Talk:Jellyfish/GA2

GA Review

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Reviewer: Dunkleosteus77 (talk · contribs) 20:02, 2 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by Dunkleosteus77

Just glossing over, you should probably talk about jellyfish and dead zones, and jelly falls User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 20:02, 2 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Added sections on both of these. Chiswick Chap (talk) 15:07, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

in the lead, clearly say that the Medusa stage is when they’re free swimming animals User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 00:20, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

It's mentioned in the second sentence. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 10:50, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

in refs, you’re inconsistent with using or omitting the month of publication User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 00:20, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done all the ones I noticed. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 06:29, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

I don’t think you need “sometimes called jellyfish” in a subsection title User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 00:20, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Removed. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 10:50, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Who is Paulyn Cartwright and you need to wikilink basically everything said in the following quote User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 00:20, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 10:50, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

What’s a coelenterate? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 00:20, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 10:50, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

What’s a velum? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 00:20, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 06:29, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

What’s a manubrium? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 00:20, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 06:29, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

What’s a mesoglea? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 00:20, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 06:29, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

substrate is an overly complex word, just use “the ground” or “a surface” User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 00:20, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 10:50, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

You should probably stick with the common names “stalked jellyfish” and “true jellyfish.” People’s brains are just gonna skip over “Staurozoa” and “Scyphozoa” and they look too similar so they’ll just be confused User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 00:20, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done where appropriate. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 10:50, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for taking on this review. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 06:29, 3 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

More comments

I made more comments but they didn’t save so I’ll come back tomorrow with the same comments User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 02:05, 4 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Or 3 days later User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

"...is contained by..." maybe use, "bordered by," or something similar User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Fixed. I always hope to slip in an 'is comprised of' to trigger a bit of AWB in such instances ;-} Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:20, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

"In the niches between the lappets," what does "niche" mean in this instance? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Glossed. Chiswick Chap (talk) 07:43, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

ref no. 29 isn't formatted correctly User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:19, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

wikilink septa

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:06, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

You define the rhopalia in one place and then describe it way later User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 09:39, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

You might wanna talk about general anatomy first and then the specifics of each class User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

I tried moving the Anatomy section to before the Taxonomy section and that had its disadvantages too. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 09:39, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

No I mean move the last 2 paragraphs in Anatomy to the top User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 18:53, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

ref no. 35 needs a {{subscription needed}} tag User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Added. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:16, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

In the Diversity section, use {{convert}} User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:01, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

I don't understand the Diversity section's purpose. Is it about size because it goes off topic with fission and lifespan and so forth? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Called it 'Largest and smallest' which seems to describe its function and content well. Within that scope it seems well focussed, i.e. some forms are small but only short-lived, etc. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Since you measure the lion's mane jellyfish in meters you should probably give Nomura's jellyfish in meters too User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 07:39, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

"...is nearly always much greater than the up-to-100 centimetres (39 in) bell diameter Lion's Mane" User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Up with which we will not put! Chiswick Chap (talk) 07:41, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

ref no. 47 is a deadlink User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

It's archived inside the ref. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:08, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

On the third mention of planula, you italicized and wikilinked it, and you also wikilinked Scyphozoa in the Life cycle section User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Fixed. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 09:39, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Also, use true jellyfish User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 18:53, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

The term is already mentioned as a gloss for Scyphozoa in the tree and in the taxonomy section, which should be sufficient.

what are transverse constrictions? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Glossed. Chiswick Chap (talk) 07:38, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

You wikilink fission on second mention

WL first instance. Chiswick Chap (talk) 17:57, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

You're not very consistent with italicizing vocabulary words User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Fixed, I think. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 09:39, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

ref no. 50 isn't formatted right User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Fixed. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:12, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

The Lifespan section seems to imply no one's seen a polyp User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Fixed. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:25, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Why is " 'several year' " in quotes? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 17:28, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Gone. Chiswick Chap (talk) 17:58, 7 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

That’s a pretty crude diagram you got going on there in the Locomotion section User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 18:53, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

It's accurate, explains something very surprising, and shows what needs to be shown. Not sure what else a science diagram should be, really. We can say "vertical section through the bell" or "sagittal section" if that would help. Chiswick Chap (talk) 19:08, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

No I mean aesthetically, but it’s not a problem for GA User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 21:41, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

I've tarted it up a little.

Even more comments

Isn’t there a species of herbivorous jellyfish in some lake? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 18:53, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Not sure what that might be referring to. We've mentioned Craspedacusta sowerbii which turned up in a canal in England (from China) recently. Chiswick Chap (talk) 19:08, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Looking it up, I was thinking of Jellyfish Lake User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 21:41, 8 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Added. Chiswick Chap (talk) 00:24, 9 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Meant for you to put that in the Diet section User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 16:52, 11 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

???

