Talk:Louis Leblanc/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Orlandkurtenbach (talk) 23:41, 4 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for criteria)

It is reasonably well written.
a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects): b (focused):
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.:
It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall:
Pass/Fail:

Lead

Should "minor hockey" and "Montreal" be linked?

Done.

Overlinking on "Canadian"? If kept though, "United States" should also be linked.

Pretty sure I removed the excess links. If there is more, let me know.

It may just be me, but I feel like mentioning he was "one of the top ranked players heading into the draft" is unnecessary for the lead and goes without saying if he was picked in the first round. If kept though, there should be a dash for "top-ranked".

Removed the phrase.

The Canadian junior team typically refers just to the under-20 squad, so the 2011 WJC isn't the second time he's played for them. Maybe instead.. "it was his second international tournament.."

Changed the wording around.
Playing career

Why is "Rookie of the Year" capitalized in the body, but not in the lead?

Made consistent.

The third paragraph needed some work. I found the timeline of events confusing, so I went ahead and tried something myself.
Ditto to the fourth. It didn't really convey that him leaving Harvard was his decision (ie. he wasn't "forced") and the mention of his training camp was written out of chronologically order with the rest of the paragraph.

Look better now for sure
International

"played" twice in the first sentence.

Changed word.

Same problem as lead with linking to Canadian junior team.
Weasel phrase: "Some felt..."

Changed wording.

Just a comment in passing, but I thought that the more likely explanation would've been NCAA players get less exposure in Canada.

I'd of thought so too, but the article claims it was the NCAA schedule, and to a lesser extent, his exams. A few other articles about him being cut said the same thing, so I'm hesitant to change it.

Link and spell out CHL.

Done
Personal life

If Quebec has an accent, shouldn't Monteral have one too?

Done

Can you mention the year he moved back to Montreal and took a business class?

Done
Awards

The subsections seem unnecessary as there are only three awards.

Done
Images

I know it's not necessary for GA, but could you have some alt texts? Also, maybe some captions?

Done
References

11 is dead.

Found a current link for it.

Lemme know if you have any questions at all about any of my comments. Good luck! Orlandkurtenbach (talk) 23:41, 4 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Fixed up everything here. Anything else, let me know. Kaiser matias (talk) 04:46, 5 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Looks great.. passed in time for the gold medal game :) Here's to hopefully destroying Russia! Orlandkurtenbach (talk) 22:59, 5 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]