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Talk:John Noble MacKenzie/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: Harrias (talk · contribs) 06:59, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]


I'll take a look at this one shortly. Harrias talk 06:59, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

References

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  • What makes "Online Cenotaph. Auckland Museum." a WP:RS? The webpage acknowledges that "The development of the Online Cenotaph is an ongoing process; updates, new images and records are added weekly. In some cases, records have yet to be confirmed by Museum staff, and there could be mistakes or omissions in the information provided." and the contributors include a "Direct descendant". I'm not convinced this meets our standards for a RS.
  • I think it is OK for very basic, non-controversial information. It is published by the Auckland Museum and although anyone can submit information, it apparently gets reviewed by museum staff before going live. That's my experience at least anyway - I used it to submit details on a relative. In MacKenzie's case, I used it for his exact dob (but could replace with Wynn), exact dod and the fact that he was survived by his wife and two of three children. I would struggle to source the last two points without it. Zawed (talk) 11:31, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Royal Air Force, Fighter Command, 1939-1945": use an endash in the year range for the title.
  • "Two Fighter Pilots Decorated by the King": add the page and issue numbers for this reference.
  • Remove ", New Zealand" from the location in some of the references.
  • The Kenneth G. Wynn book looks self-published: is Wynn an "established expert on the subject matter, whose work in the relevant field has previously been published by reliable, independent publications", as required by WP:RS?
  • I believe he is an expert - the book I've used is one of his earlier works but it has been cited by several subsequent NZ aviation historians, including Claasen and Lambert, also used in the article, as well as by Vincent Orange. Since 1981, Wynn's work has been published by Gliddon Books (in 1990) and more recently by Pen & Sword. His 1990 book in listed in the bibliography of John Ray's history of the Battle of Britain. Zawed (talk) 11:31, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Images

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  • Only one image is used, which is appropriately licensed and captioned. Consider adding alt text, but it is not a GA requirement.
  • Maybe consider adding another image in somewhere, possibly of one of the types of aircraft he flew? No requirement, just a consideration.

Prose

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  • "claimed a Ju 88 as a probable" This need a bit more clarification, maybe as a footnote, just to make clear to a layperson what is meant by "a probable".
  • "Two more Bf 1092.." Is this a typo, should it be 109s.
  • "..as the Luftwaffe began resumed attacking convoys.." Too many words here I think.

Overall a very nice and tidy piece of work, well done. I'll stick this on hold. Harrias talk 09:21, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Harrias thanks for the review, I have actioned most points and responded to others above. Cheers, Zawed (talk) 11:32, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
All good, I'm happy to pass this now, nice work. Harrias talk 12:32, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]