda Patiya massacre/GA1
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Reviewer: Hahc21 (talk · contribs) 05:24, 17 November 2012 (UTC)
Review
[edit]Comments
Update As of November 27, 2012, ΛΧΣ21™ has no internet connection and will finish the review at a later point in time. Thank you. DivaKnockouts (talk) 03:43, 28 November 2012 (UTC)
Prose comments
[edit]- Lead
- Will look at later
- Background
- "Following the attack,... during the Godhra train attack". Repetitiveness of "attack"
- Done
- The massacre
- Good
- Aftermath
- "total deaths went up from 1044 to 1267". be consistent with the use of 1,044 or 1044 (commas)
- Done
- I see overlinking of Sunder Singh Bhandari
- Done
- "Chief minister" or "Chief Minister"?
- Done
- I see overlinking of Narendra Modi, and also, on "The massacre" section, you appoint "Chief Minister" but do not mention her name.
- Done (Modi is a he =P)
- "Under pressure from the opposition party, the Indian National Congress, the committee". Something is missing, which committee? The sentence is broken after "Congress,"
- Done
- "which refused to stay the order.[51][52][53][54][55]" Isn't it better if you distribute the citations inside the paragraph?
- Done
- I have read until "Allegations against state government and Narendra Modi" and everything seems fine. I will keep reading tonite. — ΛΧΣ21™ 20:05, 2 December 2012 (UTC)
- Passed. — ΛΧΣ21 23:26, 10 December 2012 (UTC)