You say all jellyfish are carnivorous and then there’s this one that’s not User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 18:48, 11 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Mastigias eats plankton, so it's not an exception.

Being omnivorous, the statement “jellyfish are carnivorous,” implying all are, is false User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 01:35, 12 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Well an impeccable source boldly uses "All", actually. The point is that the stinging cells paralyse or kill wriggly animals, which are their prey. Brusca, Richard (2016). Invertebrates. Sinauer Associates. p. 296. ISBN 978-1-60535-375-3. All cnidarians are carnivores (or parasites). Typically, nematocyst-laden feeding tentacles capture animal prey and carry it to the mouth region where it is ingested whole. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:27, 12 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

In any case you need to bring up that there is an omnivorous jellyfish because it is notable and related to Diet User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 13:32, 12 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Mentioned in Diet section. Chiswick Chap (talk) 13:42, 12 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

spotted jellyfish from jellyfish lake in a symbiotic relationship with some algae User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 14:58, 12 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Oh is that what you wanted. Added to Diet section.

Sorry I’m going so slow User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 16:52, 11 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Not a problem.

”Jellyfish medusae” seems redundant User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 16:52, 11 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Fixed.

Why did you specifically mention the blue swimmer crab? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 16:52, 11 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Cut.

”Not only do they eat fish eggs and juvenile fish, but they also compete for food resources...” these two statements are not related User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 16:52, 11 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Rearranged paragraph. The connection is that jellyfish prevent fish stocks from recovering, by eating their young and competing for food, so once fish numbers go down, they won't come back up. Hope that's clear now.

”...leading to jellyfish having a difficult-to-reverse dominant position” I don’t know what this means User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 16:52, 11 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Reworded.

What do the circles mean on the map? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 16:52, 11 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Data records; larger circles mean those with higher certainty. Added to legend.

”Invasive populations can expand rapidly because they often face no predators in the new habitat,” has no ref User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 16:52, 11 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Cut.

there seems to be a lot of overlap between the Blooms section and the following sections User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 16:52, 11 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Cut down repeat mentions of blooming; merged Population, Jelly-fall, Dead zone sections into Blooms.

You should talk about Jellyfish Lake all at once instead of in two different paragraphs User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 16:52, 11 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Fixed.

Why is Jellyfish Master in italics? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 16:52, 11 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Fixed.

What exactly is the picture in Biotechnology of? The description just says it’s a protein registered with 1ema code User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 16:52, 11 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Above the file description is a section called SCOP Lineage, which says it's Green Fluorescent Protein, as the caption already says.

”...typically in circular tanks to avoid trapping specimens in corners, as in the Monterey Bay Aquarium,” that sounds like Monterey Bay traps jellyfish in corners User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 16:52, 11 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Fixed.

References

Just glossing over, there are some not formatted right and you have a ref error message User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 16:26, 12 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

All fixed, we think.

refs no 1, 8, 29 aren’t formatted right User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done, I think. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 19:41, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

ref no 7 is a deadlink User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

It was alive at 18:08 on 13 October 2018. It's also in the web archive https://web.archive.org/web/20180324085114/http://eol.org/info/442.

What is ref no 11? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Unnecessary, given ref 10 - let's delete it at the end to avoid messing up all your numbers below.

Now deleted! Cwmhiraeth (talk) 19:41, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

ref no 12 missing PMC and PMID, and the date published is inconsistently given here and in no 27 User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

doi present, no PMC or PMID as far as I can see. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 19:36, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

ref no 14 has a typo User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Changed.

ref no 21 is a blog written by a fiction author User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Replaced.

ref no 22 missing author and date published User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done

ref no 49 is missing author and the url’s aren’t formatted right User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done.

refs no 10 and 54 need publishers User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Added.

ref no 59 needs an author User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Added.

title’s incorrect for ref no. 64, stop at the dash User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Trimmed.

ref no. 65 the title is actually “Australian Marine Zooplankton-Jellyfish, Cladocerans” User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done.

why do you have the publisher Springer Netherlands in ref no 67? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Gone.

ref no 75 is citing a Current Biology paper which you might wanna find and use instead User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

I thought secondary sources were favoured over primary sources. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 18:58, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Journal articles are preferred over news articles User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 21:32, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Added ref to paper by Hays on ocean currents and marine life.

ref no 76 is missing a publisher User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 18:58, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

ref no 78 isn’t formatted correctly and is missing an author User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 18:58, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

why does ref no 95 have the open access orange lock? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Gone.

ref no 100 date given inconsistently

Fixed.

ref no 109 doesn’t mention the Monterey bay aquarium User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 18:58, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

ref no 114 is missing a publisher and the title’s incorrect User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 18:58, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

I have to ask, are you trying for FA or are you stopping at GA? User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk 15:08, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

GA is the goal, but really the question is off-limits. Chiswick Chap (talk) 16:49, 13 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]